Chapter 1: Under the Mercy of Few
Chapter Text
He had been running for his life for some time before he reached the tomb. The only sounds filling the passageway he intruded upon were that of his incessant panting and the pounding thump of his heart against his chest. With unblinking, dark lifeless pupils, he stared down the ancient halls of old. He found himself covering his mouth, a sickness uncomfortably threatening his stomach to shoot bile into and out of his throat. In spite of it all, he pressed on, dragging his tired and battered body through the entrance of the ancient tomb, enveloping him in its welcomed shadow.
His knees met the hard floor below. He cared not of their condition, as they were iced over to the point of numbness. And his mind, on the verge of insanity, was equally dull and depressant. Yet, he couldn’t give up now. He knew she was here, but his vision was failing him.
It was a surprise he still had the energy to stand. With the last bit of strength he could muster, he crept along the stone pathway in the direction of the light. His clumsy footsteps thudded around, bouncing off the winding corridor. Then, as the echoes faded, he finally heard it:
“Subaru?”
The voice had come from the shadows. Such a sound could pierce someone deep enough to touch their soul. It was a pure and crystalline chime, beckoning his faded senses like an eagerly-awaited dinner bell. He followed the direction from whence it rung so beautifully, feeling his strength returning to him with every step. His eagerness enveloped his body in a brilliant blaze of fire. Indeed, he knew just who this familiar and stirring voice belonged to. In instinctive response, his lips moved to speak her precious name, but no discernible words escaped him. He sighed in dismay.
But then there came a new sound. From the darkness he heard something. His panting must have lured her. Soft footsteps approached him swiftly; and after a moment, before him was laid bare a most serene and innocent sight. She stood there, a silver-haired, doe-eyed half-elf: the very reason and source of his plight.
His weary eyes narrowed. He could tell she had been through hell; her hair was dishevelled, and the pendant at the base of her neck was greyed over and cracked at the base. She hugged tightly his beloved, loyal jacket which had travelled with him to this new world, as if it were just as good a replacement as he himself. Likewise, she bore an expression of both deep confusion and unabashed innocence.
Emilia’s lips curved to a small smile. “Subaru, I’ve missed you sooo much,” she said playfully. It was clear she had been unaware of what was transpiring just outside the tomb. “I was sooo lonely without you, but I knew you would come back to me. You’ve never left me alone before, so I figured if I worked hard, you would return as soon as possible!”
“Emilia,” he said.
Her beautiful sound had roused him. But speech was still a difficult affair. In truth, he had scarcely managed even that. His voice was hoarse and weak. Blanketed by darkness, she herself was not aware of his condition. He moved closer to her, ever so slightly. The cast of pale moonlight showed his presence.
The half-elf let out a small cry and dropped his jacket. She went swiftly to his side and took his hand in her own. It was then she observed every detail of Subaru’s state. Gasping softly at the severity of his condition, her arms curved around him. Warmth returned to his body, enclosed by her protective embrace. Glistening eyes narrowed under the darkness-piercing moonlight, and her face contorted in a worried manner.
“Oh, my lovely Subaru,” she said, stroking his hair gently. “You just feel sooo cold . . . If you stay here with me, I’ll make sure to keep you warm!” An uncharacteristic giggle escaped from her rosy lips, and she smiled as a small blush spread across her cheeks.
Subaru felt himself going lightheaded from the feeling of her pressed against him. He wanted nothing more than to bury himself into the safe confines of her alluring bosom. His eyes lidded once, twice—almost shutting for good—but suddenly, he realized what he had come here to do. He shook his head furiously to banish the exhaustion from his being. Emilia squeezed his hand tighter, but was surprised when she felt his weak grip grow stronger. The bitter cold, which so silenced and shackled him before, dissipated at an alarming rate.
He was finally free to speak at last: “Let’s get away from here, Emilia,” he said with his newfound voice. “We have to go, now!”
Without a word, Subaru stood. He took her hand almost violently and turned on his heel towards the exit of the tomb. Withholding any questioning, she followed quietly, knowing now wasn’t the time for argument. The brevity of the situation was lost to her, but she felt an unfathomable level of pain and suffering emanating from his every movement. To calm him, she gently squeezed the boy’s hand again in the most tender way possible. It was a pensive gesture, a subtle moment lost to time. But she noticed him turn his head slightly, and for a moment his gaze met her own. His hazel brown eyes clashed almost unnoticeably with her swirling shades of purple. Under his study like this, she felt his fatigued and heavy gaze push her down with unbearable weight. Then he faced forward and continued his march of solitude. It was a short exchange, yet she felt such pain and sadness within those eyes.
As the pair exited the tomb, they were met with a chilling cold. Fresh snow graced the ground, and the trees were frozen over in an otherworldly manner. Emilia knew such a spell had to have been conjured by someone of both considerable skill and power. Even so, the trickling snowfall was noticeably fading, signifying an end to the inclement spell. It was why she found it surprising, that in its waning stage, the freezing air had retained its wild and deafening howl. Subaru stood silently with the half-elf’s hand still entrapped by his vice grip. His eyes were closed, and he appeared to be concentrating. Perhaps he was listening for something. She didn’t quite understand how or why things were happening as they were, so she remained silent. And he stayed there, wordlessly listening for that which escaped her knowledge.
But he only heard the shrill call of the whistling wind.
Subaru opened his eyes. “We still have time,” he finally said, his voice dark and low. “Here, I brought something for you.” Turning to Emilia, he reached into his pack and withdrew a familiar cloak.
Emilia’s eyes widened. “M-my cloak?” she questioned with a voice just as surprised as the look on her face. “I thought I had lost it sometime ago. Where did you find it?”
It was the magical cloak Roswaal had given her when they first met, adorned with purple-tipped cat ears and all.
“Sorry, Emilia,” he replied curtly, “but there’s no time for explanations.” With an outstretched hand, he offered the cloak to her. “Take this and put it on. It may very well be our only way out of here.”
She nodded gently and took the cloak from his hands. She wrapped it around her shoulders and pulled the hood over her head, concealing her peculiar silver hair and pointy ears. The cloak was specially imbued with powerful magic to obscure the identity of those who wore it, except to those she desired to reveal it to. In this case, only Subaru would be able to tell who exactly she was, and to others, she would appear to be just a regular human girl.
Subaru took her hand again. “Come on, Emilia,” he said, an unmistakable panic laden in his voice. “We have to hurry before it’s too late!” And without warning, he dashed into the snow, jerking her along with him.
As they ran, Emilia looked around. In the distance, she heard an ear-splitting shriek, possibly from some sort of demon beast. The smell of smoke was laden heavily in the air, as was the baleful scent of death. She felt Subaru grip her hand tighter, and then he began to pace himself even faster than before. They were already almost sprinting by this point. Through the heavy snow, it was difficult to traverse indeed. But even so, they kept running and running, out into the moonlit night sky under the infinitum of twinkling stars.
Every so often, there would be a blood-curdling scream coming from the dark, white-covered forest which surround them. But Subaru would pay it no heed, nor would he divert his attention from wherever he was taking her. This behaviour was so unlike the Subaru she knew she even felt a little scared. Though not for herself, she realized, but for him. For what he was carrying on his shoulders alone, and without her help. It pained her heart to be utterly useless as she was. She was panting now. Her breath was laboured as they made their way against the icy current of air. It bit at her lungs, threatening to stifle their function. Breathing was indeed becoming a difficult affair. Even if she could withstand such things more than others due to her lineage. No doubt her companion was faring even worse, but something not unlike pure madness drove him to fight through his ailments. Her fears were well-founded, even if she would never come to know it.
After some time, simple body movements were becoming difficult as the elements bore down on him with a heinous fury. It is perfect timing, Subaru thought ruefully. His eyes widened sharply: their goal was in sight.
They had found themselves encroaching upon the magical barrier of the Sanctuary.
He bit back a curse he so wanted to let out. His only choice was to pray the cloak would mask Emilia’s existence as a half. It was the one chance they had, his last-ditch effort he had come up with in his madness. Maybe, just maybe, this one idea would come to fruition. In this hell he had been damned to, there was still one last glitter of hope left; and it was because of this he held her hand so tightly. It was unintentional, how his grip; rather, his very touch channelled every ounce of pain and suffering he had endured into her. But he couldn’t mask such pains any longer. He felt like crying. His eyes lidded with would-be tears, and yet none fell because they were so dry and bitten from the icy wind. Forgetting such things, he gripped Emilia’s small, frail hand even harder, and pressed on.
And as she passed through the invisible barrier, Emilia herself had begun to feel light-headed. But she kept her composure and followed his footsteps carefully. It was evident the cloak she wore found itself at odds with the magical nature of the barrier erected around the Sanctuary. Normally, a half who dared to tread close to the barrier would find themselves lost to the world. The barrier was a trap to outsiders. But now as she went through it, she realized something. It would appear the cloak truly masked her presence. Even to something like the magical barrier of the Sanctuary. It was imbued with a powerful enchantment indeed.
For the first time, Subaru smiled to himself. It was out of view so the half-elf couldn’t see. The smile wasn’t one of happiness or joy. He couldn’t muster to bring himself to feel any such thing after the events which had transpired. It was a smile of sheer and utter turmoil. They had grasped the fading thread of hope to escape this place. To escape the bitter cold death the remaining people of the Sanctuary were suffering. For that, he felt such uncontrollable madness he could’ve laughed in such a moment. And the depths of his own sufferings were almost unbearable. Subaru mourned the loss of his friends, of those whom he travelled with. Truthfully, he didn’t want to go on living anymore. But he couldn’t leave Emilia to die alone in that lonely tomb, and to suffer a death so brutal and maniacal as to be eaten alive by the Great Hare. It was one he had experienced before. He couldn’t bear to let that happen to the innocent girl he had sworn to protect.
Just then something tugged at him, and he felt a weight pull him back, impeding his step. Turning to face what kept him from their salvation, he saw Emilia herself. She had collapsed into the snow—limp and unconscious—possibly due to the crippling effects of the barrier.
Subaru, not fairing much better himself, grimaced deeply, and knelt beside her still body. Even with the cloak, she had still fallen prey to the vile magic. He was in poor shape himself, but luckily he had grown a little accustomed to the devilish chill. Looking to the north, he grimaced. Behind them was the Sanctuary, a killing field for the Great Hare. They had to get away from here, fast, lest the vile famished Hare seek them out as well.
Subaru swallowed nervously, petrified by the memory of such terrors. The fear of death loomed ever over his shoulder. His loss of the power to redo, so suddenly and inexplicably, damned him to this forsaken purgatory forever. He was powerless now; redoing wasn’t a possibility anymore. He couldn’t just return to fix things as before. Without that ability, he was a regular person now. And it was because of this he couldn’t throw away his life so recklessly. With this realization, Subaru found a hardened resolve from within.
Giving up wasn’t an option. He had to protect Emilia now. He had to save her. He had to! This was the final chance: the final timeline, as doomed as it was. He had to make the best of it anyway. And so long as his silver-haired maiden still drew breath, he couldn’t resign himself to the sweet surrender of death so easily as Margrave Roswaal L. Mathers did. No, he would find a way to make things right, even with his back against the wall such as it was. He had to be that way. He couldn’t give up, if only to respect the memory of all those whom he lost.
There was no other reason for his existence now. Channelling what little strength he had left, Subaru braced her motionless body and hoisted her above his shoulders. To his joy, her petite frame did not prove to be an insurmountable task, even for the likes of himself to accomplish. He took a shaky step and stumbled, catching his footing before he fell. Cursing to himself, he tried again, trudging slowly through the snow. Yet again taking another step. One foot out in front of the other.
And as he struggled, Subaru stared forward, determined eyes beaming beneath a narrowed brow. There in this moment, he etched an oath to his soul:
“I will,” he said between gritted teeth.
The solemn oath: one he had made before. The beginnings of a vow carved and stamped in blood, yet it was but a whisper lost in the shrill call of the wind and his weakening resolve. And what came next was unintelligible amongst it all.
After some time, the moonlit sky’s curtain opened up, giving way to sunrise, and the horrible night was suddenly vanquished by a brilliant maroon red. It peeked itself over the green trees, sending its rays of orange and yellow cascading through the leaves and branches as if the heavens itself had fallen to the mortal world. By now, the snow had all but melted, the inhibiting environmental magic earlier had long silenced itself, giving way to birds chirping and other wildlife’s accompanying morning symphony. It was as if they had stepped into another world entirely: a peaceful green world opposite of the bleak, cold hell they found themselves entrapped in just the night before.
As the brilliant warmth returned to the air, Subaru breathed a deep sigh of relief. He hadn’t seen a sign of the Great Hare since they made it across the Sanctuary Barrier. He wasn’t sure why the Hare had ceased its brutal attack, but such ruminations were unimportant now. He was just glad to have escaped that hellish nightmare, as selfish and inconsiderate as it was.
Subaru didn’t know how long he had been walking. He didn’t quite care. Even as his body should have shut down from exhaustion long ago, he kept going, kept willing himself to not give up. He still carried the motionless girl on his back. By now, she was softly sleeping, as he could feel the tickle of her even breath on the back of his neck. He surely would have liked to rest alongside her. But honestly, he did not want to disturb her peaceful sleep, so locked away from this terrible world as she was. For now, they would travel in directions unknown, with unlimited potential destination. It didn’t matter though, for all he knew, anywhere was better than where they were coming from.
As the cool air had completely dissipated, Subaru had decided maybe it was time for a little rest. Taking a short path off the road, he found some soft green grass under a large old tree, adorned with winding moss hanging from its many branches. He gently knelt and lowered the sleeping girl in his arms down to the ground, laying her upon the velvety smooth grass. The shade provided by the tree was calming indeed. There was a gentle breeze in the air, so much unlike the violent blistering wind from the night before. The weather was agreeable, and the morning sun was now rising slowly over the trees of the beautiful forest.
The boy breathed in deeply, absorbing the atmosphere. He let out a haggard sigh. After a moment, he looked down at the sleeping beauty. Her elegant, rounded visage made it appear nothing had ever transpired at all.
It was in the soft features and contours of her face, he realized something: she was wholly unaware of the events which had transpired. In turn, she had invested her trust in himself to take care of her. And she did this, even if she didn’t fully understand why he had taken her the way he did. She had put her utmost trust in him. For this, he felt a warmth overtake his body at the realization she had surrendered herself to him in all her innocence.
He brushed her silver bangs from her eyes. They were heavy, even though she slept soundly. No doubt she was weary from attempting the trial so much and without rest. His eyes narrowed. He noticed the glowing green crystal at the base of her neck: it was unusually dull and lifeless, with a small crack near its base. Curious, having noticed it earlier when they were in the tomb, he went to touch it, wanting to beckon the vaunted spirit from his sleep.
But he felt nothing when his digit made contact with the lifeless thing.
There was no response. If Puck was truly gone forever, surely, their situation was even worse than he could have ever imagined. Subaru was almost powerless compared to most of his adversaries. And now Emilia might have lost a good amount of her power and familiar support as well.
Such dark thoughts invited an ominous voice to echo through his mind: “One day, even you can be like me, Subaru.”
He stepped back slightly at the memory of Roswaal’s dying decree. It rung in his head, beckoning him to give in to madness like that man had. He had gambled everything, even his life, on Subaru’s power to redo. Then, there was memory of the Hare ripping him to pieces— eating the magician alive—its freshness at the forefronts of his mind. What utter madness had taken over that man; and that power he relied so heavily on had ceased to exist for reasons Subaru could not explain.
Finally, he could only say the few words:
“I can Return by Death!” Subaru declared.
There were no ill effects or consequences for this. The sinister spirit, that which resided within him against his own will, was seemingly gone without explanation or cause. In his sheer madness, Subaru considered the possibility of suicide; to finally end it once and for all. His tiny, meaningless existence only had the importance it did because of the one power which gave him an advantage over anyone else, and now, that was gone too. Of course, if he killed himself, he would not return like before.
No, this time he would remain dead.
Feeling the dark thoughts of death welcoming him back into its loving embrace, he peered down at the sleeping angel before him. His eyes widened. Again, he recalled why he kept pushing himself to keep going in this evil world. He was doing it for her. It was a selfish reason. He wasn’t doing it for himself, and he wasn’t doing it for those whom he lost. That was only an excuse, he realized. He was solely doing it for her. She was his final link to this damnable world which had made him suffer like no other.
It was true. He was completely selfish, he realized. As if such an epiphany brought him back to reality, the adrenaline and shock of last night’s prior events began to wash away. His knees began to shake; the world felt faint. His world spun and spun, and then he fell to the ground next to the motionless half-elf, who slept so peacefully beside him.
He might have fallen a bit too close. Her eyes slowly lidded open, revealing her vibrant amethyst orbs. Pupils of aquamarine narrowed sombrely at the boy who lay weakly before her.
Without him noticing, she carefully sat up, and reached out her hand to clasp his. “Are you okay, Subaru?” Emilia asked.
His name rolled from her mouth like a gently flowing river. Meanwhile, she carefully interlaced their fingers together. Her voice was a chime from the sweetest bell, breaking him from his delirium; and he looked up from the grassy knoll, locking eyes with the exotic beauty which cascaded into his every thought. Instantly, he felt his heart stop, and his throat began to swell, rendering him unable to speak. His eyes began to well up, and a lone tear escaped down his cheek.
It was intercepted by a compassionate finger.
“Subaru,” she said, gently stroking his face. “Please, don’t cry anymore.”
But tears were now flowing freely from his stricken eyes. She cradled his head in her arms and led him down to her lap. It was a place where he found the peace none could give. In utter resignation, he collapsed into her; and all the emotions he had been holding in escaped freely with reckless abandon. He deteriorated further, wailing like a small child against her now.
It was an overwhelming occasion. This wasn’t the first time she had afforded his fragile self her lap; yet, this time he was truly broken. She could even feel her skirt becoming damp from his sadness. Emilia wished to calm him, so she brought her mouth within an inch of his ear and sung sweet nothings to him desperately. She stroked his damp hair back and forth. Drew sweet circles on his convulsing back.
Her tender embrace shattered his being. Laying there, Subaru exposed himself in all his grief. The soft melody of her soothing voice threatened to lull him into a trance. He felt the hair stand up on the back of his neck, and then a comforting warmth overtook him. Retreating into the depths of his mind was all he could do: the deaths of his friends had caused him such insurmountable grief; of her friends too, even if she didn’t know it. He didn’t know how to tell her. Maybe she already knew, maybe she could sense it emanating from his own anguish,
from every cry which escaped his mouth. Even so, if she knew, he figured she would still be strong, so she could bring comfort to him. Any the case, he didn’t care. He welcomed her soft and loving touch. He wanted to bury himself in her, to fall asleep and never wake up. And there in her arms, his sleep would be without nightmares, without visions of death and destruction. It would be a fitful sleep with only the memory of her enchanting smile bringing the deepest warmth to his being, ever-so-stricken by the pain of loss. A benevolent witch she was, and her thrall he had become. That was her power over him; that was her spell to which she had cast upon him.
Subaru released the agony of the world upon her small frame. Emilia felt the effects of this and blinked. And it was then a single, solitary tear of her own fell. It went wistfully onto Subaru’s hand as he desperately clung to her legs. In an instant, his cries ceased, the convulsions coming to an unexpected end. He slowly withdrew his face from the comforting escape of her lap, and with a keen eye, looked up at the woman who held him. Her gorgeous amethyst eyes were sprinkled with small tear droplets, ready to fall at any moment. Even so, she dutifully held them, as Subaru’s still fell solemnly.
And in the next brief moment, his hand cupped her cheek. Before she realized it, his lips had covered her own. Caught off guard, Emilia’s eyes lidded shut and her breathing noticeably slowed. Her body had ceased all movement for the first few seconds of the kiss. In her innocence, she really didn’t know how to respond at all. It took several seconds for her to grow more comfortable with these newfound emotions; and very soon she embraced his advances.
Beneath the lush canopy of ancient trees, the two lovers went largely unnoticed by the inhabitants of the forest. Squirrels nestled deeply in their warm burrows; birds fluttered throughout the air, playing their joyful games and singing their songs; the deer frolicked among themselves, enjoying the peaceful blue skies which graced them. Through all of this, the two continued their elaborate dance, ignorant of all the sufferings and happenings of the world surrounding them.
Subaru knelt forward, deepening his kiss, quickly becoming intoxicated with the sweet scent and taste of his partner whom he so loved dearly. Her glowing amethyst orbs were still speckled with tears, but still, they did not fall. As he continued, she lidded her eyes shut as a small, pleasurable moan escaped her lips. Subaru didn’t know specifically how long they had been locked together like this, but he wanted more, and more. As he breathed heavily through his nose, tickling Emilia with his desperate breath, she remained still, holding her own ever so diligently. Noticing this, Subaru ceased his wanton and unexpected romance to allow some air to enter her lungs. Emilia panted hoarsely as she lay back against the base of the tree, her normally rose-coloured cheeks now painted a bright shade of red. Recuperating her senses, she noticed Subaru’s continued stare, so filled with lust and desire as it was.
And stare he did. She looked nothing short of mesmerizing as she lay against that old wise tree, whose branches jutted out over them like ballerinas in step. Her glistening vibrant eyes reflected brightly in the sun, and her silver hair flowed gently in the wind. She was truly so otherworldly beautiful he couldn’t find a competent way to describe her using only words. He himself was full of wild emotion, from pure sadness one moment to a bashful joy in another. The best way to describe his current self, was pure uncontrollable mania.
Emilia, however, did not bear an expression of anger, or dismay, but of a serene innocence. She blinked inquisitively at Subaru, seemingly trying to read his mind, or see why he had come at her with such eager hunger. She exhaled short, quick heavy breaths as she stared him down, possibly somewhat disappointed he ended their dance so abruptly. Observing this, he quickly crawled over to her and placed his hand on her own, interlacing their fingers together perfectly. He had never felt so much uncontrollable desire for anyone in his entire life, His intense yearning for her overcame his normally pragmatic self. So he pressed himself desperately against her petite frame. His mouth orbited hungrily in the direction of her pale creamy neck. The half-elf, just recovering from what had happened, did not expect another advance. It wasn’t completely unwelcomed, nor was it unpleasant. She let out another sigh, a mixture between excitement, pleasure, and confusion. Simultaneously, Subaru began playfully kissing her neck, tenderly taking in every bit of her he could while lost in the heat of the moment. She closed her eyes, lost in his kiss. And there he absorbed her taste, her smell, and her touch, every bit of her so intoxicating he felt himself unable to stop. Her heat enraptured him, encasing him in a pleasurable ball of fire. Even if he desired to, he couldn’t pull himself away, tear himself from the banquet of her skin, nor the sweet flavour of her taste. It simply wasn’t possible, not that he wanted to, anyway.
For her, his kiss excited her just as much, as it was unlike anything she had ever felt before. She didn’t know why this was happening, but she couldn’t bring herself to stop his playful advances, and so she gripped his hand harder, and pressed pleasingly into Subaru, her too, beginning to lose herself in the moment.
As he felt her press herself into him so receptively and unexpectedly, Subaru almost lost himself right then and there. Instantly, he found himself dancing from the cream of her neck to the side of her jaw, to her ears, and back to her parted lips. It was a momentous feeling, and it felt nothing short of a small piece of heaven within this hellish world.
Emilia’s lidded eyes opened briefly. She could feel her lips move against his own. She tried with difficulty to mutter his name. They shut again. His hand travelled to the nape of her neck to gently tip her head back, so he could maybe delve even deeper. Subaru had lost all semblance of thought by now. He wanted to go further. And then suddenly, one of the lone tears she had been holding up until this point escaped quietly down her cheek.
Subaru felt the heat of its touch, and its admittedly salty taste. The shock of it momentarily released him from the dreamscape of a world he had escaped to. His eyes widened at what he had been doing. His surprise began to replace itself with anger, anger replaced itself with grief. Towards himself for his reckless actions. As he stared into her tearful eyes, he cursed himself for his insolence in taking advantage of her fragile and susceptible state of mind.
Even still, she stared at him with the same innocence and purity she always did.
I’m despicable, he found himself thinking.
Subaru didn’t say the words aloud, but he wanted to.
She lay against the mossy tree breathlessly, splayed out and still, like a deer alert in the forest. Confused at why Subaru had ceased his actions, her pupils were dilated to an enormous size from an excitement which overtook her every thought. Such feelings began to subside as she noticed his aura was much different than it was just moments before. His eyes were again
dark, full of sadness, and his perpetual grimace had returned to grace his heavy features. Mistaking her confused innocence for displeasure, Subaru used it to further justify his vain futility. He quickly stood, and with heavy steps he turned and walked off, clearly beside himself. Noticing this, Emilia stood, hastily gathering herself to follow him. She took hold of his hand to give the slightest gesture of reassurance.
Subaru immediately froze, caught in her figurative bear-trap.
“Subaru, why?” she asked, her voice breaking with every word. “What is happening? Why did we leave everyone at the Sanctuary? Please tell me . . . Please! I don’t understand what’s happening, or why we are here!”
It was a plea for a truth he couldn’t give her. Darkness overtook him, and as she mouthed something else, it was all but lost to his ears. Subaru felt a cold chill overtake his body; a brutal, merciless snap back to the reality which beset them. It was as if all the hot blood in his body began to dissipate, and with it the warmth as well.
It was Emilia’s nature to allow others to take precedent over herself. Subaru knew that, and yet even so he was still somewhat disappointed at her question. Amidst all the pain of remembrance from the night before, he still held his reverence of her over everyone else. He thought himself to be most disgusting thing in existence. Why did he always feel sorry for himself? Maybe he just wanted to be acknowledged by the last person alive who mattered to him; the only reason he still drew breath.
He flinched as he felt her hand squeeze his gently to awake him from his inner chastisem*nt. Turning to face her, he locked eyes with her amethyst orbs yet again, exposing his inner turmoil to her. Accidentally letting his guard down, he noticed her face contort into one filled with both concern and understanding. She had gripped both of his hands now, and he could tell she was silently begging him for an answer. He really couldn’t hide his emotions from her. It wasn’t possible. He had to tell her anyway; he couldn’t hide it from her any longer.
Subaru narrowed his eyes at her, and his mouth went to speak, although there was a slight pause as a small gust of wind ruffled the feathers of the forest:
“They are all gone,” he said, looking down as he did so. He wasn’t man enough to look her in the eye as her heart broke. “They were taken by one of the three terrible demon beasts, known as the Great Hare. It’s horrible, Emilia. Nobody survived . . . Roswaal, Ram, Beatrice. Everyone at the Sanctuary is gone. And the mansion . . . everyone there was murdered too.”
He fell to his knees in defeat, still avoiding eye contact with Emilia. Subaru hadn’t heard a sound from her since he admitted the truth. There was only a shallow breeze flowing through the trees, and an occasional chirp from the birds.
“I’m sorry,” he cried. “I’m so, so sorry . . .”
He resigned himself to his sorrow. It was all he could do to keep from breaking down right here and now in front of her. He had to be stronger, he had to. But he couldn’t keep it in. Not any longer.
But then a soft hand cupped his cheek, breaking his thought.
“Oh, my lovely Subaru,” Emilia said in the gentlest way possible. It was almost eerie how calming her voice was, as if nothing had transpired at all. She gazed at him as he slowly looked up at her face. “You’ve been through so much, haven’t you?”
The softness of her lullaby contrasted heavily with the bleak thoughts which plagued Subaru’s mind.
“Emilia,” he said.
There was a tangible pain laced in every syllable. His voice faltered, his body shook, and his face contorted in anguish. Subaru finally broke.
“Why is it so terrible?” he asked. “Why? Rem and Ram. Everyone is gone. Why? Emilia!”
By now he had latched onto her for dear life, frightened to lose her forever. He gripped hard enough he maybe would never let go. He surely didn’t intend to. Tumultuous emotions blanketed his fragile mind. Indeed, he was the weak one.
“I know,” she said. Her voice was soothing. She rocked him gently back and forth, saying: “Please, listen to my voice, Subaru.”
It was then Emilia realized, as she gazed down her broken Subaru, she had to be strong for him. For now, she was his strength, as he was so often hers. A tear or two escaped her glistening eyes as well, silently mourning her own losses. But for now, she had to comfort the one who bore the unbearable weight of their deaths on his shoulders, and his alone. And as he lay there in her lap, attentive to her sweet voice, she began to weave him a beautiful song softly into his ear. In his delirium, he couldn’t quite understand her, her song seemingly performed in a different language. Yet, he was also sure it was the most beautiful thing he had ever heard. It must have been the language of the angels, as its sophistication and elegance were unmatched. The purity and serenity of it captivated him, enchanting him under a mystical spell, and very soon he began to surrender himself sweetly to her crystal-clear voice. It flowed endlessly like the expansive ocean until the end of time; it was mixed with the singing voice of a songbird, flying freely through a mountain pass over an ancient azure river.
Subaru tucked himself into her, and his eyes slowly began to close shut. For once, he felt some measure of peace. And as he resigned himself to lay in the angel’s arms, she continued to sing her song to him long after he passed into the oblivion of peaceful sleep. His eyes were dried, and his breath was even now, no longer chaotic and full of agony.
She stroked his forehead with every bit of love and tender care she could conjure. She wished to comfort him; be there for him, as he had been there for her. He had done so much for her, even if it came to such disastrous conclusions as it did. He sacrificed himself for her, his purity and innocence. He was scarred now, she knew. Subaru was in his darkest hour, and she would be there beside him.
“Sleep ever soundly, my knight,” she said.
She had weaved all her love and comfort into that sentence. And soon, she found herself nodding off as well, lost in the peaceful moment for which they shared.
Perhaps her claim for the throne had ended, maybe her journey to free her people was all but folly. It didn’t matter anymore. The only thing which mattered to her now was this boy in her arms who had given her everything he had. And so, she would return the favour in the best way she could.
Her eyes lidded, once, twice, her grip on his hand loosening ever so slightly, even as his remained steadfast. In a moment’s time, beneath the brush of the luscious trees, Emilia fell fast asleep, in the arms of her hero.
If anyone dared to pass by a long and winding road southeast of Priestella, none would notice the two nestled beneath a wise tree just off the path. Only the wildlife of the forest curiously peeked at whom their new visitors were, eager to see who had intruded upon their territory.
But even they refused to disturb the two and their sacred rest.
Subaru’s sleep, while calm and peaceful, was full of thought. In the dark depths of his mind, he pondered to himself a future with Emilia and Emilia alone. Was he selfish for that? Was he selfish to want to find a peace in this world, when so many had suffered and died for nothing? He didn’t quite understand or immediately find answers to his questions; but even so, in the deep underworld of his subconscious, he dreamed of love. And amongst that wonderful dream of love, he heard a distant, but soothingly familiar voice.
Chapter 2: The Wish and the Wood
Chapter Text
Subaru felt small rain droplets tickling against his skin. He blinked his eyes open, struggling to banish the throes of sleep from his mind. Finally coming to, he carefully observed his surroundings. Though it didn’t take long for him to notice the beautiful blue skies had been replaced by a bleak, smouldering grey one. The sound of birds singing in the air, too, had vanished. In their place was the singing of toads as they frolicked about the new puddles.
Rain continued to pour from the trees from above; however, the large surrounding canopy provided ample shelter to keep them from the worst of the downpour. And bracing this rain, Subaru came to and got his wits about him. He sat up and shook Emilia gently. She hadn’t awakened as of yet. Fluttering eyes opened to reveal gentle pools of lilac. He smiled softly seeing that. It had been too long since he smiled so genuinely.
“Ah, look at this weather,” he said. “Shouldn’t we get to someplace drier, Emilia?”
Emilia smiled softly in return. She nodded politely in agreement. “Of course, Subaru,” she replied, raising a delicate hand to him. “Will you help me up, please?”
Subaru offered his own nod. He took her hand and gently pulled her up. Brushing off her skirt, Emilia noticed her apparent condition; she probably wouldn’t mind bathing and a change of clothes as well.
She pointed toward the west. “If we take this road a little further,” she said evenly, “we will come to the crossroads between the capital and Priestella. Maybe we should head there?” It was just a thought.
“Priestella, huh?” Subaru asked. He turned his head slightly in a wondering manner. “Isn’t that the port city between Kararagi, Gusteko, and the Vollachia Empire?”
Perhaps they would flee Lugnica: go far away from the troubles which plagued them. “Yes, it is, Subaru,” Emilia said nervously. She paused for a moment, thinking hard. Then
with a deep breath, continued, saying, “I wish to get away from here. Without Roswaal, my
sponsorship for the throne has ended. I don’t have a reason to be here any longer. And without you by my side, I would go off into the wilderness and live in solitude.” Her gaze fell to the ground between in front of his feet. “Before I met Roswaal, I lived alone in Elior Forest to the north of here. But now that I have you, Subaru, we can go anywhere.”
And once more, the two made eye contact. This exposed her spirited lavender eyes in all their splendour. Just one look at them, and Subaru was already struggling to keep his heart from bursting right then and there.
Slowly, Emilia reached her hand out to Subaru. “Will y-you take me away from here?” she asked.
Her stutter had revealed her uncertainty. Stunned, he looked at her with slight apprehension. Was this Emilia he was speaking to, or could it be the one whose mind was made so fragile by the dark magician’s deception? He couldn’t tell for sure, but regardless, he would do his very best to protect her in any way he could. And in this moment, he determined what he would do.
Emilia just watched as he claimed her hand. “Subaru,” she said. “You mean . . .?” The half- elf paused, her voice barely above a whisper: “You mean to support me?” She looked up at him with vibrant, emotional eyes.
He nodded and gave her a reassuring smile. “Of course, Emilia,” Subaru said. “I’ll always be there for you. I made a promise, and I don’t intend to break it.”
Such an oath was truly the last thing he had: to save her. All the other promises he made had been broken, both to others and to himself. However, he could do nothing about it now. He had to pick up what he had and move on. This was the one vow the rest of them had been built upon. And nothing else mattered now.
“Thank you, Subaru,” she whispered.
Her voice was shy. She gave him her best bright smile he so adored.
Subaru nodded. Returning her smile with his own, he said, “Let’s get out of this rain, Emilia.”
In her bashfulness, Emilia’s free hand rose to cover her mouth. A warm, rosy colour tinted her cheeks. “Thank you for being there for me,” she said finally.
With her hand now in his, Subaru decided to take her far away from here, away from all the troubles of the world. “And now we shall go to Priestella,” he said resolutely, looking forward with his gaze reaching deep into the forest before them.
Emilia looked wondrously up at him, and he turned once more and met eyes with her. Her smile grew wider. It was a soft, womanly smile. Their fleeting gaze soon departed from one another, and together, they took their first step into their journey.
There were many winding paths and intricate roads which led them to their destination, though not all were the safest. Some were infested with beasts of all kinds, and others with bandits ready to pilfer anything a passing traveller had. It was because of this Subaru and Emilia had to tread more than carefully. With limited supplies, they needed a way to find food and shelter. They would do well to avoid the road to the Mathers mansion. Subaru knew what dangers awaited them there, regardless if Roswaal was dead or not. It would be wise to avoid the main road in general. So he chose to take the road less travelled: to escape unwanted attention the unusual pair would bring. And nobody sung praises for halves in this area. With her likeness to the Jealous Witch, Satella, his half-elf companion would likely spend the majority of her public appearances concealed under the safety net of the magical cloak. Subaru didn’t mind it at all; in fact, the last thing he wanted was to bring about attention to themselves. He wished only to disappear with Emilia, never to be seen again.
That was the way they were going to live any sort of long and prosperous life together. So many agents of evil sought out the half-elf and for reasons he would never understand.
So it was by luck they made their way. Between the path leading toward Irlam Village and the Flugel Crossroads, the pair found a long-abandoned road, whose crooked path looped in and out and around as a snake would. What wasn’t a byproduct of their luck was the unfortunate accumulation of rain clouds overhead. By now, the weather had long since deteriorated into a murky bog of a storm. It meant the pair met very few travellers on the roads, as all the sensible merchants and vagabonds were nestled comfily in warm shelters. To make matters worse, the surrounding forests were shrouded in a misty fog. It was thick and blinding as the sheets of ice they crossed just the night before.
Subaru stretched his arms overhead. “Ah,” he exclaimed, “if only we had a dragon carriage!” This caused Emilia to chuckle quietly to herself beside him. But he truly missed Patrasche.
Hopefully that loyal girl made it out of the massacre by the great and terrible Hare. His
memory briefly took him back to when he had found the loyal beast trapped in the stables of the Mathers mansion. He had ridden her back to the Sanctuary before setting her free, as she could not traverse Roswaal’s frozen hell. Black memories flashed in his mind. He saw Petra and Frederica: the violence of their deaths, and the despair it brought. He shook his head to release them from the fetter of his thoughts.
Emilia asked, innocently enough, “Maybe we can negotiate a ride with someone?” Her voice thankfully broke him from his momentary return to grief. She continued, saying, “There’s always someone willing to pick up a—”
“No, no, no!” Subaru interrupted in a gesture of disagreement. “We should avoid contact with anyone for now. I don’t want anyone to know where we are going or our identities. It’s safest for us that way.”
Emilia nodded quickly in agreement. “Certainly!” she replied.
She wasn’t dull by any means; and now that she thought about it, it would be extremely important to conceal her identity to everyone but Subaru. With caution, she adjusted the hood she wore back over her long pointy ears, concealing them from view.
Feeling his stomach growl profusely, Subaru grimaced. He hadn’t eaten for what felt like days now. He was certain Emilia hadn’t either, as she had locked herself away for days at a time in the tomb. She attempted the trials until her mirror of a mind fractured as glass would. He looked back at her, watching her keep pace quietly behind him. For now, seemed to be at ease; and outwardly appeared not to be in any more distress than he was.
He felt his lips curl to a smile as he watched her. She truly was amazing. Her strength seemed to grow as his began to fade. It was like a natural balance they shared: an ability to pick each other up and hold one another through the most desperate of times. He was just worried about the fragility of her mind. He still remembered her confession of love to him in the tomb, real or unreal as it was. Her mind surely was in a delicate state during that time. She was difficult to read. Always did she choose to portray strength to him. But he would keep the revelation of her love as a distant memory. It would remain there, locked away in the vault of his mind. Never free to roam toward the centre where his heart lay. As time passed, he would allow her fragile mind to mend itself. He would let his own do the same. Time was the mender of the heart, his mother always told him.
Subaru was jolted from his deep thoughts by Emilia shouting excitedly. She was pointing in a peculiar direction.
“Through the trees,” she said. “I see smoke there over a clearing. I wonder if it could be Nicia?”
“Nicia,” he said, “is that some sort of village?”
He peered through the forest, cupping his hands as if he were staring into an eye glass. Through the damp foliage and moderate trickle of rain, he could indeed see a light hazy smoke through the clearing. The fog was ending as well. No doubt there was something over there.
“It is a small village betwixt Priestella and Ladrima,” Emilia said evenly. “We can find food and shelter there as we wait for the storm to pass. Should we make a stop there?”
Subaru rubbed his ravenous belly. “I think so,” he replied. There was aching pain from hunger infusing into his very voice. “It seems to be a good size. We could avoid unwanted attention there and not get lost. Besides, we really need to get something to eat.”
In truth, he would prefer to make the trek straight to Priestella. The city was large enough for anyone looking to lay low to lose themselves in. They weren’t criminals on the lam by any means, but they wanted to act like such. Avoiding the scrutiny of others was important right now. Roswaal was a man of great renown. When his death reached the ears of the kingdom, search parties would follow. Some might even blame Emilia for the demise he created for himself. He wouldn’t let her shoulder the blame for that bastard’s evil doings. Pushing such thoughts to the side, Subaru took her hand and the two began to pace themselves a little faster now. The threat of the woods was behind them. Now civilization was close, and his heart beat a little faster for it. He couldn’t wait to find himself in a warm cozy bed by the fire to enjoy a nice, hot meal. If he could just sleep for more than a few hours at a time: that would better his mood. And he knew his companion desired such things. She was probably even more stressed than he was: from the trial, the deaths of her friends, and the loss of Puck. Such numerous and devastating loss. He didn’t want to know what she was truly feeling. But when she sorrowed, he would be there for her.
The two crossed a small wooden bridge arched over a shallow creek. Subaru grew more and more anxious as they approached the village. He felt himself starving, and desperately thirsty too. Their provisions were non-existent, and they had been travelling for almost a day without anything to fuel their tired bodies. Finding himself unable to last any longer, Subaru raced down toward the stream, and he fell almost headfirst into the water. In his hunger he drank from the fresh water, cupping it in his hands and bringing it eagerly to his mouth. He didn’t realize how thirsty he really was. Even if it wasn’t the most sanitary way to drink, he scantily cared of such things. No time or way to boil water, he decided. Likewise, Emilia had knelt beside him, enjoying some of the pure stream herself.
It was a peaceful moment shared between the two. The sounds of the gentle raindrops coupled with the rhythmic flowing of the river was soothing indeed, even if Subaru found himself almost shivering from being damp for so long. He was just glad to be at peace with Emilia for now, and finally soon they would have some ample rest.
“Not bad, huh?” Subaru asked. He continued drinking from the river.
“It reeeally is good,” Emilia said happily. She always stretched out her words when happy. “I was sooo thirsty!”
They both shared a good laugh between themselves. It was a good lull in their journey to be had; and soon enough they continued on their way. The village was close, not even a half mile’s way yonder down the dirt pathway. After all the walking they had done, it was comparatively no time at all before they passed through the entrance of the settlement, quickly finding themselves at a broad wooden gate. At their arrival, a rotten wooden panel slid open, revealing a cloaked figure who eyed them down with peculiar curiosity.
“Who goes there?” the cloaked figure asked the pair. “What brings you two to Nicia? We want no troubles’ here.”
“Our business is none of yours,” Subaru said, his voice defiant. “We’ve just come to seek a little bit of warmth and shelter. If you would allow us, that is. We won’t stay more than a day’s time, and then we’ll be on our way.” He showcased his partner who, outwardly to others, appeared to be a normal girl.
The man nodded in understanding, and he unlocked the gate. Cracking the door open, he eyed the pair carefully. “A boy and a girl,” he said, “all the way out here and with no supplies? Oh, well, suit yourself then. I apologize for beforehand, but you can’t be too careful these days. There’s been word of bandits and demon beasts all over Lugnica! Terrible times, these are.”
Subaru nodded in understanding of the guard’s worry. They followed their safe passage into the village. To which the village itself was rather impressive, for its remoteness as it was anyway. It lay far from the direct road leading to Priestella. It wasn’t an ideal trade route, but clearly the village was functioning at a high capacity, as the buildings all appeared to be of decent condition.
Due to the inclement weather, their supposedly-romantic sightseeing was cut short in the village. He counted a great deal of shops and stores to choose from, but he had his eye on the inn which resided across from the gateway into the village. Its nameplate read ‘The Dancing Dragon’. The artwork on it showed a ground-dragon in a dance with a mug of mead in its hand. Aptly named, he thought.
As the pair entered the inn, they were met with a merry sight of men and demi-human alike, all sharing in drink and festivity. The inn was dark and dreary, hosting travellers from all walks of life in its halls. It was like something straight out of a fantasy book Subaru used to read when he was a kid. Staring in wide wonder, he shot Emilia a smirk, and she smiled softly back at him.
As they approached the bartender, he stared at them with one wide eye; the other had apparently long since been gouged out.
“Well, would you look at what we have here!” he exclaimed, his voice both booming and bombastic. “What brings you youngins all the way out here to Nicia?”
“We’re just staying for one night,” Subaru said, placing three gold coins on the table. “Would you mind to give us a warm room and a hot meal?”
Taking the gold pieces in his hand, the bartender smiled greedily to himself. “Well,” he started, “we might have been completely booked before, but I think we can accommodate you!” He turned around and grabbed two wooden bowls for the pair, and two mugs followed.
Subaru watched him curiously as he scooped out two nice-sized bowls of soup for them. Emilia smiled brightly to him, clearly starving. The bartender also filled the two half-pint mugs full of mead. “Here you two are!” the barman said, revealing to them their dinner: spoons, mugs, bowls and all. “Last door down the hallway, on the right.”
Taking the old key from the bartender’s massive stubby hand, Subaru gave him his thanks, and the two made their way through the bustling inn all the way to their room. Sliding the key in and turning it deftly, Subaru opened the door, revealing a nice little comfy room complete with one bed, a desk, a lantern, and a pleasant view of the village through the window and a lounging area. The bathroom really wasn’t all that impressive, though, but it would have to suffice.
He turned to Emilia, noticing her struggling to carry the two mugs of mead and the bowls of soup. A laugh escaped him, and judging by her expression, she did not enjoy it at all. “Here, let me get those for you,” he said, taking his mug and bowl from her. A moment longer and she probably would have dropped it all. He then sat down, saying, “Okay! Let’s eat!”
Emilia nodded happily to her partner, and the two dug into their meals with absolute gluttony. Forgoing table manners, Subaru slurped down the soup and chugged the mead with in the fashion of one’s last meal. Laughing politely at the sight before him, Emilia sipped some mead from her mug as well. She enjoyed the pungent burn of alcohol as it trickled down her throat.
“Mhmm,” she hummed.
Her pleasurable groan of contentment was uncharacteristic. While not an alcoholic by any means, she really did enjoy a good drink. Especially after all the events which occurred. All her stresses and worries slowly washed away with every sip. Subaru, however, had not savoured his meal at all, devouring it all just as he had got it. The mead was surprisingly stronger than one would expect. He had begun to feel a little lightheaded. Of course, back home in the human world, he would have never thought to drink alcohol like this. But here, alone with Emilia and in another world, he could make certain exceptions.
“It’s sooo good,” Emilia said, drawing out her words in pure pleasure. She tilted her head and stared inquisitively at her partner across the table, saying, “Subaru, are you well?”
She looked at him in a funny way, as if something were wrong with his face. His cheeks had turned bright red as if he was nervous for whatever reason, and his face was sort of blank.
Emilia thought he might be allergic to alcohol. But he was wordless in his reply. His gazed past her absentmindedly, and the expression on his face became unreadable. Emilia grabbed his hand and squeezed him slightly to get his attention.
“Hey, are you okay with this?” she asked, gazing into his ever-fading eyes. “You drank that sooo fast! I thought you didn’t enjoy alcohol like that, Subaru.”
It seemingly took him a few seconds to realize she was staring at him dead in the eye. He gave her his best wiry smile and a curious thumbs up. Wordlessly, he stood up and plopped unceremoniously on the bed, obviously unconscious. The culmination of alcohol, exhaustion, and the warm environment must have taken its toll on him. Emilia chuckled quietly to herself, covering her mouth to stifle an even louder laughter. Subaru truly was something special to her.
In her worry, she noticed Subaru had not taken his clothes off, which were still damp from the rain outside. If he slept like that, he would surely catch a cold, she figured. Sighing gently, she stepped quietly over to his motionless body and, very carefully, began to remove his shirt. Her cheeks immediately burned red as she did so when his naked body had been revealed to her. Her innocence might have been too much for her to handle sometimes.
Luckily enough, he had not stirred one bit as she had done so. And after hanging his shirt on the wall as well, she too tucked herself into bed, savouring the warmth which overtook her body. It was a nice, warm feather bed—which was actually very comfortable, she might add
—at least for the price they paid. Pulling the sheets back, she tucked Subaru in, who still lay unconscious on his stomach. His mouth hung open just slightly, and his breathing was even and smooth.
She had never slept in such proximity to someone like this in the long years of her life. She could feel her heart pounding heavily in her chest, exhilarated to be this close to Subaru. She was so close, in fact, she could feel the warmth of his body roll off onto her own, encasing her in his presence. Though it didn’t take long for her to settle into comfort. Pulling the warm sheets over herself, she too began to feel the effects of exhaustion overtake her.
Unbeknownst to Emilia, the emerald-green crystal at the base of her chest pulsated, full of life.
Something hammered his skull, pulling him violently from the grips of sleep. Finally coming to, Subaru looked around. The room had a low dim light to it, as the sun had not yet fully crept out of its own rest for the day. Everything was blanketed in a genial low shadow. The village outside was quiet, except for the atmospheric sounds of cicadas and the occasional morning bird’s song.
With a groan, he rolled onto his side and rubbed his temple in a vain attempt to nurse his assailing headache. In doing so, he felt something both immeasurably soft and unbearably warm press against his body. Gently, slowly, and with great caution, he pulled the sheets back.
If his vision wasn’t already swimming with haze and delirium before, it was now.
There against him, comfy and snug, was the girl of his plight. Emilia’s mouth was slightly agape and her breathing evenly paced. It was quite obvious she was in a deep sleep. He could stare at her like this for hours. His eyes narrowed looking upon her resting form, observing each and every detail about her to make her so unique a person.
And then, he realized she was naked.
He could feel his face heating up from the mere notion of it. While recoiling away, he covered her with the blanket and crawled backwards so fast he almost fell completely off the bed. Cut off from Emilia’s heat, he felt a cold draft banish his own warmth, almost causing him to shiver. Then he realized his shirt was missing too. His face sooner became red from ear to ear.
By now, Emilia had awoken from the commotion. She peeked out slowly from underneath the blankets, covering her bare chest from Subaru’s view. Her amethyst eyes blinked sleepily at him, silently questioning his antics. Even though he couldn’t see anything memorable in the darkness, his imagination did most of the work for him.
“Emilia!” he sputtered hopelessly, struggling to find the words. “Why are you like that?” His mouth was almost agape as he stared shyly at her.
Said half-elf just continued to look at him inquisitively from beneath the haven of her sheets, with only her collarbone and above visible to him. She smiled mischievously to herself, realizing it was just enough to get his imagination running wild. She decided to have a little bit of fun with him, if only just to tease him a little bit.
She looked up at him with her large, doll-like eyes. There looking into those, he almost felt himself melt from sheer terror. It could have been panic and hysteria. Whatever it was, his heart pounded with force against his cage of a sternum.
“Oh, do you mean this?” she asked coyly. She pulled the sheets up a little further to cover her nudity. “You don’t want to sleep with me, Subaru?”
She slowly laid her head back down on the pillow. She played the innocent girl too well, nestling herself there, deep within the warm confines of the blankets. And as she did this, the half-elf never broke eye contact with him, nor did he to her. She just laid there, silently taunting him with her otherworldly beauty and presence.
And her question had been rhetorical, he realized. She knew he wanted her. She knew everything about him. He had confessed his love for her many times over, and even she once to him. But did she really understand love, and what it meant? Did she remember that time in the tomb, when in her fragility, she tried to give herself to him? He had denied her— abandoned her, even—although he found himself crawling back to her when the world came crumbling down. In his despair, he had been desperate for the warmth of her love. There at the end of time, when everything was gone, he wished for nothing but to bury himself into its oblivion and never let go.
Gathering himself now, he noticed his shirt hanging by the window. He stood, and in a swift action, threw his shirt on. Emilia eyed him carefully from the bed, wondering what his response would be. But he turned to her and said nothing, surprising her with his silence.
She felt confused, looking at the boy who stared so quietly at her. The Subaru before her was different than the one just moments ago; one who was nervous and unsure of himself. Now, he appeared to be hardened, determined, able, and full of charisma.
He then sat on the bed next to Emilia, wanting to speak but pausing momentarily, thinking carefully about what he was about to say. His expression softened, and he let a gentle smile through his façade.
“Emilia,” he said. His voice was hesitant, and he paused briefly before continuing. “I have made my love for you very clear by now, haven’t I?”
It wasn’t a question really, just a reminder of his loyalty to her, in the impossible case she had forgotten. Now the candle on the side of the bed had long since melted out, giving off a heady, scented smoke which drifted through the air. For too long did the pair sit next to one another before a voice broke the unwanted silence.
The voice belonged his half-elf companion. Emilia, he could tell, was suddenly overtaken by a great and terrible lament.
“Subaru,” she said weakly. “I didn’t mean for it to come across that way.”
The half-elf hadn’t expected to receive a response like that, especially not here and now. Forgetting herself, she reached with great care to touch his hand. But still he remained motionless.
“Please, I’m sorry,” she said.
She still laid beneath the blankets as she fingered at his hand. He remained motionless as she touched him in her loving way. It was a small thing—one little solitary touch—but it was meaningful. But Emilia didn’t understand why she struggled so deeply in verbally expressing her feelings to him. She could feel them vibrate within her, the strong feelings pulsating in her chest. It made it difficult to breathe sometimes. It was a foreign feeling; to love him like he loved her. Maybe precisely because of that, it was so difficult to express in words. No simple ‘I love you’ would suffice; it wouldn’t be nearly as meaningful. No, her love for him was more than that. He was more than that to her. She would never forget his love for her, decided she could certainly show him with action when her tongue failed her. Oh, the heat of it all, she mused. It was intoxicating.
And still, he was still cold, so-utterly-cold.
Grasping his shirt, she pulled him down to her. It must have caught him off guard. She was able drag him under the sheets and with little resistance. Her hand snaked around the nape of his neck and to the back of his head, caressing him against her body. Putting up little resistance, he laid still like a possum playing dead in her arms. It probably had something to do with her bare body being pressed so suddenly against him. She didn’t mind however, even if she was just a little on the prudish side. This was a moment which had to be shared between the two.
It was purely innocent, blissful love. Nothing more, nothing less.
As he felt her hand draw loving circles on his back, he snapped back to reality. He could feel her hot breath tickle him, as she had buried her face in the nape of his neck. His immediate shock turned to understanding, and he returned the embrace, wrapping his arms around her in a reciprocal gesture. Her warmth was his obsession. As her soft supple chest was pressed against his own, he suddenly wished he hadn’t put his shirt back on. He wanted to feel her against him, feel the softness and warmth of skin-on-skin contact. Not even a few seconds of their embrace had passed, and already he could feel nothing but the sensation of her enveloping heat.
It was, simply put, unmistakably heavenly.
So he pressed himself deeper into her, wanting more, and she in return held him tighter. She could feel his want. His emotional attachment to her was unbearably strong. Maybe she could take it one step further. In the darkness, they couldn’t see each other well, but they could certainly feel every inch of their bodies.
Removing her hand from the small of his back, she wound her way across his waist and to the hem of his shirt. In one smooth motion, she pulled it over his head, removing it. He didn’t even have a second to object. Not that he wanted to.
“Oh, god,” he whispered.
His lips were against her pointy ear, she pressing her hot body against him. He probably didn’t mean to say that out loud, but he did anyway. His unabashed reaction made Emilia smile haughtily to herself. It humoured her that she could send him into such excitement without much effort on her part. It gave her inner peace to make him feel pleasant. And what a bliss it was. Subaru was there. Sweet bliss, bliss and serenity. She was heaven made flesh, he realized amorously. He knew it before, her angelic beauty seemed almost otherworldly.
But now he was sure.
He thought that perhaps all half-elves were this enchanting. He remembered the first time he laid eyes on her: just one look, and he had fallen under her mystical spell. Her allure was so strong he found himself orbiting toward her without even realizing it, stepping closer to her without thinking about it. His feelings grew substantially for her without any real rhyme or reason. As much of a bad taste as it was, she had bewitched him, without him ever realizing it until now.
He felt Emilia squirm against him. She then craned her neck, and whispered unexpected something into his ear:
“Touch me more, Subaru!”
Those sultry words processed slowly into one ear and out the other. Her velveteen seduction was too much for him to handle, and only one thing found itself a suitable response to her plea: giving into her mesmerizing temptation. His hands toured her back, winding up, down and around, exploring new territories freely as if they bore a mind of their own. Even if he couldn’t see her, he was absorbing every soft contour of her body. He was tasting her without ever taking a bite, he was drinking her without ever sipping from that forbidden cup. Oh, god, how he wanted to do all those things. Her skin was softer than the smoothest silk, and her smell was something else entirely. She smelt faintly of a rich jasmine, which he enjoyed with each deep breath he took. He wished he could just lay there wrapped up with her for the rest of his life. He embedded his face lovingly into her rich, silver hair. What a beautiful, majestic colour it was, so unique and so amazingly brilliant. He could rest there for hours if he so pleased.
And this Emilia, there was something different about her. She felt surer of herself, surer of her love for him. As previously, she hadn’t quite understood her feelings for him. But now, it seemed she had given into the desire which clashed and dissipated like lightning between the two before. Her demonstrating her love for him, it just made him want her even more. She was the sweetest of the forbidden fruit. Once he had one bite, it took every ounce of his will to stop; and perhaps even that wouldn’t be enough in the end.
By this time, Emilia was flushed beyond recognition. Her normally pink-hued cheeks, which graced her alabaster skin, swelled to a deep blood-red colour. She tried to keep her composure for Subaru, but it was becoming exceedingly difficult the more he explored her body with the lust and need he was demonstrating. His touch was gentle, but clearly, he wanted more. She could feel him knead her softly wherever his hands found rest. Her back, her naval, her sides, and even occasionally her soft, tantalizing legs. He seemed to love them especially, giving them a gentle, loving squeeze whenever his hands met their surface. She realized, somewhat mournfully, only her chest seemed to be off-limits to him.
She recognized the fealty of the unspoken limit he had set upon himself and their new budding relationship. His nobility and chivalry made her smile. He had made her feel loved and wanted, yet he didn’t go as far as to violate their newly signed contract between them. It was a contract reflective of both their professional and personal relationship: one between lord and knight, and between a man and a woman. Much like he would never go against her favour, he would never force himself upon or allow himself to take advantage of her. She didn’t know where this newfound love would take the two, but she was enjoying every second of it.
When had she fallen for him? It was something she didn’t quite understand fully. One moment, she was so unsure of his love for her, and the next, she understood so completely there was no doubt in her mind her feelings for him. He had tried so hard to prove himself, to prove his words were meaningful to her. He continuously sacrificed himself for her, and her plight they once shared together. Perhaps it was that solemn night in the tomb when he came to rescue her. She had realized even though he had lost everything, he continued to exist for her sake. He continued to live, just for her. His love for her was so strong, so unshaken by devastation, that even at the end of the world, he still tried to salvage what he could, and to make her happy.
That was her Subaru. That was who he was to her. He was her saviour, her rescuer, her beacon in the darkness, leading her through an ever-expanding shadow which haunted her at every turn. And above all else, he was her knight.
It was the truth. He held no malice toward her, only the will to defend her, to protect her, and to serve her. His love for her was only pure, she realized, and so her own love for him had unsurprisingly revealed itself. What was once locked away tight in the corners of her mind now shone itself brightly and with radiance.
It was a quiet thing, she mused: to fall in love. Until she was utterly overtaken by such feelings, she hadn’t even realized it was happening.
The early morning had been growing long, with the sun just about ready to peek over the horizon, bringing light to the dark and dreary night.
Subaru and Emilia remained comfortably in their embrace, enjoying the closeness of one another. They hadn’t explored any further than necessary, unwilling to damage their newfound love for each other with unwelcomed and unbecoming advances. Instead, they shared their innocent love together throughout the early morning, silently comforting one another once again. Neither Subaru nor Emilia dared to fall asleep, because it would have surely been a waste of such an intimately personal moment between the two. So, they lay wide awake, keen to their heightened senses, absorbing one another almost entirely.
Subaru remained there on his side, his soft hazel brown eyes locked with her passionate, sparkling amethyst orbs. His hand rested lovingly on her cheek, stroking her ever so gently. His other hand had found its way down to her creamy long legs, scooping one of them up to rest it over his body. By now, his hangover resulting from the night before had long since dissipated. Instead, he felt nothing but peace and happiness.
Her hands had rest themselves plainly on his chest, feeling the slow up and down rhythm of his peaceful breathing. The rhythmic beating of his heart soothed her soul. It was there, against his chest, where she felt his life as the beating drum of his heart kept its steady dance forevermore. It made her feel completely at ease within their newfound world together. Love certainly is something else, she mused silently.
There had been no verbal conversation between them for some time, as they just enjoyed the peaceful quiet of their company. Subaru had made it clear on his part he was enjoying the moment. Their passionate foreplay had long since ceased, but it led to nothing more than that. Now, he just wished for nothing else but to bask in her presence before the start of the day.
As if on cue, small rays of golden light broke through the window of their room.
It had to be just coincidence, but Emilia’s pale snow-like skin, moon-silver hair and bright purple eyes reflected the sun rays so perfectly; it gave her such an angelic complexion Subaru just couldn’t understand how such a person could exist. For the first time this morning, he had a clear view of the captivating half-elf who lay so passionately in his arms. She was even more beautiful than he could ever imagine in his mind.
She eyed him with her big vibrant orbs. But they were lidded ever so slightly. Her expression had a playful shade to it, her mouth almost a smirk. She was, quite simply, highly amused at his incessant gawking.
“Why, is there something wrong, Subaru?” she asked, leaving him dumbfounded at her playful advance. “I noticed you don’t look so well.”
Subaru smiled, squeezing her cheek. Standing up off the bed, he covered her nude body respectfully with the blanket. He then turned to take her now dried clothes off the wall and handed them to her. She nodded and received them without question. He didn’t want her to feel uncomfortable in the nude.
“Thank you,” Emilia said.
Her voice was even and respectful. He gave her a smile of acknowledgement, and then turned away from her. He let out a boorish yawn while he threw his own shirt over himself. It was one of those mornings after all.
“I’m going to draw up a bath,” Emilia said further, taking her clothes and covering herself. She tip-toed quietly over to the bathroom. “I won’t be too long,” she added, “I promise.”
He nodded away from her as she closed the bathroom door behind her. Surely enough, it had been some time since they had been able to wash themselves. She was no doubt craving a nice bath. He would take one later; for now, he had to figure out a few things.
One was the newfound relationship he had formed with the beautiful half-elf who bathed so innocently in the bathroom next to him. How on earth he managed to swing that, he would never know. All he knew was this week had been one of completely tumultuous emotion: of depression, sadness, happiness, and pure bliss. It was, quite simply put, insane. He could hear said half-elf singing happily in the bathroom as she enjoyed herself. She no doubt was experiencing the same ill-begotten and wonderful emotions as he was, although she seemed to be taking it better than he was. He smiled at the beauty of her voice. While she wasn’t necessarily the best singer, he could still listen to her sweet sound forever. He adored her that much.
Truthfully, he hadn’t forgotten all those who were lost, and he still silently mourned them as he would until the end of his days. But if he didn’t move on, he would no doubt lose his mind. So, because of this, he kept them tucked deeply within the confines of his heart, and Emilia at the front. It would be the only real way he could continue living like this, as selfish as that was.
And then there was the problem of money: real world problems came back to haunt him in this new world he found himself locked in. From the pouch of his pants, he withdrew a small sack of coins. Dumping them on the table, he grimaced as he looked at them. Subaru counted openly with mock enthusiasm, dropping each blessed gold coin unceremoniously back into the pouch. They hadn’t nearly enough for what they were to go about to do. They would require a lot more gold than that if they were going to make it all the way to Priestella. Even more so, the amount to charter a ship away from Lugnica would no doubt cost them a small fortune. What could they do to make some more gold? It was a predicament, that’s for sure. He didn’t want to put himself in any more harm’s way than he should, being he now had to treat life as one normally would, although there was good money in mercenary work. They had more skill and fighting power than the regular passerby, but still, he did not know where to look for such work.
He tossed the unpleasantly empty coin pouch on the table. The presence of Emilia drew his gaze, she who was just exiting the bathroom, obviously finished with her short bath. Hot steam poured from the room she had come from; he wouldn’t pry on how she managed to heat the bath right now. She stood in front of him, drying her long silver hair with a towel. She wore her typical outfit, adorned with her signature small flower clip in her hair, and the dulled small green emerald, supposedly containing Puck, hung at the base of her collarbone.
“You look so beautiful, Emilia,” Subaru said.
Sometimes her beauty captivated him so much. He couldn’t really find the words to express it. The half-elf herself smiled at him, evidently pleased with his reaction.
“Thank you, Subaru,” she replied.
There were shy, pink hues flaring upon her cheeks. Her compliment had stirred her, he was certain of that. He walked over to her, taking her hand in his.
“Are you ready,” he said, “to continue our journey to Priestella?” “Yes, let us go,” answered the half-elf.
Emilia gave him her best bright smile once more. And after he took the coin pouch from the table, the two walked out the door to their room. The tavern was still all but asleep, as only a few souls were out and about in the main hall: some were already enjoying a nice drink, no less. The bartender was fast at work, cleaning mugs and dishes in preparation for the day.
Subaru waved his thanks to him once again, and the bartender raised an empty mug to him in silent acknowledgement. As the two exited The Dancing Dragon, they were graced with a hazy morning which still bore the glistening remnants of dew all across the village grass. It was a quiet morning, with very few travellers about. Some brave merchants were saddling up their ground-dragons, prepping to take advantage of the light travel and make a mornings trade run to the neighbouring Ladrima. Other than this, the main road was relatively vacant and abandoned. The sun had just barely begun its shy ascension over the large thistle trees, blanketing the village in a low orange hue. Hand in hand, Emilia and Subaru kept to themselves as they made for the village exit, the former once again donning her cloak to hide her half-elven ears. Unfortunate as it was, it would be best if they avoided attention this morning. And after a few minutes of quiet marching, a small sign caught the attention of Subaru. ‘Weapons and Wares’, it read.
They did need supplies; or at least Subaru required some sort of weapon, so they might ably defend themselves on the perilous road to Priestella. It would be unwise if they travelled there unarmed. He wouldn’t mind purchasing a cloak for himself either, or maybe some sturdier clothes more suitable for the rigours of travel. It goes without saying, he pondered humorously, his current Earthling attire wasn’t the best for avoiding the attention of the common-folk.
Pointing his finger to the small shop, Subaru led Emilia inside of the humble abode.
What awaited them inside was a rather simple store, with basic armaments ranging from swords to axes, cloaks, travelling equipment, and other fine leathers hanging on the wall available for interested buying customers. Looking closer at the pieces, the items looked to be of rather high quality.
“Welcome, good sir!” the shop owner greeted, receiving the pair enthusiastically as they entered. “Would I be able to interest you young adventurers in some of my fine wares?” He pointed to the vast assortment of weapons on the wall.
Subaru paused momentarily in thought, before responding. “I’m looking for a simple sword,” he said, “something low-key which doesn’t bring a lot of attention to myself.” He pointed to a medium-sized blade adorned with leather grip, plain pommel and simple cross guard. It looked perfect. “May I hold it, sir?” he asked.
“Most certainly,” the shopkeeper agreed as he carefully removed the blade from the wall. He handed it to Subaru with one hand on the flat and the other on the handle.
Taking the blade from the man, he noticed it was devilishly light and balanced for such a well-sized blade. Running his finger over it, he accidentally cut himself as his finger glossed the edge of it. It was very sharp indeed.
“Careful now,” the shopkeeper advised, and then he continued, saying, “All of my blades here were forged in the Holy Kingdom of Guesteko, so they are of the highest quality.” He was quite proud of his work.
Subaru asked, “How much gold coins does a blade of this make run?” “Around,” the shopkeeper replied, “let’s say, thirty gold pieces.” “Thirty gold pieces?” Subaru replied, shocked.
He didn’t have nearly enough to afford such a weapon.
Noticing his surprise, the man took the blade back from Subaru and hung it back on the wall. “I’m afraid so,” he replied sorrowfully.
He assumed the owner was scorning them for touching expensive merchandise without enough paying means. Emilia watched Subaru drop his shoulders in resignation. He recognized they were, in fact, very poor. From behind, she took his right hand in her left and gave it a gentle squeeze of reassurance. He flinched and briefly turned to meet her soft gaze. He then turned back toward the shopkeeper who was tending to his work again, already deciding he had lost yet another customer.
“I don’t have enough,” he admitted.
And in his disappointment, he turned on his heel and led Emilia out the door, allowing the door slam on their way out.
“Come back soon!” the shopkeeper called insincerely, continuing his work alone.
As the pair stepped out of the shop, Subaru cursed. “We can’t live like this,” he said. “We need money, but how?”
In the past, Roswaal L. Mathers had taken care of their monetary needs, supplying them with all they needed, unsolicited or not. The Mathers mansion was an absolute treasure trove of gold, gear, and any provision one could imagine. Almost literally, in fact. And cut off from their primary source of income, they had to find alternative ways to make it in this cruel world. He peered a glancing look to Emilia. She stood there quietly next to him. The half-elf understood their need for money and his frustration, much like most of the struggling people of Lugnica. It was a normalcy they had been fortunately unexposed to until now.
Suddenly, his thoughts were cut short by a violent, piercing scream coming from the west, alerting nearly the entire village from its strength. The common settlers opened up the wood flaps of their windows to see what the commotion was.
“Over by the river?” Emilia asked.
She pointed in the direction from whence it came. Such a terrible scream meant only one thing. Understanding the brevity of the situation, he decided to act swiftly. He grasped her hand hard.
“Let’s go!” he said.
So the two hurried quickly across an isolated green meadow, itself separate from the main portion of the village and the docks. The village itself was completely encircled by a wall for protection, save for a portion which bordered the west riverbank. Therein lay a small dock used by fishing boats and transportation ships to ferry people to and from the opposite sides of the river. By now, many different commoners had come outside to see what had occurred, and others were already running in the direction of the volatile scream. After a moment’s time, Subaru and Emilia noticed a frenzied man running toward them with blood splattered violently over his torso.
“Oh, god!” he cried hysterically, holding out bloody hands. “Oh, god! Oh, god! Look at this: my daughter, she’s all over me! The monster took her! It took her to the riverbank. She’s gone, she’s gone, she’s gone!”
The man repeated this over and over, undoubtedly losing his mind. He finally collapsed from sorrow in front of Subaru and Emilia, sobbing uncontrollably. Emilia just held him, and decided it was best not to pry any longer. She looked up at Subaru with worried, innocent eyes.
Subaru nodded in understanding. “I’ll go take a look,” he said. As he turned toward the docks, he heard a voice call out:
“Wait, boy!”
He turned to face the crowd gathered around the father. And there he saw the shopkeeper from earlier, now holding the blade he had chosen in his hand. He approached Subaru and held out the blade by the spine, offering the weapon to the boy.
“Here, take this,” he said. “It would be unwise to face such a devilish creature unarmed. As brave as you may be, boy.”
Whether his neutral expression meant he had changed his opinion about the couple, or perhaps it was just a sympathetically pragmatic choice given the circ*mstances: Subaru had neither the time nor desire to find out. Taking it by the pommel, he offered him a nod of appreciation instead.
“I wish you luck,” the shopkeeper said.
With his hands firmly grasping the blade, Subaru tested its weight. It was perfect. He was no veteran warrior by any means, but he had more than basic understanding of how to use a sword due to his ungainly training with Wilhelm van Astrea. Lowering the finely crafted, but humbly decorated weapon to his side, he turned back toward the docks, and then took off running.
But when he began to approach the docks, he felt a cold chill take his body. It was nervousness, he assumed: a normal thing to have in the face of death and danger. However, now it was different: he really had to be careful. He could no longer use Return by Death to cheat the normal fragility of life. He now had gone back to being merely a mortal human, but that didn’t mean he was as useless as his past self in times of danger.
The docks themselves were worn down by the murky river upon which they rest upon. This settlement had been here far longer than the village itself. The wooden foundation had rotten beyond recognition. He wondered how it stood there without collapsing. Wordless he approached carefully, paying close attention to the sounds of the environment. Other than the slow, easy swaying of the river’s water, he could hear nothing else. A freshly spilt blood trail led from the base of the docks all the way down to the edge, where a solemn boat danced up and down against the river’s sway. No doubt that was the father’s boat, and this blood trail had belonged to his unfortunate daughter. The beast had evidently escaped with her, and there would be no rescue party sent for her. The amount of blood let here was obscene. Subaru doubted sorrowfully a human could survive such a devastating wound. As he stepped carefully over the rotted dock, the trail ended in a larger-than-normal pool of blood next to the vacant boat itself. He knelt down next to it to get a closer look, noticing it had the characteristic bright red hues of arterial blood: meaning the victim would’ve long since succumbed to their injuries even if they managed to escape.
Grimacing, Subaru stood up and stepped over the gore to inspect the empty boat. It only had a few fishing tools in it and not much else. Nothing here was evidence enough of who or what conducted such a merciless attack. It was probably some ancient demon beast, he figured. Twisted spawns of witches were generally the causes for Lugnica’s random disappearances.
The water’s soothing back-and-forth roll contrasted heavily with the brutal and gruesome scene which had played out at this very location. Subaru sighed heavily to himself. The creature—whatever it was—had been brazen enough to strike just after sunrise. It was confident of its capability to escape without unwanted attention, and its strike was swift enough to take a victim into the water with no resistance. Understandably, with no tracks, bite marks, or anything worthy to identify the creature, the investigative process would be almost impossible to push through. And Subaru thought himself in over his head. Now a father was without his daughter, and no justice or peace would be brought to him. He didn’t have anything to bury, or any hope for justice enacted upon a completely unwarranted murder. It was a terrible predicament all around, and he could do nothing to help it.
Soft footsteps approached quietly from behind. Subaru stood pensively on the bloodied dock. Turning to face the newcomer, he came face to face with a worried Emilia. Her soft silver bangs blew gently in the morning breeze, and she stood silently just off the docks. She, too, eyed the blood worryingly.
“This is horrible,” Emilia said, covering her mouth with her hand.
The smell of death in the air was profuse, and she resisted the urge to take herself away from the area immediately. But still, she stayed.
“Yeah,” he replied.
Nothing else really needed to be said.
He turned around with his sword still in his hand, useless now as it was. The creature was long gone, and with it, an innocent girl’s life.
“What should we do now, Subaru?” asked Emilia. “I don’t know,” he replied.
“But we can’t let the monster do this,” she continued evenly. “This attack wasn’t the first time. Another girl was even taken last week, the villagers told me.”
Carefully, Subaru walked silently off the dock. Emilia continued looking at him with all the concern and worry she gave to everyone’s plight. He knew she cared so deeply about everyone. She wished only for the betterment of all who lived in this land. She was self- sacrificing, a trait which was equally a virtue and a vice. He pondered this, and then suddenly, he came to an understanding: She truly is special, he thought.
The sun now shone brightly down from above as it began to make its pass over the sky and through the fluffy clouds. There was a soft breeze in the air, much out of the ordinary with their current situation.
“There’s a bounty on the monster,” she added, in hopes to regain his interest. It must have worked because Subaru stopped immediately in his tracks. “Four-hundred gold Lugnica marks is the reward. So I heard from one of the villagers.”
“Oh, is that so?” he asked, turning slightly toward her. “This isn’t the first time the monster had attacked. So, he’s a repeat offender, eh?”
She nodded gingerly to him, saying, “Yes. Just last week, another woman was taken from the shore of this riverbank, just a little way to the south from here. She too was taken without a trace, they told me. The villagers had suspected she had drowned in the water, but now their concerns are much graver than that.”
“I see,” he said, frowning and motioning for her to come. “That changes things a bit. Let’s go and speak with the village head about this bounty.”
She smiled to him, unmistakably happy she had convinced him to help the villagers. The gold was selfishly important to them, she knew, but aiding those who were in grave danger took precedence over such things.
Subaru’s frown curved to a small smile out of view of Emilia. Although it seemed they were pursuing down a dangerous path, given his apparent lack of Return by Death, he still found himself a little bit excited for some adventure. He would have to plan carefully from now on, instead of running headfirst into battles they clearly could not win. This was life or death now, as obvious of an ultimatum as that was. It had been some time since he legitimately feared death, and now, he felt the pangs of mortality nipping ever so diligently at his shoulder.
As the pair walked slowly back to the main village, he looked back at his half-elf companion. She followed silently behind him, but he motioned for her to come walk side-by-side with himself, extending an open palm for her to grasp. She happily nodded and picked up her pace, linking her hand to his, walking next to one another now. She was his partner, and he needed her by his side. She gave him a loving smile, and he returned a nonchalant grin himself. He had to be strong for her because she was so strong for him. She was so kind- hearted, and it was her nature to help others in need, and she couldn’t just sit idly by and let a beast instil such fear in this little village. No, Emilia hadn’t really changed. Even though she had matured and come to grips with her emotions and self, more than she had before, she still was Emilia at heart. She was the good-natured, well-mannered and benevolent girl whose only drive was to bring happiness and prosperity to the world, even if people didn’t want it from her. She faced such animosity simply because she was a half-elf. It infuriated him. It was sad; and for that, he would support her in anything she wanted to do.
Soon, the two had approached a much grander building than most other establishments surrounding it, located at the very centre of the village. It was odd to see such contrast: its exterior was well-decorated with luxurious designs similar to Lugnica royalty. The closer they neared, they noticed the grand entrance to the long hall was blocked off by two guards.
“Halt!” the guards boomed, raising their armaments. They signalled the pair to cease movement. “What business does a boy who carries an unsheathed sword, and a girl, donning a witch-like cloak, have with Neryemar, village head of Nicia?”
Stepping back slightly at the less-than-warm welcome, Subaru suddenly realized walking around with an unsheathed sword probably wasn’t the best of ideas. Keeping his blade low, he extended out a hand in a gesture of peace. “We have come to speak about the bounty and the monster which plagues your village,” he exclaimed, while offering them to lower their weapons. “We’re not here to cause trouble. We mean your village no harm.”
The guards, still curious about their strange guests, slowly lowered their weapons. One of them said, “You have a strange look about you for monster hunters. Don’t take you for much.”
“Looks can be deceiving,” Subaru replied, holding out his weapon for them to disarm him.
The guard took his sword from him, and they let the two pass by without further incident.
And after a short time, the pair found themselves in a longhall standing before a lordly man sitting upon a false throne. Other than appearances, Neryemar of Nicia wasn’t a lord by any means. He wasn’t bestowed any titles of nobility by any king or monarchy. Even still, he held himself to a higher regard than most others, as one of high taste and high respectability, even if it might not have been real or authentic.
He eyed the pair carefully who stood so brazenly in his halls. He hadn’t called for any meeting with them, nor had he ever heard or seen the likes of them in his village before. He was, quite simply, irritated they had found themselves sharing his very company. The guards who stood watch behind the unusual pair continued to gaze mindlessly ahead. No one had said a word since their arrival.
Neryemar decided he would break their silence:
“Why, pray tell, have you come before me?” he asked, scratching the scruff of his beard with one hand, and toying with a wine glass in the other, “What can I do for two younglings no older than my son or daughter? I have pressing matters to attend to mind you both. Please do not waste my time with any foolishness or game.”
The boy in question stepped forward at the lordly man’s beckon. “We are here,” he said, “about the monster attacks which have plagued your village as of late. We would offer our services in return for the bounty, which is what we have come to discuss. We also wouldn’t mind any other leads you might have based on the prior attacks.”
“Ah, I see,” Neryemar said, snorting. He eyed Subaru amusingly. “So, are these two the warriors who I must send to deal with this menace? Not a Kingdom Knight, or a member of the Royal Guard, are you? No, I didn’t think as much. What services can a boy and a girl such as yourself offer me?”
“See, that’s where you’re wrong,” Subaru said, chiding the pseudo-lord. “My partner here is a renowned user of the spirit-arts, one who can manipulate the surrounding spirits of this land to cast all manner of magic. And I. Well, I am a knight, although I will not give you my name, nor my companion’s. We wish to keep our identities in secret.”
Emilia stood by, withholding a devious smirk. She decided it would be wise to let Subaru do the bargaining, as he had become quite good at it.
The village head nodded in firm understanding, clearly easy to convince and perhaps more than a little desperate, despite appearances. Standing up from his gold-studded chair, he opened a small chest near the base of his desk and withdrew a moderate coin pouch from it. He plopped it down on the desk without much care or thought.
“One-hundred gold marks in advance pay,” he stated, taking a long sip of wine from his jewel adorned cup, “and three-hundred more for a job well done. Bring me the head of the beast. I want it mounted on my wall as decoration for its misdeeds.”
Taking the healthy gold pouch from the wood carved table, Subaru smiled as he gripped it in his hand. “I’ll bring you its head,” he said, pausing to take a seat in front of the man now that he had gotten his full and honourable attention. “Now, let’s talk about the previous attacks.
Do you have any information which could help us in our search for the creature?”
“Certainly, if you wish,” Neryemar said with a scowl, taking another long draw of wine from his cup, rendering it empty. He motioned for the servant adjacent to him to refill it, who did so promptly. “The first sighting was not but a fortnight ago. Down by the riverbank, a scouting patrol noticed something sneaking around mischievously on the opposite side of the river. They didn’t think much of it then, but it seemed to be something out of the ordinary, so a notice was put out in the village to tread carefully after dark. However, the first attack came just before dawn the following week.” He retrieved a bloody ruby necklace from the desk drawer and tossed it on the table. “This belonged to the victim: a young woman no older than twenty years. It wasn’t a calculated killing or robbery, as this medallion is quite valuable, so we suspected foul action. Nor was a body ever found, just blood, gore and savagery. We kept it under hush to the rest of the village as to not cause panic. However, judging by today’s attack, it seems our little beast has a penchant for young women and strikes once a week, just at the break of dawn. Quite a simple thing to be understood, really.”
“So, the beast has done this many times,” Subaru said, “and it even has a methodology to his work, huh.” He rubbed his temple. “Thank you for the information, sir,” he said after a moment’s silence. He made sure to accentuate the politeness of his address at the end.
The nobleman snorted, saying, “It goes without question the beast has some capability.” He swished the wine in his cup back and forth rhythmically, before continuing with a darker, more sombre tone: “I sent a scouting patrol across the riverbank to search for the missing woman, but they never returned. Since then, I have sent envoys to the capital to request help from the Kingdom Knights, yet none have returned as well. I fear the worst for them, and it keeps us all but cut off from the aid of others.”
“So, it’s that bad, then,” Subaru replied.
This situation was worse than he had previously thought. It was no simple beast they were dealing with, no. This was clearly something more: a demon beast for sure.
The lordly man scoffed darkly. “Oh yes,” he said, “these kinds of monsters are unfortunately all too common in these remote areas. The undisturbed nature of the surrounding area gives them ample grounds for breeding and nesting without problem.”
Subaru sighed heavily to himself; this was indeed a mess. Surprisingly, Emilia stepped up. Her soft, gentle voice broke the thoughts of the two engaged men.
“Sir, if I may question you so,” she said evenly. “Why hasn’t Priestella sent for aid? You are under the water city’s umbrella of protection, are you not?” Her penchant for concern was laden in her worried voice. She stared at the man with vibrant amethyst eyes; not that he could see them through her magic cloak.
Neryemar frowned at this question. “Regrettably, no,” he said gravely. “There have been unfortunate taxation and trade disputes recently. Priestella has since banished Nicia from the realm. Even though we are well within their boundaries, we are indeed now a lone village without a banner. Although I pride myself on our independence, we simply do not have the swords needed for hunting dangerous monsters such as this.”
“That is most unfortunate,” Emilia replied.
Unfortunate such petty quarrels existed in such a civilized land as Lugnica was. With such dangerous creatures prowling around, all settlements required adequate protection to keep peace for its people.
“Indeed,” he replied evenly, drinking from his cup pensively, “but that is of no matter. We still can request aid from the capital, but I fear the beast is snatching our envoys from the road. It’s intelligent, that much is sure.”
“We understand,” Subaru nodded, adding his thanks. “We deeply appreciate the information. We’ll do our best to take care of it.” Sticking the fat money pouch into his pocket, he stood to take his leave.
“Just one more thing,” Neryemar added, his expression growing dark and serious. “Be careful if you go beyond the wood across from the riverbank. There are things much worse than these beasts out there. Do not trust anyone and keep your wits about you.”
Subaru nodded. “You have my thanks for the warning,” he said. “We will try to keep our heads alert.”
Neryemar raised his jewelled cup to the pair in a toast of good-will. He said, “To your success and good health, I bid you farewell.”
Nodding his own thanks one final time, Subaru collected his weapon from the guard, and together he and Emilia walked toward the exit of the village head’s quarters. The nobleman watched them carefully, and with a curious suspicion, took one final sip from his cup.
Subaru gazed comfortably out into the dimly-lit horizon, the distant lights of Nicia twinkling in the far-off distance. Dusk was falling now, blanketing them in shadow. In front of him rest a roaring fire, crackling with life, whose flames provided a much-needed warmth to offset the cool air of the night. On the opposite side of the fire sat Emilia, who drew her small, pale hands closer to the flame to help stifle the chilly environment. Now they rested just across the river, having ferried over it quite some time ago, on the edge of the old, dark forest which they had been so warned about. What surrounded them was nothing but wilderness, with a few ruins and craggy, long-forgotten remnants of castles which were abandoned some time ago. However, the night was nothing but peaceful, as they hadn’t had any sighting of the so- called monster which they were hunting.
As a frosty gust of wind blew between the two, the fire roared just as fiercely in response, each element feeding on each other. Emilia shivered and drew her hands closer to the empowered fire. She now wore more accommodating attire, indeed fit for travel and adventure. She was covered from head-to-toe in high quality leather: a pair of brown leather jackboots, with a cotton-white long sleeve undershirt, and a simple leather jerkin over the top of it. Subaru likewise wore a similar studded leather jerkin and undershirt. A newly-acquired scabbard housed his blade, hanging from his brown belt. A matched pair of warm, bountiful green cloaks covered them to keep the elements at bay.
They had procured a number of useful supplies using their advance pay. The shopkeeper from earlier also allowed Subaru to keep the blade he had given him. His hopes were he would indeed slay the monster plaguing the village, reasoning it had ruined his business, and he wanted nothing short of it being rid of. Let the sword’s price be his investment into this quest, he said to him.
The two sat quietly, wondering how they would slay the monster they had set out to kill. Truthfully enough, he had wondered about Emilia and her elusive spirit, Puck. He had been meaning to ask her about it, but he truly did not want to pry any more than he had to. It was just earlier, he struggled to light the fire in front of them with a flint and tinder. She giggled as his attempt met failure time after time, and then what followed amazed him. He had seen her snap her fingers together, whisper something: and from the tip of her finger conjured a small flame to light the wood, giving him an idea how she warmed the bath from earlier.
So, she can cast magic without Puck, Subaru thought. “Hey, Emilia. I have a question,” he said, breaking the comfortable silence. He fingered the pommel of his blade as he continued. “How is it that you can cast magic without Puck now?”
It was brief but straightforward.
Emilia looked down slightly as she heard him, uncharacteristically nervous to respond. After a moment, she met eyes with him. “Well, I don’t really understand it myself,” she said.
Subaru looked at her, slightly confused. “For some reason, I’ve recalled some things over the past few days. And from these recollections I found I can use magic on my own. I’m not sure why, or how, but something happened the night we escaped the Sanctuary. I’m sorry if that is not a good answer.”
“No,” he replied, “that was a fine one.”
The half-elf nervously toyed with the lifeless, dull crystal which rested at the base of her chest. She said, “I haven’t been able to contact Puck for a long time now. I hope he did not break his contract with me.” Her weakened voice trailed off as she finished.
Noticing her worry over Puck, Subaru stood and walked over to her, before taking a seat right next to by her side. Reassuringly, he reached an arm around her in a small but meaningful gesture.
“Don’t worry, Emilia,” he said to her. His voice was comforting, and the girl retreated into his embrace, enjoying his much-needed company. “I’m sure Puck is okay, wherever he is, and I’m sure he has his reasons.”
“May it be so,” she said, snuggling into his safe, warm confines.
She missed Puck, but what she had lost in their father-daughter relationship, she had more than gained in her newfound love with Subaru. That didn’t keep her from worrying about him, however. He was all she knew for the many young years of her long life, and she just wanted to make sure he was okay. If indeed he broke his contract with her, then at the very least she wanted to understand why he had done so. Puck had made a promise to her; she knew he would keep it.
Subaru didn’t quite know what Emilia was going through internally, but he held her tight anyway. She had been there so many times for him in his dark moments; this was the least he could offer her. And so, he just held her even tighter, protecting her in his own special way.
“Hey, Emilia?” he said, gently brushing her bangs from her eyes. She looked up to him, with vibrant eyes of purple. “I’m happy to be with you,” he continued. It was simple, but true.
He saw her flinch. His raw, plain words must have filled her with emotion. “Me too,” she said at length.
Her voice was barely above a whisper, but he understood it perfectly anyway. She had buried her face in his arms, and the two sat cozily by the fire for quite some time, enjoying the clear night sky. During their embrace, Subaru spent his time counting the twinkling sea of stars above, watching the full moon shine ever watchful over them like a comforting beacon in the dark. It was so easy to enjoy time like this in the presence of Emilia. He didn’t mind the small, meaningful moments he would remember forever. In fact, it was these moments he cherished more above all else. Though it was true he still craved adventure to some degree.
With her by his side, he wouldn’t have any issue with settling down somewhere quiet, undisturbed by the passages of time. If only it were possible.
Emilia’s breath was evenly paced, but never did she sleep. Tonight wasn’t the night for that. No, unfortunately they had business to attend to. But for now, she would just enjoy the tranquillity of this sweet moment. The two shared this innocent embrace by a warm, toasty fire, undisturbed by the happenings of the world.
Sheer chance did not bring them together like this, nor was it happenstance she was growing to love her shared time with Subaru. Although the pain and suffering the two had endured was insurmountable; and all of those they had lost still pained them, she still felt blessed to be held by him.
Some time had passed before the last few dying embers of the flame began to burn out, leaving just the hazy charcoaled ash which blew out with one hefty gust of wind. It was by then the two decided they would set out into the dark unknowns of the wood awaiting them. Preparing their equipment and gathering their wits about them, the two took a route off the beaten path, one which clearly had long since been abandoned.
Soon, they were absorbed into the mass of trees. The immense, sprawling redwoods, clearly older than any living mortal, hung over them, ready to claim its dying prey. Long, thick, grey moss cascaded from their winding branches, and their massive roots jutted up out of the ground, giving the impressions of giant soldiers standing above ground. Subaru kept his hand prepared and ready on the pommel of his sword as the two moved carefully throughout the unknowns of the ancient wood. It was eerily quiet. Too quiet. Lifeless, almost, as if all the residents of the forest fled from it long ago. Emilia kept pace quietly behind him, alert and ready if anything dangerous would come to pass. However, despite the two moving deeper and deeper into the mystical wood, nothing came. By now, they were quite a ways into the woodland, without seeing a single solitary sign of life. It was peculiar, and just
utterly strange. The atmosphere was thick and heavy, as if gravity was heavier here than all other places. The air was hot and humid, and the persistent breeze from earlier was nowhere to be found. It was an odd sensation to say the least, as if they had stepped into another world entirely.
Taking a seat on one of the twisted sprawling roots, Subaru sighed to himself. “I don’t understand what’s going on here,” he said, scratching his chin in thought. “There’s nothing here.”
It was worse than that, really. There was less than nothing.
Nests nestling deeply in the jagged holes of the oaks had long since been abandoned. The intricate roots looping in and out and around, which should be ripe for shelter of all kinds, lay devoid of all life. There weren’t even any insects crawling around in this forest, nor were they buzzing obnoxiously in Subaru’s ear as they always did. The forest was just completely devoid of life.
Everything was gone.
Emilia looked down at Subaru worryingly, meeting his eyes with hers. She was clearly uneasy in both her movements and expression. Something was bothering her, but he didn’t quite know what.
“I don’t think we should be here any longer,” she said to him quietly, taking his hand. “We should go back to the edge of the forest.”
“What’s wrong, Emilia?” he asked.
“I couldn’t quite feel it before, but I think this place is cursed,” she said, gently squeezing his hand before continuing. “By whom or what, I don’t know. But we need to leave, now, before we become cursed as well.”
“A curse?” he asked,
He recalled the black magic which was cast upon him, causing the deaths of his friend and himself. He stood immediately at the remembrance of such an aberration. And now that he was made aware of it, he could feel its odd presence too. That was the weight which he felt pushing down upon him, difficult to explain with words. Nevertheless, they needed to get away from here and fast. So hand in hand, the two went quickly toward the exit of the cursed forest. So as they ran, they could feel the woods on either side of them quickly becoming thicker and denser than it had been before. The trees were larger, growing in response to their fear; one dangerously hovered over Subaru’s shoulder, waiting to strike. The faster they ran, the further it felt as if the exit was growing away from them.
Something was warping their senses. Subaru thought it to be foul magic. Even so, it couldn’t be real; it was all just in their heads, and so he kept up the pace. He had felt such evil magics before, ones which warped his senses like so. Any minute now, they should be through the clearing and out into the grey meadow before the river. He could feel Emilia gripping his hand so tightly, the whites of her knuckles were showing now. He realized she was scared, more scared than he was.
“Dammit!” he cursed. A panic began to weigh his voice. “Where is it? Where is the exit?”
It had to be close by now. They had been running for what felt like an eternity, covering a distance far longer than the one they had traversed during their careful walk through the forest. Either time or space was being manipulated, or their senses were being distorted. It could be one or the other, but it didn’t matter.
And then suddenly, without warning, he crashed through what felt like a pane of thick solid glass. Shattering the spell, they broke through and fell near the base of the forest. Crashing to the dirt unexpectedly, something gripped his throat as if he were being suffocated, choking the life from his body in a slow and torturous way. He scrambled in terror, holding his pounding chest and constricted throat. Emilia crawled over to him. With panic painted on her face, she leaned over him to see what was wrong. Placing her palm on his chest, she whispered some incantation frantically to herself. There was a small, humming sound, and a faint warm light emanated from the palm of her hand. The soothing warmth spread over his body, and she could see the excited rise and fall of his chest slowly return to normal.
Subaru lay there, and with Emilia still on top of him, he felt around his throat to gauge if he was still struggling to breathe. Now that it was gone, he realized what he was doing, and he relaxed himself. Feeling the cool air pass through his lungs yet again, he breathed a deep sigh of relief.
“What the hell was that?” he asked.
He noticed Emilia leaning over him, evidently fraught with worry over his state of being. Her eyes were glistening with small tears, and she held him with such care and devotion it surprised even him.
She was scared to lose him. He was the last person she had in this world, as sad as that may sound. He cursed himself silently for terrifying her like he did. He would do his best to be more careful next time, he decided. Yet again, he went into a situation he couldn’t yet handle by himself, and almost got himself killed. It was a bad habit he had to be sure.
“Somebody must have placed a curse over the entire woods,” Emilia said, hugging him in desperation. She was emotional as her voice fluctuated rapidly. “I’m so sorry I didn’t notice soon enough. I’m so sorry, Subaru!”
Her sorrow in this moment was palpable.
“Figures it was a curse,” he sighed, wrapping his arms around the panicked half-elf. “Hey, Emilia, you didn’t do anything wrong. Come on, it’s okay.”
She was distraught. He tried to calm her down, to reassure her he was okay, but it was difficult. In essence, she really didn’t do anything wrong, but it was Emilia’s natural behaviour to blame herself for things not of her fault. He was more to blame for this than herself. She didn’t know any better, and it was wrong to let her shoulder such things alone.
“No,” she replied, tightening her grip on Subaru. “As a magic user, I should be able to detect something like that. We should never have made it so far inside. It was almost too late: any longer, and we would have become cursed as well.”
He figured it was something sort of like that. Once they had busted out of the confines of the curse, something akin to a safeguard activated, probably to keep people from escaping.
However, for some reason, it didn’t have the devastating effect whoever casted it would have liked. Or maybe it did, and Emilia just prevented it from spreading in time. He guessed he had taken the brunt of the spell because he was in front of Emilia when they broke through the barrier.
“What a weird experience that was,” he said, holding his chest. His hectic breathing quickly returned to normal. “Who would be powerful enough to place a curse on an entire forest?”
Emilia shook her head. “I don’t know,” she said, “but maybe it could be the one responsible for the attacks on the townspeople?”
“Possibly,” Subaru said in agreement. “There’s no doubt these past events are connected to one another.”
It was certainly suspect. A curse on an entire forest, envoys going missing, and people being snatched away from their homes, never to be seen again. This sounded like something to do with the Witch Cult. They were a devious and most disgusting band of freaks, that’s for sure. However, there was a possibility this had nothing to do with them at all.
Whatever the case may be, someone was going to great lengths to keep people out of that forest, and for what reason Subaru didn’t even want to guess. No doubt something sinister was happening, and it was happening right under the noses of the Kingdom Knights of Lugnica and Priestella.
“At any rate,” he said, running his hand through his hair, “we should return back to the village and share with Neryemar the knowledge we have gained from this.” Standing up, he gathered himself, shaking off the haunt of death which threatened him yet again. He then uttered, “This may be bigger than just a mere monster taking people from the river.”
Emilia nodded in agreement, gathering herself as well.
With such a powerful curse like that over a wood stretching for miles, it’s unlikely a simple demon beast was responsible. The more likely culprit would be someone more of Roswaal L. Mathers’ calibre: a powerful mage or sorcerer who had both the skill and power to perform such an incantation. To be able to manipulate time and space like that and to such a degree; Emilia had never seen such power before, let alone witnessed it firsthand and even nearly become a victim of it. It was an experience she would not like to take part in again.
It was still relatively early into the morning, probably a few hours past midnight. They had to return to the village and warn them of what happened. After a moment’s time, they began to cross over the hill and down into the clearing by the riverbank.
And far off into the distance, they could see a heavy smoke blanketing the horizon. “No way,” Subaru uttered quietly.
He couldn’t believe what he was seeing.
Where the once bustling and prosperous village of Nicia used to be, was in its place a blazing, seething fire, which consumed the entire village in devastation. Its inferno was so bright it pierced the darkened night sky for miles upon miles of land.
“Oh, no,” Emilia whispered, her face contorted heavily in disbelief.
She held onto Subaru as they witnessed the destruction of the village they had left just moments ago.
And above the carnage and destruction, the moon still hung brilliantly over the fire blazing below it: all of it reflecting calmly onto the peacefully flowing river.
Chapter 3: Against the Grain of Tragedy
Chapter Text
Before the weight of their ineluctable toil eluded him no more, Subaru suddenly realized they were probably making a very grave mistake. Every instinct he had was screaming at himself to paddle downstream, not across it as they were.
Run away, he told himself over and over. But against his turmoil and destruction of the self, he gritted his teeth, furrowed his brow, and continued wading through the boggy water, drawing a line through the line of water which separated the two hells. Their boat rocked against the wind-stricken waters. To his back lay the cursed wood, and to his front remained nought but a solemn memory of a village once teeming with life, sad*stically reduced to ruin. He then looked back for a moment, suddenly realizing why he acted so contradictory of himself: in a race against time, Emilia was paddling just as furiously as he.
Something odd bit at him: the futility of her hope, was what it was. She clung desperately to it like how a child would to her mother. It was a small, feeble hope that maybe—just maybe
—they could save at least one life amongst the ruins, while unwittingly risking their own in the process. Subaru knew better of it, but even so, he could not garner the courage to speak up. Such destruction was something beyond their capability to alter, and the past could not so easily be undone like it had been before. It was his fault, he figured. Still, Emilia did not know about his former power, nor would he ever let the idea of it escape his lips again.
Their wooden dinghy bobbed clumsily up and down, struggling to find its way across the water. They were almost to the other side of the river now, close enough to feel the heat of the burning village and clear enough to see burning ashes and embers permeating the darkness around them with small speckles of light. The everlasting moon above was now hidden, blanketed in a thick, sooty smoke, banishing its presence and allowing no betrayal through the night enshrouding them. However, the encroaching flames of the village began to envelop the area in all its ferocity, splashing horrid red paint against the dark canvas of the night. This was a queer thing to witness. The world took up an insidious red hue, almost like they had taken a wrong turn into some otherworldly hell. Even the usual murky green water reflected the devilish light in such a way it appeared to burn with both fury and ardour.
With Emilia behind him, Subaru bit back a curse, and against his own better instinct, refused to back down. As their creaking boat made one final lurch forward, it docked itself unceremoniously onto the bank of the river. Rotten wood met damp dirt. With sword in hand, Subaru jumped out of the dinghy, landing with a thud onto the riverbank. Behind him, Emilia stepped carefully out of the boat. He noticed her breathing was uneven, signifying her unease and distress. Wordlessly, she nodded to Subaru, and he returned the gesture in kind. Facing forward, he peered in the direction of the fire.
It was now or never. Soon, all which remained of the village would be the charred remnants of precious lives lost.
Staying low to the ground, Subaru cautiously approached a nearby bush to survey the area behind some sort of cover. Emilia was careful in following him, their pace matching almost step for step. He looked over the clearing, observing the raging bonfire which was the village of Nicia. It was lifeless, and apart from the rising heat which brought beads of sweat to his forehead, there wasn’t much else of note. The flames roared and crackled, the wooden settlements providing more than enough dry tinder for a healthy blaze. The air he took into his lungs became more and more polluted with each breath. They had to be quick if they were to do anything meaningful here.
Subaru narrowed his eyes. Beyond the clearing separating the village from the bedraggled harbour, there was a small, almost unnoticeable shuffle in the distance, vanishing just as quickly as it had appeared. It could be someone in need of help.
“Look, over there,” Emilia exclaimed.
She pointed at the same thing, her voice a whisper barely reaching his ear. It was too late to turn back now. Indeed, he was just as curious as anyone else would be in this situation— cruelly, more so than dread or pity. He wasn’t sure what could have caused the destruction of this place in such a short time, but a few likely candidates immediately came to mind.
But behind him, Emilia had strayed from Subaru’s side ever so slightly, her breathing laboured from the surrounding smoky haze. She strained herself not to cough and give away their presence; and then suddenly, in the distance between two burning and unrecognizable buildings, she could hear what sounded like a plea for help. Although it was difficult to hear through wild howl of the flames, she could still make out vague syllables. She focused herself on the direction of the faint voice, pulling her attention away from her surroundings. Preoccupied with the voice, she hadn’t realized Subaru had left her side some time ago.
Slowly, she approached the distant voice like this. She heard it again, clearer than it had been before. Something was not right, however, as the voice originating from the burning cottage in front of her had changed direction. Now it was much closer than before. Emilia froze, now focused on what was going on around her. She could hear heavy footsteps, too heavy to be Subaru’s. Her eyes of lilac widened as she felt a dark and sinister aura approaching her. Not to give herself away, she carefully prepared a small counter spell in her right hand. Her palm radiated faintly with a small flame. She would have to be quick with this.
And then came a sinister voice:
“What do we have here?” it asked.
Emilia turned to face the direction of it, but she was too late. A coarse, dirty hand covered her mouth, preventing her from speaking the incantation to finish the spell, and a knife brushed just over her neck. Her heart dropped, and she froze in terror against the bandit’s strong grasp. He was almost inhumanly strong, she felt. He wasn’t your normal rogue of the wilds, she quickly realized such. She could feel the coolness of the blade pressed firmly against her skin. The vagabond tightened his grip on her, making sure to stifle any attempted pleas for help.
She couldn’t make out her assailant quite clearly, but he appeared to be a younger man, maybe in his late twenties. His face eluded her, concealed under the confines of a dark hood.
“A half-witch whor*?” he whispered. He ran his coarse tongue over her pointy ear lustfully, before continuing. “What’s a precious little flower like yourself doing out here all alone, eh?”
Emilia flinched at the unwanted contact, but she dared not fight back with the dagger pressed so violently at her throat. The filthy man continued playing with her, feeling her maturing curves and softness up in places only one person was allowed access to. She felt violated.
Emilia bit her tongue and shut her eyes as the man touched her, so deliberately slowly, knowing and evidently enjoying this very fact. His putrid smell made her want to throw up, let alone the feel of his coarse and rotten hands.
“Now, missus,” he said darkly through the night air. “I haven’t felt one as soft as you in my short lifetime. My life may be ending soon, so just a little more, if I may?”
Emilia shut her eyes in resignation as he continued to feel her up. She could feel something she hadn’t felt for a long, long time. It was hatred, and it burned and swelled up deep inside her. She was nothing to this man other than a base tool for his pleasure. It had been this way all her life. She was just a worthless half-elf to the common folk, someone who had nought to offer but that of bad omen and ill fortune.
The indignities she suffered now, that he was perpetrating onto her, rung but a hollow bell toll through the ethical boundaries of humanity. Her feelings mattered not, and this made her feel such a thing as hate: more than she ever had before. With this thought, she opened her amethyst eyes. Where had Subaru gone she thought?
A sudden sharp pang in her heart knocked the air from her lungs.
No, they couldn’t have. He couldn’t be gone. She tried her best to banish the thought of losing Subaru from her mind, but she felt the heat of her tears welling anyway. It was too much to even consider. If she lost him: he, who meant the entire world to her. It was not a possibility. She would not fathom such an outcome. In her silence and dismay, she cursed herself for coming here. This was all her fault. If they had just left, leaving the swelling fires in their wake, none of this would have happened. Again, her natural inclination to help others superseded her better instinct of self-preservation, and now just look where it got her.
Those tears were falling now, with no one caring they did. The vagrant just grinned unpleasantly with his smelly teeth bared in a snarl, shameless to who he was or what he was doing. He probably had nothing to do with the actual village fire itself. He just a byproduct of its existence, simply here to loot from the destruction and its victims, uncaring of those around him or what had taken place. He had violated her and paid no real attention to it or whom she was. He was, quite simply, a wretched existence.
Emilia choked back a sob. If Subaru was gone, she didn’t want to live in this world anymore. He was all she had left.
Another man approached from the shadows which lay behind. He was shorter than the other, although just as twisted and wild looking. He sneered at his partner’s exotic find, and clapped his hand against his knee, clearly excited. The one who held her had since finally finished his tormenting of Emilia. He just glared at the shorter man, appearing to be somewhat unamused.
The short one gasped when he saw her pointed ears. With haste, he withdrew a dirty bandana from his pants pocket.
“Should we gag her?” the short man asked. “So the witch-freak doesn’t cast a spell on us.” “Do what you will,” her captor said.
With haste, the short man withdrew a dirty bandana from his pants pocket and inserted it into her mouth. The smell of it forced her to wretch. Emilia wanted to bite down on his fingers as hard as she could, but the knife was still against her neck. He wrapped another cloth around her mouth and tied the gag in place, silencing her for good. But with newfound strength, she struggled, bucking against his coarse grasp. The overwhelming power of the leader was too much to overcome. Even for one such as herself, he bore a terrible strength one could not easily discern. Tired of the struggle, the man pulled the jagged knife from her throat and backhanded her uncaringly across the cheek, knocking her into a daze. She lurched in his arms, dazed and unconscious.
Watching her fall limp in his arms, the other man scratched his chin, and pointed to the west. “There was another boy over there yonder,” he said, his heavy accent hard to understand. “No trouble he was. Got ‘im good, I did. Bashed his head right in with a rock.” He cackled and let out a vile, hysteric laugh.
“Where are the others?” the leader asked shortly.
There was a disdain in his voice. It was more evident than before. His partner seemed to take notice.
And he said, “They gone back to camp already, Boss,”
“Let’s head on back, then,” he said, patting the unconscious girl on the back mockingly. “We will be taking this one here for our own leverage later.”
“By the Dragon, I’ve never f*cked a half-elf,” he spluttered, spittle emanating from every audible syllable. “I heard if you plough ‘em on a full moon, you’ll have magical powers come the ‘morn.”
The leader bore a scowl on his face. “You will not touch her,” he said. “What do you mean, Boss?” the short man asked.
“You got mud in your ears?” the leader asked. “You heard what I said. This one will not be touched. Especially by you, most of all.” His gravelly voice grew dark and threatening.
The short man cowered away. “Sure thing, Boss,” he said.
The leader scoffed and turned to the east. His wordless respite signalled the other man to follow him, and so he did. With Emilia still over his shoulder, he began walking away. And as he did so, he kept half a mind of his own to touch and grope the unconscious half-elf in perverted ways. But he did not. He could not understand what had come over him. There was no mercy left in his dark heart, his tortured soul. Even so, his better judgement overcame his instinct to do such terrible things.
The flames still roared just as heavily as before. It would be some time before the final embers would burn out, leaving nothing but the charred remains of a village. The man holding Emilia grinned. He had no idea what had happened here, only that his band of outlaws had seen the smoke from afar, and they came quickly to investigate. They never could have expected to find what they did. They were low on supplies themselves, and so it was the perfect opportunity to capitalize on. Having pilfered, looted, and taken all they could, their reason for being here had ended. They had to head further north, and with great haste.
No doubt the lawful arm of the Kingdom Knights were hot on their trail. He considered what few options they had, and came to only one conclusion. They had to flee the realm of Lugnica, and fast.
Just two suns and two moons ago, they had robbed, stolen from, and murdered one of the wealthiest merchants in all Lugnica.
The short one called out his name. He picked up speed to walk side-by-side with him. “Hey, Boss,” he said, “why’re you in such a hurry?”
The two were swallowed in darkness yet again, as they had left the burning village some time ago. The moon hung patiently at their backs as their sole light source, aiding them moving through the darkened field. Close by lay the sleepy forest adjacent to Nicia, the one that led to the crossroads between Priestella to the north and southwards back toward the capital.
“Haven’t had a shower in days,” he replied. He smirked at the sight of his dirtied hands. They were nearly blackened by the grime of work. He continued, saying, “Wouldn’t mind one, and the sooner we get to Priestella, the better.”
Afterwards, the two men said nothing for a time. They had walked quite a ways into the forest now, and they made sure to stray from the main road. It didn’t make their journey any easier, but it was certainly safer. The road between Priestella and the capital was littered with guard patrols and other unwelcomed interference. Sooner still, the two could smell something smoky and delicious coming from just up ahead. He paid close mind to his steps now, approaching with carefulness and a greater precision. Stepping gently through the soft ground, he eyed a small wire just under his heel. It fell in and out of focus of his sight, the thin strip almost imperceptible in the darkest night of the forest. The moonlight had caught it at just the right angle, revealing its otherwise hidden presence.
He smirked to himself and stepped carefully over it. As he did so, he signalled to his partner of its existence. Protective measures like this were necessary when camping out in the wilds like they were, to easily alert themselves to any unwanted company, human or beast. Much to his dismay, his bumbling buffoon of a partner nearly tripped over the wire as he stepped over it. Why he allied himself with such people in the first place, he would never understand. He sighed heavily, silently judging the man from afar, but decided yet to let it alone. By now, the girl on his shoulders would be waking soon, although he was almost unsure of why he brought her along now. Initially, he did not care what would happen to her, and maybe he would even throw her to the wolves after letting his men have their way with her. However, as he walked across the moonlit night, he eyed her as she rested fast asleep on his shoulder.
He had given her some essence of wormroot to ease the ride; and sure enough, she rested well. Her face was serene, and her silver hair glistened in the softly illuminated dusk.
He shook his head for a moment. Why did his mind turn to such things? Probably a witch’s charm, he mused. He wasn’t soft like that. He shook away the thought of her bewitching him, although he did feel some measure of pity for her, and even the slightest remorse. Perhaps it was wrong to have treated her that way. Sure, he was no stranger to misdeeds. But to defile the girl? Maybe once she woke, he could set things right.
Stepping foot inside his camp, he glared at his two other associates who slept comfily under the night stars. The fire they birthed was lit dimly, with only its few last dying embers left before it would extinguish. The night air was cool, even if the tall pines around them provided some protection against the breeze.
He laid Emilia down onto a soft patch of grass and removed her gag. Her breath was even, still deep in sleep as she was and under the wormroot’s full effect. He took her gag and bound her wrists with it.
He was a thief—a murderer to be sure—but he did have remorse for his past actions, somewhat more than others. The world was a dark and sad place, as it had always been since he was a child. Nothing had changed since he grew into adulthood, nor would it ever. The poor died in the piss-and-sh*t-filled streets while the rich grew old, fat and eventually died surrounded by their gems, rocks and gold. That was life as he knew it, and many of the common folk viewed it just the same. So he sat down by the fire and drew his hands closer to the withering flame, dissatisfied by its negligible effect. Grimacing, he took some of the stray firewood on the side and tossed it in the pile, stoking it gently. The dry tinder was just enough to get the fire going strong again, bringing instant relief to his chilled hands. He stared at the flame, and the man’s thoughts roved back into the past, to older days: his upbringing wasn’t any excuse for his actions, and that’s not to say there could ever be an excuse for what he had done. To him, it was all the same. Those who were victim of cruelties, no matter how small or consequential, sometimes dealt their own cruelties onto others in return, until only wickedness was left in the world. One cruelty produced another, and so on; and because of that, he didn’t care. In the end, he knew what he was doing, and he owned every one of the decisions he had made.
He pulled his cloak back, revealing a fair but unkempt face, covered in a dark brown scruff of a beard. His brow furrowed heavily over his dark eyes, and his wild hair cascaded down past his collar: a testament to his time spent on the road without a proper cut. He could clean up quite nicely if he desired to. Not that he ever would.
It would be morning before the girl would awake, and because of that, he could afford to close his eye for a minute or two. He couldn’t remember a time when he wasn’t sleeping on the ground, whether it be dirt, grass or anything else. The man never had a place to call home, never stayed in one place for any noteworthy time. He found himself most comfortable surrounded by nothing but the steady breeze and the natural enclosure of the trees and wildlife. No loud bustling of the big city life, no putrid smell of dragon and human sh*t in the air. No, he wouldn’t find that out here on the path.
The fire next to him burned long after Verizar had passed into the deep thralls of sleep. The steady, scented smoke of the flame wisped through the trees like a silver river through the night.
He lay face down in the dirt. Fires blazed all around him, uncaring of neither his existence nor his plight. As he regained consciousness, his breath stirred, and he blew quick, panicked breaths from his mouth against the grimy mud; and while he struggled to get his wits about him, he remembered where he was, and why he was here.
He was in the ruined village of Nicia, and he had come here with Emilia. He thought himself dead, but maybe he was mistaken after all. Focusing, he tried to remember who or what had attacked him, but he couldn’t find the answer. There was nothing, except from the memory of him turning to call for out her name. She had unexpectedly drifted from his side, and only darkness followed that memory.
The bloody crust over his eyes broke apart with difficulty. He rose his hand to wipe it from his eyes. The head wound he suffered had bled profusely, and it pooling into his ears as well. He grimaced, propping himself up an arm as he tried to get up. In his foolhardy attempt, he stumbled, nearly falling to the ground. He caught himself in the last second.
It felt like a hammer was pounding a nail into his skull over and over, relentlessly and without mercy. The pain was all-encompassing, always there and beckoning him to fade away into madness. And amidst the mania of his incoherent mind, he saw the same silver- haired half-elf flashing there yet again.
“Emilia!” he called out.
There came no response. Subaru called out her name again. His voice was more frantic this time, more fraught with worry. His heart pummelled against the cage of his sternum. In his panic, he looked around, but saw nothing other than the ruinous remnants of a burning village. He screamed her name again, his voice now beginning to slur the beauty of it. With great effort he took a step, and then another. Soon, nothing but sheer will powered the machinations of his body. He gripped the pommel of his blade furiously and ripped it from its sheath, stabbing it onto the muck and falling the hilt for support.
He would make sure he found whoever did this. And when he did, he would make them suffer; make them regret leaving him alive and with his sword: a means for revenge. Too long had he suffered similar events as this. Death, devastation and chaos followed him like the ghosts of his past, haunting him there at every corner. His rage charged his desire to quell that which tormented him endlessly, once and for all. He would show these bandits no mercy, no quarter, like he had done all those times before. But Subaru heard nothing in response to his calls from the village entrapping him, and there was no sign of Emilia either. In his desperation, he paced himself quickly, using his sharp blade as a walking stick.
Then something odd caught his attention. His boot had crushed something hard into the ground. He looked down and raised his heel. And underneath it lay a small emerald crystal embedded in the soil like a seed. He eyed it carefully, before realizing what it was.
“Puck,” he whispered.
He reached down to retrieve the embedded crystal, and took it in his hand. He closed his fist, gripping the necklace so tight it drew blood. The new pain felt good, taking the focus off his constant agony and throbbing skull. He was sure now something terrible had befallen his Emilia. And there, as he stood alone amidst the twilight, a furious and uncontrollable anger swelled within him. He felt in his heart a desperation growing, and from this: a great determination. He seethed to himself in quiet beneath the starry night, surrounded by flames which burned as a reflection of his inner turmoil.
Then he felt a deathly chill overtake him, just like he had been swept away to another world where a blizzard raged. The emerald jewel pulsated with life there in his grasp, and he recoiled violently from a sharp, stabbing pain. The pendant fell solemnly to the dirt yet again, and his surroundings grew very dim. Time itself appeared to slow to a crawl. Flames burned slowly, and the air turned to be arid. His skull throbbed again, something prodded his subconscious, inviting themselves into his inner sanctum of mind and thought:
“They have taken my daughter,” the voice exclaimed.
The eerie voice was distant, and almost unclear to him. But one could understood its urgency.
“To where?” Subaru asked.
And the voice replied, “To the forest east of here. You must go now. My light will guide you to her.”
The jewel glowed faintly, more so than it had for a long time. Then it shattered into a thousand tiny pale fragments, leaving nothing but a small, translucent glowing blue orb in its wake. The lonesome spirit hovered upwards and briefly floated near Subaru, before abruptly dashing into the dark of the night, leaving a faint trail of dust behind it for him to follow.
Subaru knew he had little time to spare, and so he followed it before it would dissipate. It led him through the downs and away from the burning village toward the forest.
The fresh smell of the trees, the crispness of the air: it was heady. His surroundings blurred. He moved through the night with a quickness not like himself. The pulsating spirit guiding him served as his only illumination in the wood. The moon overhead was blacked out by the overhang; and as he continued through the long night, Subaru was externally calm, but inside, he burned like the village inferno. His breathing was fierce and uneven. He had never once felt so filled with such rage as now. Emilia being taken from him like this; he couldn’t stand it. His mind, already fragile it was, had been slowly decaying. He was detaching from reality. But here he was, like a needle of light piercing its way through an endless void.
Emilia was the only thing left in this world he held so dearly. He would do everything in his power to make sure he wouldn’t lose her too. And those who stood in his way? Simply put: he would kill them all. He felt there deep within him a mysterious energy swelling. It gave him focus and the will to act. He didn’t quite know what it was, but it wasn’t unwelcomed. For too long he had been weak; for too long, had he allowed those he loved to be hurt or even killed. He was powerless to stop the events which spiralled towards destruction right there in front of him. Instead, he had to rely on others to support him, even though he wished only to be the one to make a difference. It was selfish, but he was tired of sitting by the wayside. To watch others save him and his loved ones time and time again: that was another form of torture. No longer would he fear death; no longer would he fear those who hunted him.
When he came to this world, he was nothing but a naive child: blind to the truth and reality that he was nothing but a weakling. And instead of facing his weaknesses, instead of detesting himself for what he was, he hid it behind a cushion of lies, as if he were concealing a rotting corpse. His shame was buried under the guise of a fool; and only now, he finally understood. It took a thousand deaths for him to realize it. Now there would be no more lies. No more deceit of the self. He fully understood his ineptitude, and because of this, he would rectify every error of his past ways.
He saw a sparkle of light. And then the little spirit in front of him paused. It vibrated furiously before slowly fading from sight. At this, Subaru knelt lower, careful not to alert anyone to his presence. He could smell the faint scent of a burnt-out fire coming from up ahead. There was a small clearing where the moon cut through sharply, and its dull blue light shone as a spotlight for him to spy his enemy. Underneath it, five individuals lay sleeping beneath the starry night sky. Among them was the unmistakable sight of a silver-haired half- elf lying unconscious, her hair gleaming in the reflection of the moon.
“Emilia,” he whispered.
Subaru struggled to hold back. His voice was feral growl. He felt seething hatred overtake every machination of his body. From his boot, he withdrew a dagger with his left hand, and he carefully readied his sword with his right. Their blades shimmered brightly in the darkness. His face was misshapen in a snarl, his teeth bared and gritting painful-like. He approached carefully, making sure his footsteps elicited no sound. He was quiet, like a predator stalking its prey, ready to strike at any moment. Then as he took a certain step, ever so slowly, he felt something thin brush over his foot. He looked down, and the moonlight revealed a small, thin wire in the corner of his eye. It was practically invisible to the untrained eye in the shrouded darkness. If not for the luck of the moon, he would not have seen it.
He breathed a sigh of relief. Beads of sweat tumbled down his forehead. He made sure to wipe away before it fell. Stepping silently into the camp, he approached one of the slumbering individuals. With his dagger in hand, it hovered near the unknowing man’s neck. He made sure not to look at his face; he didn’t want any regrets.
And with one quick motion, he embedded the blade deep into the man’s throat. As he tore it out, warm blood splashed against his face. His shocked victim awoke in terror, with death already kicking down his door. Subaru held his hand over the panicked man’s mouth as the blood pooled from his neck, drowning himself in his own bodily fluids. He struggled, but Subaru straddled him so he couldn’t draw any unwanted attention. With death already overtaking the man, such a struggle was short-lived. Very soon his body fell limp, and his panicked, darkened eyes rolled back into his head. Subaru then peered around the encampment.
Nobody had noticed what he had just done.
That left only three more, but the others were closer together. This would pose a problem. He decided he needed to act fast and brazen. The element of surprise was certainly an advantage here, but it could only get him so far.
Gripping both blades with fury, he leapt from the gurgling corpse, and with close precision, he lodged the blood-stained dagger into another man’s neck. He awoke with a shock and clawed madly at the blade stuck in his throat. Now incapacitated, he would drown in his own blood as well.
As the panicked sounds of death sang throughout the night, the other two men finally stirred from their sleep. Leaping up, the brown-haired man grasped his sword lying next to him and readied himself. The other wasn’t so lucky. With speed, Subaru had already brought his sword down upon the man’s collarbone as he reached for his weapon, cutting through his lungs and heart mercilessly. He fell to the ground, dead within seconds of the strike.
Subaru put his foot against the corpse and wrenched his blade from it, spewing the ground in blood. The other man nearby spasmed violently, kicking and wailing with the dagger still stuck in his throat. The brown-haired man readied himself and brought his blade up just in time to block a death blow, parrying a swing from Subaru with great speed and agility. He recoiled, stumbled backwards, and prepared himself with a wild stance, his sword hanging overhead to catch the reflection of the silvery moon.
Subaru grimaced and stared him down with all the hatred he could muster. The brown-haired man just gazed at him with a clear cool head. He furrowed his brow and nodded his head at the unconscious girl which still lay amongst the bloodbath of his friends.
“That elf-bitch is your girl, huh?” he said plainly. “I can see why you’re so angry. Believe me, if someone stole from me a fine piece of ass like that half-witch, I would burn down this entire forest. You have my sympathies, kid.”
Subaru said nothing in reply. His grasped on his sword tightened further.
The man smiled. “Got nothing to say, huh?” he asked. “Well, let’s get this over with, then.”
Wordlessly, Subaru lunged forward, blade in hand, and swung it diagonally upwards from the side. His opponent parried him effortlessly, knocking him off balance. The man could have struck him down, but he didn’t.
“You bastard!” Subaru said. “Don’t you toy with me!”
He leapt forward again, this time from head on. His movements were easy to follow for the seasoned duellist, or for someone of this man’s calibre. He smiled to himself as he blocked the incoming jab. The blade passed harmlessly by him, and he thrust his shoulder into Subaru, shoving him to the ground. His blade landed a few feet away. Now disarmed, Subaru lay there, helpless and exposed. The man’s own sword hovered just over his face, ready to end his life at any moment. But the blade did not fall, nor did he pull it back. Subaru’s breathing was heavy, his heart pounding violently against his chest, almost like it was going to burst. He had felt like this before. Many times in fact: always before he met the cold, bitter end of death.
“You’re beat, kid,” the bandit leader mocked. “You might have got the drop on my friends, but you weren’t so lucky with me. If you were smarter, you would have taken me out first. Not so easy is it, to play the noble hero?”
The man was right. He had failed, and now he was going to die. He knew there was nothing to do but accept it.
“What is your name?” Subaru asked.
“You’re about to die,” the bandit replied. “It doesn’t matter what my name is.”
“It does matter,” said Subaru. “I want to know the name of the one who finally killed me. Thousands have tried, but ever did they fail.”
The man thought for a moment. Then: “Verizar,” he said. “That’s my name.”
Subaru nodded. He was calm on the outside, but his mind raced as he desperately looked for a way out. He couldn’t cast any magic, as his gate was still wrecked beyond repair. He couldn’t reach his sword. What then, could he do, except die?
He eyed the blade which hovered tauntingly in front of him. Then his brow furrowed. There was one chance, but he had to be quick. There with great speed, he pushed himself off the ground and latched onto Verizar’s blade with all his might. It cut through his hands, but it caught his foe off-guard enough to surprise him.
Verizar pulled, attempting to withdraw the blade from Subaru’s grasp, but the boy’s grip stood strong. Blood pooled down the edges of the blade and dripped onto its pommel. He stood there, wordless and in shock. Perhaps he hadn’t expected such resolve from him. While his guard was lowered, Subaru then pushed with all his might to throw his opponent onto his back, using his sword as a catalyst.
His last-ditch effort was nearly successful. But Verizar was ever smarter than he took him for. The bandit leader suddenly let go of his sword, and Subaru fell forward. Before he knew it, the man had withdrawn a small blade from his belt. Subaru gasped at a sudden sharp pain and fell to the ground. He rolled over onto his side and gripped the blade. It was stuck in his back, near his shoulder. He attempted to remove it, but it was wedged between the bone. He quickly scrambled, struggling to get to his feet. But he couldn’t get away from his attacker. In a gamble, he overplayed his hand, and he now he had truly lost.
His breathing was laboured now. He rasped for breath. His physicality was beginning to show its limit, no matter what obsession pushed him as it did. He was only human, after all.
Verizar scoffed at the pitiful sight in front of him. He almost felt bad for the kid. To come this far just to fail: that amused him more than anything else.
“You know,” he said, “I have to give you credit. You lasted longer against me than most ever did. But now, the game has to come to an end.”
He raised his sword high to the night sky for the final blow. Frozen in terror, Subaru was powerless to defend against the blow. Verizar brought his arm down with a terrible speed.
And the blade fell, but nothing struck Subaru. In front of him, there was a golden aura of fire. It hovered brilliantly in front of him, guarding himself from the devastating killing blow with its burning blaze. Subaru looked around, confused as to what was happening.
Verizar cursed. He pulled back and looked around. His eyes widened at what he saw. “That witch,” he exclaimed.
Subaru looked. He couldn’t believe his own eyes. Emilia stood there, her amethyst eyes glistening with tears of anger. Her hands were still bound behind her back, but that didn’t keep her mouth from speaking the protective incantation. The air around them became dry, dissipating all the moisture of the forest, evaporating in the presence of her power. The heat in the air became so intense her bounds burned to a crisp, finally freeing her hands. She outstretched her arm in the direction of Verizar, and fire combusted from the palm of her hand. His eyes widened in shock, and from a pouch, he pulled a small grey ball. Immediately, he threw it against the ground, and the entire area went up in a grey smoke.
With the shield of fire still surrounding Subaru, Emilia raised both of her hands in the air and released a firewall which encompassed the entire camp, burning all in its path. The grey smoke dissipated immediately. The air shrunk. Smoke and dust spread throughout the clearing, cindering like fireflies in the air, illuminating the darkness with small specks of light. The flames spread from the camp and to the surrounding forest, igniting all in its indominable reach. The dryness of the surrounding wood proved easy tinder for such a fire, and long would it be before the flames faded completely; and ss the strongest of them began to subside, Emilia stumbled slightly, but was caught by Subaru. She had exhausted herself by conjuring such a power she couldn’t even remember learning. He looked around them, to make sure they were safe. The man had obviously escaped; only the charred remains of his companions remained, burning from the remnants of the ruinous fires.
The putrid smell of burnt flesh filled the air, and Subaru thought of nothing but to get away from here.
“Emilia, don’t look,” he said. “Let’s go some place else.”
Said half-elf looked at him with large tear-filled eyes. She nodded solemnly. The girl couldn’t look him in the eyes right now. She couldn’t bear to see the pain in them. Subaru had gotten hurt because of her, yet again. Because of her, he had suffered. But with the knife still stuck in his back, he wrapped his arm around her quivering shoulders to help her walk. In truth, he probably needed help with walking more than her. But he could think of nothing else to do in the moment. She accepted his gesture of kindness unwittingly.
The two slowly paced themselves away from the camp. Emilia turned her head, looking back at the carnage they left in their wake. She saw the remains of the three bandits, those who just moments ago drew breath. Never had she done something like this. Not since that time, long ago.
“Don’t look back there, Emilia,” Subaru said. With his bloodied fingers, he tenderly touched her cheek. “Just forget about it, okay? Just look at me, just think about us.”
Her tear-speckled eyes of amethyst locked with his hazel ones. The eyes were the portal to one’s soul, and she knew then she had accidentally revealed herself to him. Subaru peered into her troubled soul like this. He saw the pain, the anger she felt, and the sadness. He had to do something, but he knew only one way to comfort her: and that was with his love. But only when he gripped her hand; and only then did she realize how hard she had been clinging to him. His lips pressed against her own, his blood-and-dirt-covered hand cupping her cheek with gentility. In this moment did tears fall from her stricken eyes, and with it, he felt every ounce of feeling pouring from her soft lips: the urgency of her kiss, the occasional bite of the lip, her passion as she pressed against him; and even as a knife still jutted violently from his back.
He didn’t care anymore. The only person, the only thing which mattered was the girl who needed him so badly as she did. There was no pain, there was no sorrow: it was gone as soon as they came together as one; and he conveyed this to her with his touch and with his undying need. He told her how he would give his life for her own, he told her not to worry about his wounds. He said to her the world did not matter when it meant her safety. No word needed be said. All of this was in the conviction of their kiss shared between each other.
And when they had come back to reality that night, the two made their way down to a shallow creek dividing the forest in two. Emilia washed his wounds as best she could. She superheated the blade stuck inside him. It was painful, but it was necessary to remove it. Subaru did not cry out in agony, nor did he whine. He let her work, and soon, he felt the warmth of her healing magic soothing him from head to toe. His body ached for sleep and for recovery. Even with her skills, he could still feel the side effects of such devastation to his body, mentally and physically. Much time passed, after it was all said and done, the two took to the road. Subaru told her about her spirit, Puck, and what had happened. If not for him, he would not have found her as he did. He owed the spirit cat a great debt of gratitude. Emilia told him her own stories: said she knew Puck hadn’t left her, and that he would guide him to her. That was the kind of protective spirit he was. And come morning, the pair took up the main road for a change and continued up northwards toward Priestella. The two were careful to hide their identity from any oncoming travellers, trying their best to avoid attention. The further they travelled, the colder it got. In the evening, they camped by the side of the road in a small gully. Behind them lay a tree line which cut back into a winding forest they had no interest in traversing. The two hadn’t shared much in conversation; instead, they enjoyed their time together without much going on.
But still there was the memory of the burning village. That hellish place called Nicia, and the mystery surrounding it: and it was these thoughts pestering him in the back of his mind like a bad headache. The cursed woods was another point of question for him. Who could ever know if those two events were connected? Even now, he guessed it didn’t matter. Such happenings like those were out of his hands in the first place. He struggled to push the thoughts of this away as best he could. But such hopes could not avail him.
They were near the crossroads which lead west to Priestella now. It was a prime trade route, one leading to a small outpost full of city officials and traders. If they were to pass through there, they would have to be careful and seldom talk to anyone. Emilia had suggested they make a roundabout and avoid the crossroad, but Subaru didn’t want to risk any more violent confrontation for the time being.
When Subaru heard the trotting steps of ground-dragons pass by, he noticed Emilia struggling to light a fire with her fingertips. She furrowed her brow in a pout, clearly beside herself. It was freezing outside, and they could really use a fire. She snapped her fingers together, over and over just like she had done so many times before. But still, no fire came. She let out an angry huff. A warm fire would feel wonderful for the two of them right now.
“I don’t understand!” Emilia whined. She continued snapping her fingers together, saying, “My gate is worn thin. I must have overexerted myself by accident.”
“It could be possible,” Subaru said, withdrawing some flint and tinder from his pack. “Guess we can settle for the old-fashioned way, though.” He took a steel piece and worked it against the flint, over and over, until small sparks lit the dry wood just a little bit. “Once there’s a small flame, blow just like this.” He cupped his hands, and with precision, he blew just gently on the smouldering tinder. It smoked and spread throughout the wood. Within moments, a small fire had erected.
Emilia clapped excitedly. “Thank you,” she said. “There was nothing to it,” Subaru said.
He winked at her, watching her throw a bit of tinder on the flame. He was almost certain she knew how to start a fire without magic. But he was just trying to humour her: to make light about her loss of magical prowess. It would be a damning thing for her gate to be damaged beyond recognition. Her magic was a powerful asset, just to her, but for him as well. Without Puck and a damaged gate, it would be almost impossible for her to, and by god he knew her powers were important. She needed a means to defend herself, and her magic certainly provided that defence.
As they sat around the campfire, the two had relaxed comfortably into the arms of one another. After some time had passed, a growing noise echoed in the pale gloom of the young night. Soon, that echo turned to a roaring thunder, almost akin to a small earthquake, and Subaru looked over to see what the noise was. There he saw a small band of about a dozen merchants and their three ground-dragons making their way down the dusty road toward the outpost. Subaru noticed they were in quite a rush, as the ground-dragons were played out from a long journey. Their deep and repetitive breaths were visible in smoky puffs through the cold air.
Emilia and Subaru both watched the outpost gates swing open without warning, obviously receptive of the merchant’s arrival. They chatted with the guards for a minute. A few choice words were exchanged, because he could hear some shouting and other fuss come from their direction. They finished their terse exchange soon enough, and then disappeared within the confines of the outpost’s walls.
“That’s our ticket” Subaru said, poking at the fire. “We need to get in there somehow. But how?”
Emilia thought for a moment, then smiled, saying, “Well, perhaps we can pose as onr of those merchants?”
It was a typical idea, almost too simple to work. But they didn’t look like merchants: a half- elf and a man with no goods to peddle. Yeah, we really look like merchants, Subaru thought sarcastically. “No, that wouldn’t work,” he then said, scratching the scruff of his growing beard. “But we could sneak in with one of the merchant patrols coming through here.”
“That’s a good idea,” Emilia exclaimed.
Truly, it shouldn’t be very difficult to accomplish.
“Hopefully they have a tavern there,” Subaru said. He stood up, rubbing his starved stomach. “I could use a hot meal and a good drink to ease my mind.”
He didn’t think himself a drunk, but he certainly wouldn’t mind being drunk for a change. It would take his mind off things for a bit; loosen up, that sort of thing.
Emilia replied with an agreeable moan. Her hunger was evident as well. They were both made tired from their long journey, and the thought of rest excited them greatly. From the distance, Subaru could see another small company of merchants approaching, this time with four ground-dragon caravans transporting goods to Priestella. It was perfect timing.
Subaru kicked dirt over the fire to quickly put it out and picked up his sword and belongings. Emilia followed suit and the two scrambled up the ravine just off the road. There they laid prone in wait for the caravans to pass by.
“Just follow me, okay?” he said, holding her hand tight. Emilia nodded in response, and swallowed in preparation.
The ground began to shake as the dragons approached closer and closer. The two watched as they began to pass by them. They would do best to take the final caravan in the back to avoid suspicion.
“Now!” he said.
As the final caravan approached, the two jumped up from their low position quickly. Subaru took Emilia in his arms and threw her into the back of the caravan. He just barely hung onto the back of it. Seconds later and he would have missed it. Hanging onto the back of it, he nearly slipped, but Emilia took hold of his hand. She helped him into the wagon and pulled him against her. Now they lay in the back of the transport, undiscovered and on a free ride to the outpost. The caravan shook as it travelled along the road. It was a bumpy ride in the back of a dragon-drawn caravan, as he had once experienced before. But it was no matter; Subaru couldn’t complain about their current situation. Everything was going according to plan.
“Well, that couldn’t have gone any better,” he said. It went almost too well. Nothing ever went well for him, did it?
“Certainly!” she said excitedly.
After a bit, the caravan came to a sudden halt. They had come upon the gate now, and it swung open just like before. One by one the wagons passed through, and as it came to be their turn, he could hear the gate guards exchange a few words with the operator of the ground-dragon.
“You there,” the guard exclaimed. He looked at merchants with suspicion. “What goods are you transporting to Priestella?”
“Armaments,” the driver said, “and war-time supplies for the guard, sir.” There was a nervousness in the merchant’s voice.
The guard had little patience for the monotony of his daily duties. He asked, “Do you consent to a search of your goods and properties?”
“That’s not good,” Subaru said.
Emilia covered her mouth with her palm in shock.
“No, I do not, sir,” the driver replied. “I can assure you my goods are completely legal and of the highest quality.”
“Pass on through then,” the guard finally said, albeit begrudgingly. “Be on your way.”
Both Subaru and Emilia breathed a deep sigh of relief. They were about to be caught in the most pathetic way possible. The wagon lurched forward, the wheels rolling over the ground again. The two kept quiet as the convoy passed into the outpost. In silence, they carefully planned when they would make their escape out into the town. And as the caravan made a turn out of sight from the gate-guards, the pair silently slipped out of the caravan and made their way off the road to avoid detection.
Inside the outpost was nothing truly interesting. It served its purpose: to be a trade route between the south cities and the north cities; and for that, it worked out perfectly. Trade routes such as these were popular for government officials to inhabit, so they could properly enforce their trade tax, giving financial support to the main cities. Such a tax was a trifling matter indeed, considering most lesser villages had no governmental support or protection. It was a flawed system to be sure. But there were a few buildings to be seen: shops, cottages, along with what looked to be a shanty tavern to house weary travellers. Merchants were going in and out of it quite rapidly, so clearly it was a popular area.
Nobody questioned the two as they made their way to the entrance. Emilia kept her hood over her ears to conceal her identity as a half-elf, and Subaru kept calmly to himself. In fact, they blended quite well among the populace. He rolled the sliding door back and looked around the nameless tavern. A familiar sight greeted him: humans and demi-humans.
Merchants and off duty guards. Even vagabonds from outer territories filled this establishment as like-minded individuals, all sharing in the comfort of a warm watering hole. This tavern even had an entourage playing a few merry songs on their lutes and drums. It was a welcoming sight to behold.
Emilia smiled brightly to Subaru. He returned the gesture. It was areas such as these which took the weight of the world off his shoulders. It was nice to come here to enjoy a hot meal, forget the worlds troubles and drink all his problems away. In a world like this, who couldn’t resist doing that?
Subaru felt his stomach release an angry growl. Emilia stifled a laugh in response to it, much to his embarrassment. Not that she wasn’t starving herself. She was indeed made to be hungry. Who wouldn’t be after what they went through? Even so, it was high time they sat down for some dinner, or they at least needed to get something in their stomachs. So the two sat down at an empty table, and Subaru motioned for the bar-lady to bring them something to eat. She nodded shyly and quickly returned with two mugs of mead, as well as the special of the day. It was some type of potato-soup mashup. Not particularly appetizing as normal, but in these circ*mstances it more than sufficed. Subaru flipped her a gold piece in a kind gesture of gratitude and quickly dug into his plate.
Emilia chuckled at her starving partner. If they could go less than a day without missing a meal, that would just be amazing. Recently, every time they went out into the wild, it felt like it would be days before they could find food or drink. It was not the most health routine. She hoped it would change in the near future. And as Subaru sipped from his mug of mead, he felt the warmth of the liquor sting his throat. There was a hot sensation tingled in his belly.
Simply put, it felt wonderful. After a few more sips from his mug, the effects of the drink began to take over him. This was something which tasted better with every sip. In a daze, he eyed his female partner across from him. Emilia sipped happily from her mug as well. When he lowered his mug, he noticed too she was looking at him with a curious glint in her eye.
She was very mischievous looking today.
Subaru hoped things between them would begin to settle down. He did enjoy his budding relationship with Emilia more than anything in the world. But that wasn’t the issue. There was such a tension between the two he could barely stand it. It took every ounce of his will to keep him from jumping on her, right here and now in front of everyone.
If they kept this up, things might end badly between them. For sure, once they got some free time to settle down and rest, he would talk about what happened over the past few days with her. They hadn’t had the time to sit down and chat about it like a normal couple. No, they didn’t have time for that. Even as they endured such devastating and draining events as they did. There still wasn’t proper time to sit down and just to talk. But at least they could express things physically. That was always easier for him, more natural in a way. He felt a warm blush spread across his cheeks at his remembrance of such things.
Emilia must have taken note of it too. I wasn’t hard to see, after all. She playfully smirked at him and sipped from her mead innocently, as if nothing in the world was bothering her. But she was almost just as conflicted as he was. All the anger she had felt towards those bandits who kidnapped her, who hurt Subaru. And then what had transpired afterwards: she recalled their bodies, the smell of it all. She couldn’t think of such things now. She didn’t want to think of death, or violence. It was because of this Emilia had almost blocked the event out entirely, forgetting about it for the moment. Even so, it was there at the back of her mind, nagging at her, as such things always did.
But the passage of time always mended the heart. And thankfully, so did drink. After a few mugs of mead and another bowl of soup, Subaru found himself dancing with the patrons of the bar. The music was festive and merry, and he just couldn’t keep himself from joining in all of the fun. Well, to be honest, he didn’t even realize how he became a part of this in the first place. One moment he was sitting, and the next, dancing, and soon enough the girl of his dreams was in his arms. He held Emilia tightly against him. Her cheeks were buzzing with a reddish hue, well under the influence of whatever they just drank. One step here, another there. It was all a blur.
He hadn’t even noticed the precise moment when her hood had fallen off. Now her pointy ears were exposed for all the tavern to see. Luckily enough for the pair, the merry patrons of the bar were far too deep in their cups and preoccupied with the festivities to notice. And so, they danced, danced, and danced some more until the sun had long since set in the west, and the moon rose to take its place.
Eventually, the patrons of the tavern began to recede to the comfort of their beds, and with that, the dancing and merry games ceased. But the effects of the night had long since taken hold. Emilia gave Subaru a wry smile, and he offered her somewhat of a wistful gaze. Her eyes were dilated and inquisitive. Time passed slowly; the whole world was forgotten, except for the single half-elf he kept so close to his heart. He didn’t know where they went, or where they were going, but he didn’t care. Somehow, the two found themselves in a warm, low-lit room; and as they shut the door behind them, they stumbled to remove their clothes and fumbled onto the bed. To his surprise, by some god somewhere, they had made it without falling to the floor.
The shock of the events which played out the night before were lost to them now. Their lives had become nothing but a warm haze of love and happiness. He felt a burning sensation there, pulling at him, beckoning to his heightened senses, or lack thereof. Emilia, ever the one to please, noticed this, and with all the allure of a goddess, she revealed herself to him.
Subaru hesitated, his mouth agape at the scenery of her silky-smooth alabaster skin. Ever so tantalizing to touch, and even more so to taste. He dragged his mouth across her collarbone, and to her neck, leaving small bites in his wake. The world spun, dizzy like some sort of dream. She moaned and pressed against him in response. At the top of the window, the moon spilt through brilliantly, illuminating their small room in a mystical cast of pale light. Her vibrant amethyst eyes were darker than he had ever seen them before. They spoke to him as he gazed longingly into them, and very clearly, he heard the forbidden words even though her mouth remained still:
“I want you,” she said without words.
No part of him dared to protest the silent plea she gave him. Drawing his hands over the smooth contours of her body, Subaru could feel her shallow breath and the deepening flush which graced her pale skin. While he memorized her in the silvery light of the moon, he touched her cheek with a tender palm. She turned her face inward into it and kissed him, savouring his taste as she worked her way around his hand. As she had done so, he removed the final remnants of her clothing and cupped her breasts as they finally revealed themselves.
She moaned and tore at his own clothing, her nails leaving superficial marks across his skin as they glided over him with surgical precision.
She needed him, and he her, and soon she lay over him, naked and wanting, and he obliged her. She felt all of him, and they rocked against each other with all the rhythm of a clear blue stream; and as he thrust into her, he felt her need, all her want. He could feel the sorrow, the pain, the suffering, but they paled in comparison to her happiness, the vastness of her peace. She yearned for him so greatly, he knew that now. Yearned like he yearned for her all this time. This was the perfect moment. He reached out to touch her deeper, as far as he could.
And when he touched her there, Emilia climaxed for the first time. She whispered the forbidden mantra of his name over and over into his ear, spoken like the spells a witch might cast upon her runes. The pleasure piercing her mind silenced her thoughts, cleared her of all unwanted emotion. There was only Subaru, and nought else in this world now.
As she finished, Subaru began to pace himself quicker and quicker, and he began to lose himself in the pleasures of her sex. Soon enough, he felt his own climax. His was powerful, and a much-needed release into oblivion. His body went limp against her own, and she pulled him deep against her, like she would never let go.
The world became a memory, distant and hazy. But he could still hear her sweet singing voice, whispering forgotten things into his ear. Things which were forever lost to him, as all words and syllables of the world were now just a vague idea. He couldn’t process anything tangible, but he could still hear her soft angelic voice as it lulled him into a deeper calm than he had ever known. Not wanting to disturb him, she moved out from underneath his body.
The boy was still limp against her own. He did not fight back, nor did he try to keep her from going. He just lay there, not abashed, but lost to the world and its intricacies.
All he saw was Emilia, and as she drew loving circles on his back and covered him in small kisses of tender comfort, his passion for her grew tenfold. Soon, his eyes shut, and he rolled comfortably onto his side. She cocooned herself against his unmoving body, caressing him with an everlasting love; and as he drifted away from the waking world, he could hear her soft, gentle voice singing to him there in his dreams.
Chapter 4: The Jealous Shadow
Chapter Text
Subaru woke up gasping, clutching his chest and heaving over his blankets, struggling to breathe. Flailing on the bed, he felt as if his very life force siphoned away by something invisible. It was a familiar feeling he thought had gone forever, and had made its return quite the surprise.
Blackness: it was all he saw now. Soon enough, he was in the depths of his own mind. There was no semblance of direction, time, or anything else he could identify. He then realized it was a world deeper inside him than even his own subconscious, locked away from all interference from the rest of existence. In this desolate world, he saw nothing, and even deeper within, he saw shadows within the nothingness. It was vague, but he could trace the outline ofsomething, hiding shyly behind a miasma of envy, love and despair.
Then, a small but unmistakable voice escaped through the chasm of nothingness, reaching his deafened ears:
“My love for you is everlasting,” whispered the shadow.
It was staggered and faint, but clear enough to understand. Even still, it was strange; the voice itself was familiar, but the words of love were not. Its slithering speech continued, saying, “Why did you separate from me? My love goes unrequited, and I can only suspect you have abandoned me. Why did you hide yourself under pretence, as if you held no love for me at all?”
The unacquainted, yet still-familiar voice echoed throughout the black corridors of the surrounding invisible walls. Her voice was soft, a mixture of emotions, both sad and apologetic, but he could feel a tinge of anger, or perhaps distrustemanating from it.
He did not respond.
The figure vibrated and stirred furiously in the darkness. Her passionate song grew louder with every declaration, as she said: “I love you . . . I love you . . . Iloveyou! Will you find it within your heart to requite such feelings? Without your love, I suffer an everlasting loneliness that no other can banish.”
He floated toward the soft chime which beckoned him like only one other person could. The words, and the voice itself was unmistakable. It was a familiar sound, yet the yearning felt within it was foreign, as a strangers. But he knew it could have been no one else.
Facing the sea of black, he dared to speak, saying, “Is that you, Emilia . . . ?”
No response in return. Then he felt something grip his throat. It was that welcoming suffocating feeling he received every time he threatened to break the rules of his Return by Death.
He clawed frantically at his neck as it tightened further, forcing his eyes to roll backwards into his head. With death knocking, he grasped the invisible arms sucking the life from his body. Changing stratagem, and knowing nothing else to do, he tried uselessly to peel the immeasurably strong fingers from his throat. The vessels in his eyes finally popped from the stress, painting his eyes blood red. He kicked madly, flailing helplessly as he began to lose consciousness, but the firm grip of the shadows still held strong.
“Stop, please,” he begged.
His raspy, strained voice was barely able to escape his ensnared throat. But as if responding to his plea, the grip loosened, allowing him to suck in a few vital gulps of air. Slowly, the silhouette behind the shadow slowly came into view, revealing herself to him. His bloodshot eyes widened, and he sucked in another breath of air no sooner before gasping it out in shock.
There, a thin woman who appeared no older than he exposed herself. Her dress, malformed from the blanketing shadows surrounding them, pulsated around her. It reminded him of heartbeats, its rhythm stricken and pained from loss. Silver flowing hair dangled long past her shoulders, and solemn tears dripped steadily from her amethyst eyes. Her glowing pale skin which threatened to blind him, contrasted heavily with the pitch black which surround them.
This unique, unquestionably beauteous face belonged to one person dear to him, and one person alone. It was that of the girl whom he depended on so dearly, the one whom he made love to just hours prior. Yet, something was different about her. Her face bore an expression so dismal and filled with sadness it rivalled even his darkest moments. Gone was the cheery face of the one he held so close to his heart, replaced by someone who had clearly been through much despair. Even so, although she was threatening to strangle his life away just moments ago, her plush cheeks were painted with a rosy-red colour, signifying she was either shy, anxious or embarrassed, or something else unimaginable, to say the least.
The maiden glowered and looked upon him with tear laden eyes. “Please, call upon my true name,” she said with quivering voice, tinged with heartbreak. “Many years have gone by since I last heard it, and I may have yet forgotten its sound. I beg you to allow my ears to hear your voice speak it once more.”
Her name,he thought.That name,he always wondered about. His eyes closed, as her pure voice rung throughout his head, pulling him back to a moment long past.
They were standing on the balcony overlooking the slums of Lugnica. The half-elf dangled playfully over the railing, her hair flowing gracefully in the steady wind. She effortlessly painted the skyline with her beauty. Without her, this moment would be nothing. With her, any moment was of such great consequence he could remember every detail, down to the cracks in the bricks beneath them. As he stood there silently, all he could think about was her intoxicating potent smell of jasmine, and the sheer impossibility of her loveliness.
He spoke his request, and she turned to him slowly.
“Satella,” the half-elf introduced herself, her emotions unrecognizable apart from a mild hesitation in her voice. “I don’t have a last name, so you can just call me Satella.”
Her spirit cat hovered quietly over her shoulder, watching her movements closely. There was a long pause in speech, as the two parties stared at each other without a word to exchange. The red-sun winds blew heartily in the tepid Lugnican air, capturing the half-elf’s hair marvellously in its grasp.
Then the sprawling city skyline began to warp harshly, and twisted into darkness until it was no more.
His eyes opened once more, and he again stood face to face with the reason for his existence. Her piercing aquamarine pupils bore deep into his own bloodied eyes. She was only inches from him now. It was then he could smell the heady scent of rich jasmine, something he had become quite accustomed to. She was as alluring and tantalizing as ever, something he could just reach out and touch without a moment of thought.
Instead, she herself extended one frail hand to finally touch him. After all this time, one touch is all she ever wanted. He flinched as her fingers brushed gently over his cheek, as they were cold and clammy—probably from something akin to nervousness, or even fright.
Was she afraid of him? He didn’t want her to feel that way.
Slowly, he reached up and brushed his own hand over her own, squeezing it with both care and comfort. Her soft eyes burst wide open as tears began to brim the corners, threatening to fall without any second. She abruptly pulled backwards, and with a worry that she might go away, he reached again out to her, but it was too late.
There was a deafening sound, and he was wrenched from the depths of the darkness within his own mind.
Now with beads of sweat brimming his forehead, Subaru shot up from the bed. Panicked, he looked around the cabin, gasping for breath. He was alone. Shakily, his hand reached up to touch his cheek, where her little hand had just rested seconds ago. It was still warm from the unexpected contact.
The spot next to him where his lover lay was cold and empty. It was unusual for her to leave his side, especially as he slept. It was still dusk outside, probably just before sunrise. So, Subaru dressed himself, stood and walked over to the desk where Emilia’s belongings lay just the night before. Of course they were gone, and with no explanation or a letter to write why or where she had fled to.
Then suddenly he could hear the rusted doorknob jiggle behind him. He turned to face it as the door slowly propped itself open, revealing the girl of his worry. She looked at him with surprise, as if she had been caught in the middle of an improper act. Unusually so, she was dressed in her plain white garb, along with her magical pointy eared cloak. Her eyes blinked at him inquisitively, wondering if he would speak. Her large amethyst eyes were a deep purple colour, and just so, so beautiful. Never mind that,he thought. Sometimes it was a struggle to think clearly and consistently regarding her.
“Emilia, I didn’t expect you back so soon,” he said, as he walked over and held the door for her. “What are you doing out so early in the morning? I was worried for a moment . . . Are you—”
“I was just out for a walk,” Emilia said, her voice curt as she cut him off. She walked inside with soft footsteps and passed him to stand near the foot of the bed. “Last night, I was feeling uncomfortable for some reason. So, while the moon was bright and the air was cool and agreeable, I stepped out to talk with the lesser spirits. Normally, I communicated with them every day. It has been almost four days since my last meeting with them. They had . . . a lotto share with me.”
Subaru nodded but kept quiet. Her voice was soft and unsure, like she had done something wrong. She hadn’t, of course. But it was her nature to act this way. She looked at him plainly now, her doe eyes widened, but filled with caution. Slowly, he reached out his hand to touch hers.
Then a sudden blood-curdling scream jolted Emilia from her haze, making her jump backwards. She saw Subaru falling chaotically to the ground. She went immediately to kneel beside him, but was unsure of what to do as she watched him flailing wildly on the ground, seemingly assailed by something invisible.
She called out his name. Her shriek of a voice was almost deafened as his world turned dark. He was pale as the snow of the Sanctuary, heaving and unable to speak from the amount of pain he was experiencing. It felt as if his heart was being squashed between two powerful hands. He gasped out in pain, and then swallowed the metallic tasting blood which had escaped from his throat.
Emilia then said, “Subaru, please, what is it? Please tell me what’s wrong!” Panicked, she pressed her hands against him and began a healing incantation.
After a few agonizingly long moments, the pressure released itself, and the world came back into focus. He stood hastily and crawled over to the corner of the room, hiding his pained face from Emilia.
“Don’t come close to me,” he said, his mouth filling once more with the taste of blood. “Stay away from me, please. Just get away from me, now!”
She stared at him with confusion, the shock on her face easy for anyone to see.
So with haggard breath, he hoisted himself up. He stumbled and tripped over his own feet in a hurry, and then raced madly out the door without any explanation or recourse for the silver-haired half-elf he left behind. She just watched him leave without any interference. And as the door hung open, other patrons of the inn stood outside her room, wondering what all the fuss was about. They talked curiously amongst themselves, paying no attention to the small, frail girl left who had been left behind.
Splayed out, she rested upon her knees, shaking from the unexpectedness of it all. Hot tears streamed steadily down her cheeks, with no sign of ending.
“Subaru, please come back,” she uttered, her voice a panicked cry. Now she was sobbing uncontrollably, and with nobody to comfort her. “Please, don’t leave me!”
There was no response, and she was met with only silence and the sounds of her own convulsions. Very soon her cries ceased, and with it, her sadness was replaced with a growing realization. After a moment, a frightened and desperate voice went unnoticed amongst the crowd:
“Don’t leave me . . .”
“I have no one else.”
“ . . . Subaru?”
“You promised you wouldn’t leave me, ever.”
“ . . . Subaru, you liar.”
He only knew to run. And run he did, for so long he couldn’t go on any longer.
Subaru fell on his hands and knees. Gasping for breath, he stared at his barely-visible reflection in the murky puddle beneath him. He looked near death, or something close to it. His eyes had sagging dark bags underneath them, and his face appeared as if it had aged considerably. He gave out and splashed down on his back, his chest rising and falling with a staggered lurch. His pained heart beat profusely, about to burst through his ribcage. A deep breath, and then an exhale, trying as he might to slow the panicked rise and fall of his chest. It had little effect, and his chest pains continued mercilessly.
Rolling over onto his side and propping himself up, Subaru looked around him. He had gone as far as he could, straight through the forest where they came from. He had one destination in mind, a place where he had to get to, even if it meant the end of his life. He didn’t knowwhyhe wanted to go back there, but he just felt like heneededto.
So, onward he marched quietly, through crooks and crags, rivers and woods—he just kept walking himself to death. He felt like he wanted to die anyway, so that would only be a plus if it did happen. He understood his death was inevitable, as this world he had so recently arrived in has given him nothingbutdeath, yet still it denied him the sweetest nothing at the end of it all. Now, he couldn’t even be close to the last person who mattered to him in this evil world. For it was not the first time the jealous shadow interfered. If he remained near her side, it could mean her death, and that he could not abide. All that was left now was the fading memory of the many peoples who had met their bloody end before himself.
No, that was wrong. He had died a thousand times before—what difference would one last time make? Their memories weren’t fading either. He was lying to himself if he said that. Their faces were burned into his mind unlike anything else—their bloodied corpses and the death rattles they let out in their final moments: he could remember every detail which was burnt so deeply into his mind. He remembered the corpse of Petra, of Frederica, and the fading spirit of Beatrice. And then he remembered her.
He ceased his movements and his eyes widened in sorrow. He fell quietly to his knees as moonlight shone through two hazy clouds overhead. In front of him was the courtyard of Roswaal’s now empty mansion; a place of his nightmares, and of his dreams. He could remember every wonderful moment spent here with Emilia. All those moments with Rem, and her sister, Ram, and everyone else. He could also remember each and every painful death he had experienced here, and all those horrid nightmare he endured in his sleep, playing out there in his mind, never-ending, like the reruns on television from his world.
And as he looked around, he noticed the normal lush green colour of the courtyard had turned a dull brown, a sign the area had once been frozen over. Perhaps it was from the wicked magister’s ice storm, perhaps not. But he could feel a cold chill overtake his body, as he remembered what catastrophe occurred here. In the left centre of the vast courtyard lay two makeshift grave-markers—the final resting place of Petra and Frederica. He had buried them after Elsa and her little accomplice murdered them. That assassin was no doubt still alive, as she had let him live just for him to persist in this tormented world forever.
So he slowly crept up to the graves and stared down at them. For some great time he stood there, gazing at the remains of his former companions. Time passed without a thought, fleeting like the gentle wind which flitted its way through the night sky. He was silent, unmoving—inhumanly so. He dared not make a sound. After quite some time, though he did not know how long, he tore his eyes from the graves and walked into the main entrance of the mansion. He was now convinced of what he must at last do.
The main doorway was pushed open, revealing a mansion that was now empty, just like the rest of his world. It was eerie how the mansion was so still—so vast as it was—yet so empty and alone. It was the perfect allegory for Subaru’s life, its lifelessness and emptiness rivalling even his own.
He withdrew his sword from its sheath. Its blade glimmered under the moon’s glowing illumination. It was a fine blade indeed, sharp enough to cut through any material—certainly enough to cut through his own flesh, like a hot knife slicing its way through butter. He knelt to one knee and placed the pommel of the blade against the ground, pointing the tip directly at his throat. It inched closer, and closer, until he could feel it hovering close enough to make his forehead sweat.
Once before, he had done something like this. It was for the sake of someone close to him. Now, it was for entirely different reasons.
He closed his eyes, swallowed his fear, and then took a deep breath.
Then a bell toll of a voice reverberated through the hallways, wresting him from his determination. From that beautiful sound he had discerned the call of his own name.
The blade clattered to the ground, rattling and sending a piercing ringing throughout the endless corridors of the mansion. It finally came to a rest, and brought with it a silence unlike any other. Because now he wouldn’t move, not even in the slightest. His tongue was caught in his throat, and his mouth dried up so fast he didn’t think he could ever speak. He just knelt there, as the pitter-patter of gentle footsteps came closer and closer to him. He couldn’t turn around, nor could he face her—not now, right here as he had been caught red-handed. He knew his betrayal ran deeper than she could ever understand. After all, he had betrayed himself more than anyone. He wasn’t a hero, but a coward—a spineless, weak, pathetic coward: one who ran away from his problems instead of facing them. And now his back against a wall, he had finally given up, completely, and utterly.
The soft footsteps ceased.
“Subaru, you broke your promise,” she whispered, her voice almost a whimper. “You . . . You left me . . .”
He couldn’t see her expression, but from the broken sounds of her voice, he let his imagination fill in the holes.
Another silence. Her voice had seemingly faltered. She was just as unable to speak as he. Ironically, both of their inadequacies matched each other perfectly right now. Admittedly, it was in these inadequacies they found solace in each other. In all their imperfections, they could find perfection.
Subaru swallowed. “You shouldn’t have followed me,” he finally said, his voice so quiet it was almost inaudible. “Why . . . Why did you come?”
“You are a liar, Subaru,” she accused pointedly. The devastating words came out in quick bursts, like she couldn’t control herself. “You said you would never leave me!”
His body jerked violently in reaction to these words. “It’s not my fault, I didn’t mean to,” he whispered darkly, burying his face in his hands. “I swear, it’s not my fault.” His voice then dropped to a volume which reached no human nor half-elf ears.
His mouth moved, saying, “It’s theyouinside me.”
She stood behind him, her glistening amethyst eyes brimming with tears. Even though he couldn’t see it, he knew from deep within, an unsightly fear was stricken across her face.
This pained him to the core, the very centre of his being, and it tore him apart to hear her speak such things. He didn’t want to be here right now—in fact, he wished only to bedead.
“I swear, I can’t do this anymore,” he uttered, speaking to nobody but himself. Then speaking again, his voice continued to rise with every syllable, until it was almost a shout. “I can’t go on, and if I can’t be with you, I don’t want to breathe anymore!”
His hand reached for the sword on the ground. There was a panicked shriek behind him, and as he clasped it, another hand met his own, pinning it to the ground. Her other arm was wrapped possessively around him, pulling him tightly against her soft chest.
“Please, don’t!” she said in desperation. It was a plea for his life. “Please, no! Please don’t leave me! I need you! I don’t want to be alone. Don’t leave me behind. Stay with me!” Her shouts of distress were almost shrieks. Pleas to keep him alive, to keep him with her.
She had buried her face into his back, sobbing uncontrollably. The tears fell but he couldn’t see them, only could he feel her vice-like grip around him as it tightened. He couldn’t do it, couldn’t struggle anymore, so he gave up all resistance against her will.
He couldn’t fight against her. Anyone but her.
Suddenly, her sobs ceased, her convulsions coming to a still. Then, something in the atmosphere changed, like her demeanour itself had transformed completely. He could feel her hot breath tickling him softly on the back of his neck, and her unique sweet succulent smell was heady. Quickly, he was becoming ever so intoxicated, finding himself under her magical spell yet again.
He was her thrall after all.
“Come here, my love,” she whispered into his ear, nuzzling him with her rosy cheek. “My lovely Subaru . . . touch me like you touched me the night before. I will let you touch me anytime or anywhere—my body is yours.”
Subaru let out an unexpected sigh of relief. Something wonderful was calming him, and it felt like magic. Truthfully, he knew what this intoxicating feeling was. It washermagic, the magic he felt every time he looked at her, but something was different this time.
Emilia snaked her arm around his neck, embracing him, and said, “I’m so happy when I’m with you, Subaru. Remember when you came to see me in the tomb? I wassoootired from the trial, and then you came to see me. I told you the truth then. I am so scared without you. I absolutelymusthave you. I need you more thananything.”
Her voice was so full of emotion. But just like that one fateful night, her words still felt hollow for some reason. It just felt odd, like it wasn’t Emilia herself speaking those words of love. So, whose words were they?
The half-elf shimmied against the tile until she was sitting on her knees in front of him. By this point, she had pressed her entire body against his. And then she gripped his hand and slowly led it to the top of her hair. Subaru did not fight back, nor did he struggle.
“Don’t you love touching my hair, Subaru?” she asked, letting out a giggle as she had done so. “You can touch me anytime now, I promise. In fact, Ireeeallywant you to touch me!”
By now, the girl was stroking her silken hair with his own limp hand. He was lifeless in her arms, almost like a ragdoll; as for some reason, he just couldn’t move. She kept whispering her sweet nothings into his ear, and he remained like that, listening to her silently.
Even so, nothing she said was really ringing any bells within him. It was then Subaru came to a sudden realization. Maybe, justmaybe, Emilia was worse off than he thought. Perhaps even she needed more real comfort than even himself. After all this time, he had been worried about himself, selfish as he always was. He hadn’t changed, and this cruel world he was stuck in didn’t make his selfish desires any less apparent.
He had to fix this, somehow, even if it risked his own life interacting with her.
“Emilia, you can stop now,” he whispered, but she didn’t notice.
A cute smile graced her pretty face, and she said, “Hey, Subaru, we are all alone now. Nobody else is here. It’s just you and me, remember? Puck isn’t here anymore . . . Roswaal isn’t here anymore . . . Rem and Ram, they’re gone too. I’m all yours now.”
“That’s enough, Emilia.”
Subaru’s voice was barely audible and fell on deaf ears once more.
“And the royal selection; you don’t have to worry about that too, remember? We can just run away from Lugnica. Away from all the danger. We can have our own adventures together, just you and me. You can take care of me like you always wanted to! You have my full attention now, Subaru.”
He shut his eyes and tightened his grip on her hand, saying, “I said that’s enough.”
But she was still in her own world.
“Don’t you want to take care of me? I want you to save me, like you saved me before time after time. Just don’t get hurt, okay? We’ve been hurt enough. It’s time for us to relax and forget about all the hurt.”
A sharp pain stretched across his temple, and invited itself into his head. There was a whisper, until he could hear clearly an androgynous voice:
“Make her stop, Subaru,” it pled. “I beg you, please make her stop!”
Subaru clenched his fists, his body shook, and his shoulders hunched over. And then said with booming voice:
“I said cut it out, Emilia!”
She froze in fear. His rage had snapped Emilia from whatever self-induced trance she had locked herself in. She shuddered at the cruelty of his voice, and, cowering away from him, she couldn’t really get far. His grip on her was too strong for her to overcome. Every time she tried to pull away, he jerked her in to make sure she wouldn’t escape.
“You’re hurting me,” she whimpered. There was an unmistakable fear laden in her voice. “Subaru . . . why are you hurting me like this? Please, let me go.”
Hearing this, he blinked his eyes at the small and frail girl who lay before him. Tears were threatening to fall once more from her beautiful amethyst eyes any moment now. She appeared frightened ofhim. Of all people, she was fearful ofhim.
Turning his head away, he uttered, “I’m despicable.”
Dejected as he was, his grip on her loosened. He finally let go, and stared blankly past her, unable to maintain eye contact any longer.
Emilia had been taken aback by Subaru’s words and actions. And even if he didn’t see it, she looked questioningly at his lonesome form.
The half-elf wasn’t entirely in the right state of mind, he realized. Even still, this girl, afraid and alone in this world just as much as he, had given herself completely to him, both physically and emotionally. He had misunderstood it. For sure, it was something he couldn’t quite completely fathom. Before, he mistook her obsessiveness over him a reflection of something other than her own normal self: a state of mind orchestrated by that evil magicians’ manipulations. He told himself that, to rationalize it. He didn’t believe anyone could love him like that. He remembered Rem’s declaration of love to himself, a moment etched to his very soul. It was eerily similar—representing a love he could not completely understand, and so it made him afraid, fearful even.
This time, he wouldn’t make that same mistake again.
They were both crying now. Oh, how it became so routine for them to cry in some way shape or form. He was tired of crying, as was she. It was a symptom of something far more distressing than just sadness, as its freshness was becoming dull, like a rusted blade left out to rot in the rain and sun.
After a moment, he picked up her weightless body and carried her up the main staircase. She did not struggle, nor did she make a sound other than a few whimpers as she wept in his arms.
The signs of carnage which took place here remained, unchanged by the ravages of time. Subaru did his best to avoid the worst areas, such as the dining room. He wouldn’t go back there again. Interestingly, it had only been a few days since then. Even under his oath that he would never return here, he found himself right back in this wretched place once again.
Long would it be, before the sun finally arose, and he knew of one room left untouched to the massacre which took place here.
Holding Emilia deftly in one arm, he maneuvered the jewel adorned doorknob with his free hand. Slowly, the door crept open, revealing a master bedroom large enough and made for a lady of vast wealth. It was Emilia’s old bedroom, locked away from the events which shook everything inhabiting this very mansion. He set her down carefully onto the well-acquainted bed. Moonlight cascaded through the large windows, filling the room with a hazy glow. Subaru reached under and brought the silk covers up over her in a small gesture of kindness. No doubt this one intricately-designed room cost a small fortune, a sign of the Mathers’ infinite wealth. It was no doubt fit for royalty.
Emilia was wordless as he continued these movements. By now, the last of her tears had finally fallen, and the shock of his rejection passed over her like leaves falling lazily from a tree. So instead, she gazed at him with a suspicious expression in return for his efforts.
Not even moments ago, he was about to end his life, Emilia realized, and his aggressive behaviour was nothing short of surprising to her. Something waswrongwith Subaru, she figured, but she didn’t know what. There were many times before, when she could see the suffering written upon his face, but even still he could not tell her what was bothering him. Maybe, just maybe, she could finally get some answers now.
As one of Subaru’s tears fell sombrely to her lap, he felt several gentle fingers wrap around his own.
Emilia tilted her head at Subaru questioningly and said: “Subaru, can you tell me what’s wrong?” Her voice was soft, and full of worry.
He stared miserably at the tiny, warm hand wrapped around his own lifeless and unmoving digits. He frowned and shook his head. In return, she nudged her curious face closer to his, silently prodding him to speak up.
“No, I . . . I just can’t,” he uttered, burying his face in the palms of his hand. “Emilia, I’m so sorry. I won’t ever leave you again, I promise you I won’t.” There was a brief pause and a moment’s thought before he changed his mind. “It’s just that . . .” he started, a quick break stifling his words, followed by a sob. He struggled immensely to choke out the words he so desperately wanted to release.
Emilia gave him another reassuring squeeze, indicating it was okay to go forward with what he was about to say. She was ready for anything he had to tell her.
“It’s just that—” he continued, his voice barely a murmur now. And now another pause, this time longer, Subaru was very close to admitting a painful truth. What he struggled to say was more difficult than any confession. With a preparatory swallow, he at last said: “I have been using the power of Return by—”
He hesitated before finishing the forbidden words.
Suddenly, the room darkened as if the moon outside had been covered with a vast blanket, and the walls of the room closed slowly in on him. The air became thicker and more distasteful than it had been before. Then, a ghastly voice crept its way inside his mind.
The voice was tender, yet twisted. “I will not allow you to speak anymore,” it whispered. “You cannot reveal our most guarded secret, my love.”
As quick as it came, the eerie sound vanished, and then time itself stood still. And as if to savour the moment, five shadowy arms reached out slowly from around him, until they finally rested around the silver-haired half-elf in front of him. Two hands clasped her throat, another her head, and the others held her arms down. Particles of gloom spilled over the soft contours of her body.
Subaru buried his face into the palm of his hands. “No . . . please,” he begged whatever lay behind the darkness. “Please just kill me instead!”
The hopeless and defeat of his voice gave credence to his resignation before the shadowy being which resided inside of him. The tryst between him and Emilia was beckoning to an end.
But ignoring him, the hands tightened their grasp on her throat, suffocating her. Her mouth opened slightly in response to the applied pressure to her windpipe. Another hand pulled her head upwards slowly, so it might abnormally stretch her neck. The others held her down against the bed. Very soon, her head would be pulled right off, and if not, surely, she would be throttled.
Realizing this, a rage spread across Subaru’s face. Pure, blind rage. His brow furrowed, and his face warped into a snarl fiercer and more bloodthirsty unlike any other. Then, he roared in agony, his voice cracking from the strain on his voice:
“—Satella!”
And as this hoarse voice past into memory, there was a flash of light, and the darkened world brightened once more.
Whatever magic pulling the passages of time back far enough to where water no longer flowed, ceased to be. Time was moving forward again, Subaru was certain of this, because his teardrops were falling onto Emilia’s sleeping face. They dripped steadily down her cheeks, one after another as they fell solemnly.
Subaru blinked his eyes as he came back to reality. He found himself straddling her sleeping form unknowingly. His hands, which were clasped around her throat, loosened as he realized what he was doing. He had no idea how he arrived in this position, but it didn’t matter now. He fell flatly onto her unconscious body, letting the close contact of the half-elf wash away all worry and anxiety from his being. He buried his face into the crook of her neck, and shut his eyes.
He was tired and faced with an immeasurable amount of emotions, that which no one should ever have to be concerned with. There was a time when he thought, that somehow, he could find peace in this world where none could be found. Maybe that future had long grew distant, to the point of being unreachable.
The latitudes he was faced with when deciding his fate in this world were next to nothing. Ever since he found himself here, his destiny had been shaped by something otherworldly and ungodly, resurrecting him over and over until the pathway he had chosen was that of someone not his own. If he couldn’t be allowed to make his own decisions, then he would rather not exist at all.
He let out a sigh fuller and deeper than any ever before, one echoing a promise he had made to himself. A promise to take control of his life, to shape his destiny, and to write his own story. It was a story in which he yearned for an ending exuberating happiness. Possibly, just possibly, he could find that ending.
He smiled softly to himself and muttered something about the sleeping girl resting so carelessly underneath him. Her undying declarations of love to him: thricehe had received them. The first time he scoffed at her, tossing away the possibility those words could ever be hers. He feared such love. He feared what he did not understand. By now, he finally understood that love for him.
Suddenly, Subaru shivered, and he cuddled closer to the girl underneath him. He cracked open one eye, wondering why the temperature of the room had dropped so suddenly. Then, he saw something he wouldn’t ever have expected.
There, nestled beside the two of them, was a small grey cat he had come to know very well. His folded left ear twitched as he narrowed his sapphire jewelled eyes at Subaru, who otherwise stared at him in shock.
“Pu-Pu-Puck!” Subaru sputtered hopelessly at the intruding spirit.
The little cat raised one of his paws to his mouth, imitating ashushing gesture to Subaru. One of his eyes closed in a cheeky wink, forcing Subaru’s expression to collapse even further.
“You shouldn’t wake Lia,” the spirit advised, pointing his other paw teasingly at the sleeping girl Subaru now so awkwardly laid upon. “She’s been through a lot, so you should just let her sleep.”
Subaru frowned. “How long have you been with us?” he asked the Great Spirit. “I remember, at the burning village. I saw you—”
“Ah, I remember,” he interrupted Subaru before he could finish. “I was much weaker than I am presently. Now, I can retain my physical shape once more, but only for . . . a little bit.” The cat slowed his speech to let out a slow, sleepy yawn, one which made even Subaru want to take a nap.
And he asked: “But why? Why did you vanish?”
“Because I didn’t have a choice,” answered Puck. “If I didn’t break my contract with Lia, she would have never succeeded in the trial. But it looks like that wasn’t necessary, now was it?” The cat unceremoniously floated up and rested on Subaru’s shoulder. He gave him a nudge with his paw, saying, “Thanks to you, Lia was able to survive all that trouble, and now, she carries something she has never had before.”
“What do you mean?” Subaru asked, clearly confused.
“The love for another,” he said, his words chosen carefully. “A love not for that of a parent, but that of a man. It is something I could never to give Lia, even if she could never understand. It was painful for me to let her go. But I had to, you see: to give her something greater than myself. To give her a real reason to keep on living, so she might carry dreams for the future, other than those which aren’t her own.”
He realized Puck was giving him his blessing, and for that, he was innumerably thankful. He would not waste it, he promised silently to himself. Subaru only nodded in understanding.
“Thank you,” he replied.
It was a short and curt statement. What else could he possibly say?
“Don’t thank me, Subaru!” Puck said. “I wouldn’t have chosen you if I didn’t think you weren’t the one. When Lia suffers nightmares, I expect you to be the one to calm her. When Lia is lonely, I fully expect you to be the one to hold her hand. It’s up to you now, you know?”
“I know!” Subaru said, smiling and flashing Puck an assuring thumbs up.
Puck smiled, bared his teeth at him, and said, “Good . . . because if you don’t!”
He drew his paw across his throat in a threatening manner.
And Subaru knew the cat was deadly serious. His eyes exploded in reminiscence of his past deaths at the hands of this playful creature. But he shook his hands in dismissal and waved him off.
“No, you don’t have to tell me that,” he said, and with determined eyes. “I know now what I have to do.”
Puck struggled to stifle a yawn, signifying it was probably time for bed for both cats and humans, and elves. But before that, his eyes narrowed to slits; and then he uttered something which would haunt him for the foreseeable future:
“Let’s get some sleep. It should be safe now that the witch is gone. Right, Subaru?”
His breathing hitched and he choked on something in his throat. Sweat beaded between the creases of his forehead, and the cool air emanating from the floating cat rescinded to a level of heat which burned into his skin.
He opened his mouth to speak, his voice a stuttering mess: “What. . . did you just . . . say?”
“I said we should sleep. That would be the smart thing to do, so we don’t wake Lia.” The cat rest itself on the bed, curling up into a small ball of fuzz.
“No . . .beforethat,” Subaru replied.
But it was useless, as the cat was now fast asleep, his consciousness fading quicker than he wanted. And yet Subaru had discovered something extraordinary. Heknew. He knew his secret! Only one other person was privy to such knowledge, or evensuspected—but even that person did not know why or how. And he was ultimately dead now.
Puck knew it all.
Very soon, Subaru was overtaken by these grave thoughts, and before long, he was pulled into the unrelenting grips of sleep.
And his dream was like a vast, endless body of water, as unchanging and formless as the moonless night sky which watched over it. Yet, the stars of that night sky twinkled and shimmered ever so fervently, dotting the ocean with orbs of amber and gold.
It was something which existed only within the confines of his mind. In a place where time, physicality and other worldly ideas dared not tread, and because of this, his dream became a nightmare.
He wanted to go back to the world of the awake, to be free from the endlessness and uncertainty of himself. Here, within his own mind, was where he doubted himself the most. It was the place where a constant battle was fought, not against witch cultists, or bandits, or anyone else who may threaten him in the waking world—here, he spent eternity in strife with himself, constantly locked in a losing battle against his will.
He fell into the murky bottomless water, and down he sank. Further and further he dropped, until the light of the stars faded for good and left him shrouded in a darkness no human eye could see. Down here, there was nothing. It was a place bereft of all sound, sight, and feeling. It was almost like every sense he had come to know, plus love, was deafened. In its stead, a sinister and otherworldly vacancy sent shivers down his spine.
He curled up into a ball and resigned himself to his unlucky fate and sorrowful existence. There he remained for what felt like an eternity, before suddenly, he heard a voice.
His eyes opened, straining to identify the noise in his mind. Was this voice his own? Yes, it had to be his, who else could it have been? He wanted to scream out loud, but no noise escaped his mouth. In fact, his mouth did not open at all, as if it had been sewn shut. He strained himself further, but was met with only silence.
Am I . . . asleep?he wondered. Ah, he realized finally. It was just another dream; a dream where he was drowning in despair and rendered devoid of happiness. He had these dreams often, even when the waning moments preceding them were enjoyable and positive.
He blinked his eyes and shook his head to try and wake himself, but to no avail, locked as he was in this world of nothingness. Taking a good look of his surroundings, he could barely tell which direction was up or down. In this world removed from reality, direction was almost impossible to discern, as was any colour, shape or form.
Would there be serendipity if he escaped this bottomless prison he had been tossed so carelessly into? He didn’t know, but there was only one way to find out.
Subaru pushed hard and kicked his feet with all his might. He was never a good swimmer, but here, in his mind, he could be anything he wanted. Faster, faster, he could feel he was travelling upward. Even though he could not see, he felt something deep inside which told him this was the right direction. The pressure of the depths began to relieve itself, and as he struggled more and more, he found he could finally see the blinking stars breaking through the crest of the ocean. He was going to break through the surface any moment now!
And he awoke with his brow sweating and heart punching against his chest. He heaved air in and out, his lungs hopelessly bellowing and stoking a dwindling fire. His eyes darted from side to side, scanning one end of the decorative room to another. He was back in Emilia’s old bedroom: in the Mathers mansion, no less.
The memory of the occurrences from the night before came back to him swiftly: the blade pointing at his neck, Emilia’s plea for him to stop, Puck, and then finally the realization.
Subaru jerked forward and clutched his chest. Had the witchfinallyleft him alone? Could itreallybe true? He shook his head sceptically and dismissed the eager thoughts, then laid back onto the bed and stared blankly at the carved wooded ceiling. Thoughts consumed him, and soon enough, he found himself trapped in a deep introspection.
His mind drifted from one memory to the next, searching for answers and clues to what and why this was happening to him. He could remember all the times he had died and used Return by Death to seemingly resurrect himself in order to try again. Without it, he would not have made it five minutes into this newfound world he had so unexpectedly entered. He remembered the numerous times he had tried to tell others about his ability, and the devastating effect it had on either him or his close friends. Each Return by Death had its similarities. First, there was a death, then a black void, and finally, he found himself sent back in time to a certain checkpoint he had acquired.
There was no rhyme or reason to the time selected, and he could find no answer to his questions. Further, as he lay in bed, he ruminated deeply about his past, until he came to a sudden realization: There was a gap in his memory,one which he previously had not given too much thought to it at all.
His mind returned to the bloody night of the Great Hare. In his desperation, he had raced back to the Sanctuary, and soon found himself in front of the dark magician himself. Carelessly, the powerful mage dispatched both Ram and Garfiel in the vilest way possible. He then revealed his nefarious intentions and his knowledge of Subaru’s Return by Death, before being torn apart by hundreds of white rabbits and their razor-sharp teeth.
The mage had simply given up on this world, and this doomed timeline they found themselves in. He did not even partially consider the fact he’d be entirely erased from existence—in fact, it had not entered his consideration at all. His indifference to his own gruesome death couldn’t be described as anything other than the most inane, pure quality of madness and absurdity—one which the current Subaru, to his horror, shared.
He remembered stumbling out of the doorway backwards, witnessing the last smile upon the magician’s face. It was his dying declaration, and he truly believed Subaru would once again Return by Death, and then set things right with his newfound knowledge. But the Lewes clones had utterly abandoned him, fleeing in different directions, and because of that, he no longer had any protection from the rabbits surging in from all different directions. In a futile effort, he turned and ran as fast as his mortal body could let him.
Briefly breaking from his trance, Subaru’s eyes widened and sweat dripped from the corner of his brow.
He remembered now: it was the moment before he went back to the tomb in order to rescue Emilia. He had fallen unconscious far before he reached his destination. And it wasn’t from the sight of the stoic magician being ripped into pieces, or the thoughts of Rem being devoured by the beast. No, it wasn’t any of those things. Something otherworldly had overtaken him once he neared the entrance of Echidna’s final resting place.
It felt like it always did, like his soul was being ripped from him, akin to the sensation of Return by Death. Except, this time, hedid notReturn by Death—something quite the opposite, in fact.
No matter how crazed he ran, he couldn’t outrun the Great Hare. It had caught up to him, nipping at his feet, and soon consuming him piece by piece. One of the Hares had broken through into his stomach and gnawed its way through his internal organs. He forged on anyway, each footstep becoming lighter than the last as the beast shed more weight from his body.
It was pointless to run, but he knew of nothing else to do. It was simple—running away from his problems was something he had grown accustomed to; it’s all he’d known. And in this time of peril, he knew of nothing else other than to reach the only person left in this world who mattered to him; and there he would finally collapse in her arms and die another cold, bitter death.
But the beasts did not care for that desire. They ripped and tore at his innards, and finally a cavity opened near his abdomen, spilling his organs onto the snow. A line of entrails followed Subaru as he took his last steps. Rabbits from all directions flung themselves on the forgotten organs, starved for a thousand years. And as Subaru continued, the world around him started to fade. He plummeted to the snowy ground unceremoniously, spewing the hares aside. Not to be abated for long, the rabbits plunged into Subaru once more, ripping him apart through and through. One rabbit ripped his left hand from its joint and scampered off into the night with it. Another rabbit took his eye, and another danced from finger to finger until only bloody nubs remained. In the corner of his remaining eye, he could see a couple of blood-stained rabbits popping their heads in and out of his abdomen, their striking red eyes filled with disappointment at the lack of flesh for them to devour.
Soon, there wasn’t much left of Subaru. The faint glimmer in his eye dulled, and the light of the world grew fainter, until only a shadow remained. Subaru’s one eye rolled over and closed for a final time, and he found himself shrouded in darkness yet again. It was that sweet release from the pain and suffering, and then followed the odd sensation of Return by Death. His demise beckoned him once again. There was a momentarily pause of thought, as his life functions thankfully ceased at last. Then following this was blinding light, and a cold, fierce rush of wind jerked him from his trance.
His eyes opened once more. Curiously enough, Subaru lay face down in a snow, which previously, had been painted red with blood, viscera and other remnants of his body. Now, it was as fresh as the snow currently descending from the night sky.
He turned over onto his back and sat up, his eyes peering from left to right, examining his surroundings carefully. Around him, there was nothing. The magical snow still fell as fast as ever, the wind howled furiously, but there was no sign of the Hare which had just consumed every bit of his body.
It would have appeared the Great Hare made short work of him and left the scene promptly in order to find more prey. He could still hear the shouts and screams of the villagers in the distance as they no doubt fell victim to the Hare’s razor-sharp fangs.
But the question remained, why had Return by Death sent him to this moment? The lack of signs from the Hare was jarring indeed. Was he in the future? He certainly did not return to the past, like he normally should have. If this was the future, then wouldn’t the snow be painted red with his blood? It’s almost as if—
Suddenly, Subaru’s face contorted into something hideously disturbed. His normally-vibrant eyes turned lifeless, and his expression rapidly regressed to be something horrible to look upon.
Slowly, his mouth uttered a horrendous realization:
“Rem—”
There was silence, and then the name came from his lips once more.Rem, Rem, Rem, Rem,he had repeated. He kept saying her name over and over as if it were the only word he knew. With every syllable came a growing desperation which was like any other. Soon, his voice of disbelief turned to anger, and he let out a sorrowful yell that drowned out even the shrill shrieks of the wind. His body twisted and turned, and he rolled around in a childish tantrum on the young snow. His yelling turned to sobbing, and then his sobbing turned to low moans of anguish. It could only be described as a total loss of physical and mental control. His mind was registering a bereavement so powerful it tortured him more than the thousand deaths he had endured so far, and even if he suffered them all at once. After a long while, his convulsing ceased, and he froze in place as he stared blankly into the moonless night. There, he lay as still as an ancient long-lost marble statue as the snow fell lazily from the skies.
“Emilia!” he said.
The name was spoken, but none would know of it. His weakened voice was drowned out in the roaring of the ice storm which encompassed the Sanctuary. And now determined than ever, Subaru turned his head toward the entrance of the witches’ tomb. He could see the faint glowing aura of the main doorway from where he lay. He clenched his fist and furrowed his brow. His body was battered more than ever before, and his energy was spent, but he had just enough in his reserves to do what must be done.
He had lost almost every meaningful thing to him—his parents, his friends, even the girl who loved him more than anyone. But somethingwas different this time—he could tell the cosmic presence inside him, that dark figure which oozed a miasma of evil, was gone. If she was gone without word or explanation, then who would be there to help him cheat death like he had done so many times before? He could not risk death again, and if it happened, he might not return at all.
He had one more chance, and as doomed as this world was, there was still reason for him to draw breath. Quickly, he pushed himself up and took a step forward, disappearing into the torrent of blistering cold.
The world twisted and malformed into darkness yet again, and once more, he was greeted with the familiar wood carved ceiling of a jewel adorned mansion.
As he got up from the bed, he was greeted with the sound of the door cracking open slowly. A small hand crept around the door as its owner pushed it open far enough for her to peek around and peer into the room.
“Su-Subaru?” Emilia stammered. “Are you awake?”
Subaru stood there silently, gazing blankly at his unsure guest. Her nervousness was evident on her expression too. He scratched his head and sighed deeply.
“Hey there, Emilia,” he said, his voice just as quiet as hers, but gaining more confidence with every syllable. “How are you feeling?”
The young half-elf was caught off-guard by his question, and she found there was a catch in her voice, stifling her response. She shimmied around the door before making eye contact.
And she said, coming into full view: “Well, I kind of have a headache, but . . .” She was clutching her wrist behind her back, indicating her nervousness. “Please, don’t worry about me! I’m more concerned about you, Subaru.”
The hint of worry in her voice was legitimate. Her voice was very soft, and unusually unassertive. Sure, her tone was typically soft, butneverinsecure. He must have made her worried sick about him. How long had he been unconscious? What had she been doing all this time? These were questions he would have liked immediate answers to.
She smiled at him and inched closer to where Subaru stood, closing the distance between them to about halfway.
Subaru chose to go with the latter question. “I’m okay, Emilia . . . I’m fine, I really am,” he said as he flashed her a quick, but assuring faux smile, and then spoke again: “Say, Emilia, what have you been doing around here while I’ve been sleeping?”
Emilia looked at the floor briefly, before responding, saying, “Erm . . . well, you see. With the mansion abandoned, there really isn’t a lot to do around here. I mostly spent my time speaking with the lesser spirits, gathering supplies, and . . .”
Her voice trailed off hesitantly and never recovered.
For a long moment, there was silence about the room. Subaru eyed his half-elf partner with careful, steady eyes, but her facial expression was icy and betrayed no emotion to him. Finally, after some time, Emilia’s lips trembled slightly and a small cry escaped her mouth, breaking the quiet.
Approaching carefully, Subaru took the crestfallen girl by her arm in a consoling manner and led her to the bed. He gently lowered her down and took a seat next to her as she now sobbed softly next to him.
He had no idea what was bothering her, but he could tell whatever it was had impacted her greatly. It was not often he saw something disturb Emilia so much like this, other than when she was attempting the trials at the witches’ tomb. He could remember quite vividly how he found her splayed out upon the tomb floor, in an utterly disconsolate state.
After her small and irregular sobs ceased, Subaru found the courage to speak. And he said: “Tell me, Emilia.”
His voice was both nurturing and caring. And as he whispered this into her ear, he stroked her head and drew careful circles along the contours of her back. But Emilia closed her eyes in dejection. Next to him, she stayed silent for quite some time, and her response seemingly would never come. She rested her head on Subaru’s shoulder and nestled closely against him.
It was minutes before she spoke.
“I saw their graves,” she finally admitted, her voice sullen—and mournful. “Even though they were unmarked, the lesser spirits told me who they belonged to . . .”
Subaru’s face turned downcast, and he couldn’t find the will to meet her swirling amethyst eyes with his own gaze.
She had no doubt discovered the makeshift graves of both Petra and Frederica, which he had haphazardly erected after they were slaughtered. Thereshouldbe three—if there were any remains of Beatrice. These deaths were his own fault, and he truly felt responsible for what had happened. He had numerous opportunities to keep them alive and find a pathway to life for all his friends, but he had failed. Their deaths rested squarely on his own shoulders, and for that, he would keep their memory with him wherever he travelled, and until the end of his days.
And moments later, his whisper broke their silence:
“It’s all my fault,” Subaru confessed, before pausing momentarily. His voice was a barely audible to his partner who sat just inches from himself. “If I had done something more to protect them, they would still be here. If I had only made the right choices, instead of the wrong ones, everyone would still be alive. If only I had been faster. If only, if only, if only!” His voice grew bleaker with every repetition, and soon he paused once more, before continuing with a confession. “I had so many chances, Emilia, don’t you see? I had every given opportunity to set things right, and save the day, but I f*cked it all up. I wish you knew how worthless I really was. I wish you knew how many times I found ways to get myself killed—or worse, everyone around me. If I wasn’t so powerless, maybe I could have protected them.”
Subaru’s voice grew hoarser and hoarser with every word. By now, his mouth was dry, his emotions filling it with a rawness he had long lost control of.
Emilia was confused, yet did nothing but sit next to him and absorb his ill-timed confession as if she understood him. Soon, she realized, Subaru was now weeping, his emotions let loose like dam which had finally been broken.
“You just don’t know, Emilia,” he said. “You don’t know, nobody does. Nobody can understand me! Why can’t anyone understand me? Why?”
This question wasn’t posed toward Emilia or anyone else, but himself.
And the grief which filled the room was now palpable. Emilia was ill-accustomed to seeing Subaru in such a broken-down state of mind. This wasnotnormal, she knew that. And those words he spoke: they made little to no sense to her. What ‘chances’ were he talking about? To her knowledge, he had never failed to do anything, and the only lives lost were those just recently in the past week.
She brushed aside those questioning thoughts and passed it off as Subaru just being so distraught, he knew not what he was saying—that was the only rational explanation she could come up with his confession. What he was saying, it was simply not possible. It shouldn’t be possible. How could he live more than once? How could he have died before, and still be sitting next to her—warm, full of life, and filled with emotion?
So with great care, she touched his chin with her fingertips and lifted him to meet her at eye level. His swirling hazel orbs were so full of pain; they were red, swollen, and dotted with teardrops which had yet to fall. It was a distressing sight, and with it, she knew her grief paled in comparison to his own. Emilia just continued to stare into his pained hazel eyes. Her other hand snaked up his neck and along his cheek before it spread itself across the side of his head in a loving caress.
It was there she held his posture until she found the willpower to say something.
“I don’t understand, Subaru,” she said, her voice as tender and caring as she could conjure. “But even though I know not why, I will do everything I can to be there for you and make you smile again. Because, without your smile, I can’t smile. And without you, I don’t want to be here any longer.”
Subaru absorbed her words with as much thought as he could give anything in the world. Just like all those times before, her soothing voice lulled him into a trance like state unlike any other. Soon, his breathing returned to something more normal and his mind appeared to cool to a level where he could now properly think with rationality.
For a long time, Subaru stayed silent as he considered both her words and what he had confessed to her.
What was most concerning to him, is he had unintentionally confessed his power of Return by Death to Emilia, risking both his life and her own. Yet, she sat just next to him, her heart still beating, full of life as it should. There was no sign of Satella, nor was there a crushing pain in his chest, or a dark miasma covering the area in darkness. Most of all, that cold chill which ran down his spine anytime the witch revealed her presence, was nowhere to be found. To put it quite succinctly, everything was normal.
Subaru swallowed. He really had confessed his most confidential secret to Emilia. His mind was so overcome by emotion, by irrational thought, that he didn’t really consider a single word which escaped his mouth. Fortunately, he did not even know if she understood anything he had said.
To the regular individual, speaking of second chances and dying numerous times would fall on deaf ears more often than not. No, it would be even worse. He would be dismissed as insane, and from then onwards anything he said would be taken with the lightest grain of salt. The truth was, he hoped this conversation would be dropped for good, so he wouldn’t have to explain himself again. He couldn’t risk speaking about his former ability in more detail. Any mention of it would constantly put himself or his only reason for living at great peril. For sure he would love to share his plight with Emilia, but it was indeed his plight no more. He was no longer burdened with Return by Death, and for that, he could now live a ‘normal’ life again.
Subaru gave Emilia a slight nod, then pressed his lips against her forehead, nestling himself against her in an act of understanding. Moments passed without much vocal interaction, as the two lovers snuggled up against each other.
His small gestures of love spoke louder and cut deeper than anything he could say to her. Not only was it their personal method of communication, but what words could he say to her anyway? What she said, he already knew, and what he could tell her, she could not possibly understand, nor did he want her to. The risk was simply too great.
Even so, Emilia truly did understand what Subaru was going through, without even fully grasping the surrounding circ*mstance. Sure, she had questions of her own, but she hoped that in time, they would be answered at the pace Subaru was comfortable at. She could tell that something was affecting him so greatly it could not be mended with just a few words or small acts of love. So Emilia would not press him further on the matter, she decided. She would let him come to her, as she always had. Until then, she would give him as much love and comfort as she could, no matter what or how things turned out. She wanted to be there for him, as he had been there for her so many times before. She turned and burrowed her face into his chest.
The past week had been an emotional roller-coaster for both Subaru and her. It felt like no matter what they did or where they went, misfortune would still be waiting for them around every corner. Somehow, she just wanted to get away from it all and put the past behind her, as she had always done before. Someday, her life would be peaceful and happy.
With just the two of them, sheknewit could happen.
Her thoughts turned to tranquil things, to pleasant wishes and dreams for the future, and her furrowed brow and strained face was replaced with a calm repose. In her mind, she could see blue skies, and a peaceful river; even a log cabin by the river, and a cool, gentle breeze which blew the trees with an almost metronome like rhythm. Emilia’s eyes lidded slightly, and the rise and fall of her chest began to stabilize. Soon, her eyes shut and did not reopen.
Subaru, taking notice of his lover unexpectedly going limp in his arms, gently scooted out from under her grasp. He observed her resting form and sighed to himself. How tired was she if she fell asleep so easily like that?
The silence in the room stretched on while Subaru stood by and thought to himself. Soon, he turned around and went on his way, finding himself in one of the mansion’s long hallways. It was an eerie feeling. Eerie at just how empty and deserted the mansion felt, now that all its inhabitants had been killed off. Just a footstep sent echoes down the long chambers, and you could hear a pin drop from one end of the mansion to the other.
Subaru collected his thoughts as best he could. His mind was still swirling with questions about Satella, Puck, and not to mention the events from the weeks past. Slowly, he walked down the hallway leading to the main entrance of the mansion. His stomach growled painfully, making him realize he was starving.
He then decided his first stop would be the kitchen.
Sometime later, Subaru emerged from the hallways and into the grand hall. Thrown over his back was a sack filled full of appas, pepples, cheese, and other vegetables he found stored in the kitchen’s storeroom. Luckily enough, it appeared some magic was cast over it to keep it from ever spoiling.
There was a treasure trove-like amount of food in there it could feed them for months if they so pleased. Sure enough, the growling of his stomach had ceased, and he found himself unconditionally full because of how much he had gorged himself on the endless delights of the mansion.
Rays of bright orange bled through the glass windows of the mansion. It was now late in the day and the sun was apparently setting. He didn’t quite know how long he had been asleep yet, but it must have been more than twelve hours. And since then, he had found food and other supplies they could use when they go back to their travels. He had also gathered his belongings and retrieved his forgotten sword which was left near the front door of the mansion. He figured once Emilia awakened, they would leave this place, and hopefully for good. He didn’t want to spend any more time here than they needed to, and he felt they were already here far longer than they should be.
Then soft footsteps resonated behind him. He turned to meet the familiar face of Emilia, who was rubbing the sleep out of her eyes.
“Hey, Emilia,” he called.
His voice was both reassuring and positive.
While rubbing her sleepy eyes, Emilia said, “Subaru, I’msooosorry. I don’t know what came over me . . . I guess I was more tired than I thought I was.”
“Well, I’ll say,” he quipped in his usual witty way, before continuing. “You followed me all the way here, remember? Here, catch.”
Subaru tossed her a fleshy appa he had in his hand. Emilia caught it clumsily and stared at it carefully. It was a bright red colour, clearly fresh and ready to eat.
“An appa?” she asked, taken aback by the strange foreign fruit. She let out a giggle. “You remembered not to give me a pepple this time, didn’t you? Ireeeallydon’t like those!”
Laughing quietly, Subaru waved her off in a cool way. “I may make mistakes, but I try not to make the same mistakes twice, you know?”
Emilia took a bite of the appa, and promptly swooned. It tasted delicious, especially because of how hungry she was. Pausing between bites, she whispered, “Thank you, Subaru. You really do think of everything.”
By now the orange glow outside had faded to a gloomier pale-blue colour. After Emilia had finished her appa, she walked over to Subaru and took him by his hand, catching him off guard. Then she turned her gaze toward the entrance of the mansion. Turning her head back to him and giving him a soft smile, she said, with a gentle voice: “Come with me, I want to show you something, Subaru.”
Her smile was the most angelic, loveliest thing he had ever laid his eyes on. When he was under stress, he found calm in her smile. When things were at their worst, her smile brought him back from the deepest recesses of darkness. Without really knowing it, he found himself following her out the door, and to the graves which sat near the centre of the mansion garden. Overhead, the cloudless sky allowed the moon to bask the entire area in a low-lit moonlight. It was pleasant out, as the sounds of the night contrasted heavily with the dark, depressing mood of the abandoned mansion.
Emilia and Subaru stopped in front of the two graves. They were not so familiar from when he last left them in their makeshift form. Before, they were just two sticks of wood jutting out of the ground haphazardly. Now, in their place, were two headstones made of rock, with the names’Frederica Baumann’and’Petra Leyte’etched out carefully along its base.
Subaru knelt softly beside Petra’s grave and ran his fingers across its name as if he were caressing the young girl herself. He turned to Emilia and gave her a teary-eyed smile. It was both happiness and sadness which encapsulated him.
“You made these?” he asked, his voice faltering ever so slightly. “These are beautiful, Emilia. What I had here before, I put together in only a few minutes. I didn’t have enough time to give them a proper burial. I had to get back to the Sanctuary before . . .” His voice trailed off as he unexpectedly lost his power of speech.
Shyly, Emilia said, “Yes, well. . .sort of. These headstones were already here at the mansion, hidden in the main storeroom. I just etched their names into them with my ice magic. I decided it was proper we mark their final resting place in the most appropriate way. I’m sorry I could not get them something better.”
“These are already perfect,” Subaru said, pausing a moment before turning his back to her. There was a heavy thickness in his throat as he continued further. “You don’t have to be sorry about anything. If anyone needs to be sorry, it’s me for letting this happen to them.”
Emilia could tell the pain in his voice had returned from earlier. He really did feel he was to blame for their untimely demise. Even without seeing his face right now, she knew he bore a pained expression which made her heart sink below water. She slowly reached over and touched him on the shoulder. It was a simple touch which served to remind him he wasn’t as much of a failure as he thought he was—quite the opposite for her, in fact. He was herheronow, herknight, and herprotector. He had to be strong for her, and if he couldn’t, she would be strong for him, and show him the way forward.
“I know you feel so much pain for what happened,” Emilia said, choosing her words very carefully. “But to me, Subaru, you are everything—remember that, please. If you ever feel hurt, or unsure about yourself, I want you to know, you are my world now.”
Subaru turned, and his shocked expression locked with her soft, gentle gaze. For the first time, he looked further into her deep swirling purple eyes than he ever had before. There, he saw not the Witch Satella, or the mysterious sorcerer half-elf he met on his first day in Lugnica.
No, this time, he saw the true Emilia.
Seconds passed, and soon Subaru found himself falling in love with her again a thousand times over. He threw his arms around her with such force it threatened to knock her to the floor. It was a desperate, flailing hug as if he were about to be separated from her for the rest of his life.
“Emilia, I love you so much!” he exclaimed.
She just nodded and smiled to herself, returning the hug in kind with her own as he burrowed his face into her neck. He absorbed her enchanting smell with a long, drawn-out breath against the cream of her skin. He could get used to being this close to her.
It was only now he realized how stupid he had been. He could not leave this world, not in death, or despair, or in any way. He must stay here, for her. He must give her everything he has to offer, even if it didn’t amount to much. She had saved his life, and in more ways than one. Physically, she had saved him before, but mentally, she had rescued him from near death more than she could ever understand.
Her importance could not go understated, not anymore.
He would make it well known to her she completed him just as much as he completed her.
Moments passed before Subaru found his voice again. “I’m so, so sorry,” he apologized, his voice breaking, but he continued anyway, “I’m sorry for everything. . .Emilia.”
More tears fell, but not tears of sadness. They were tears of unabashed joy.
He kept whispering how sorry he was into her pointed ear, and it tickled her. Emilia let out a giggle and whispered back to him, “You don’t have to be sorry, Subaru.”
“I’m so sorry for what I did,” Subaru said, his voice as low as a whisper passing through a noisy tavern. “I’m sorry for betraying your trust, Emilia. From now on, I promise, until this heart in my chest stops beating, and I’m long dead, that I will never, ever, leave you!”
And Emilia smiled softly, saying, “I know!”
She smiled to him in such a way he knew she understood him. She believed him, she trusted him, and shelovedhim. All these things were true, because this smile was something she gave to him only.
His audible vow was made, yes; but the solemn vow he made in his heart, would be known only to himself. He wasn’t Natsuki Subaru, the shut-in, any longer; from now on, he was Natsuki Subaru, lover and partner of the half-elf, Emilia.
Now he wasn’t alone, and his decisions could not be determined just by himself. Rather, his decisions from now on would be in the interests of her, and her alone.
Chapter 5: Interlude Under a Lugnican Sky
Chapter Text
A gentle zephyr rolled through the scented Lugnican air, causing the scarlet royal dragon banners overhead to flap momentarily, before they became still once more. Fruit vendors, fish peddlers, butchers, and craftsmen of all trades lined the edges of the cobblestone lane: the central one which led to the Royal Castle. During the season of the red-sun, the weather was hot, and humid, but agreeable nonetheless.
Already, just half past noon, there were wagons being pulled by ground-dragons flooding the roads. The sounds of all the hustle and bustle were deafening to all, except those few blessed with the Divine Protection of Acoustic Resistance. And amongst the hurried crowds, a young, black-haired man stood silently, staring intensely at the signpost in front of him, struggling to read the foreign glyphs he had taken so much time to learn. His eyes narrowed as he translated the glyphs slowly into his own native language, but due to them being I-script, it took longer than he would have liked.
‘Margrave Mathers Missing—Royal Selection Candidate Presumed Dead!’ he read, suddenly realizing the news of what happened at the Sanctuary was only just now reaching the general populace.
Subaru heard quick, light footsteps coming from behind him—then a voice filled with contempt:
“So that half-demon is dead, huh?”
Hearing this new voice, Subaru turned his attention to a finely clothed man standing adjacent to himself.
“What didyoujust say?” he said threateningly, failing to hide his disdain for the man, though quickly correcting his tone. “I-I mean . . . what does this board say? I can’t read it.”
The nobleman turned to Subaru and smiled softly, saying, “Ah, another illiterate . . . very well; where to begin?”
Slowly, the nobleman inched his face close to the board and adjusted his monocle. His white-gloved finger rose to the first glyph and moved slowly across the board, absorbing each detail meticulously as if he were studying an ancient text.
Subaru felt himself going red. It kept every ounce of his restraint from losing his cool demeanour. He glared at the nobleman, and said: “I deeply appreciate your help. I just wanted to know what’s going on, that’s all.”
Done reading to himself, the nobleman exchanged another look with Subaru, saying, “Well, there’s both good news and bad news here. The bad news: Margrave Mathers is either dead or missing. His mansion was found ransacked, and the neighbouring village of Irlam was deserted. Scouts were sent to the Sanctuary of Kremaldy, where the place was found to be burnt to the ground, down to every last building.”
“Burned to the ground?” Subaru asked, in a different tone than before.
His voice had changed, turning much darker, catching even the nobleman off guard.
“Well, yes, that is correct,” he continued, drawing his gaze back to the noticeboard. “It says here the fires seemed to have started recently, maybe a day or two prior. However, the cathedral was burned down earlier in the week.”
“A week earlier?” Subaru asked, clearly surprised. It had been almost two weeks since the Great Hare had attacked, and this signpost had the posted date of today. That would mean someone else went back to the Sanctuary and wiped clean whatever remained from the events before.Someone must have been trying to cover their trackshe thought. But who?
The nobleman nodded. “It continues, saying: none of Margrave Mathers’ subjects were found, and it is assumed none have survived whatever occurred there. This includes the half-demon, Emilia: otherwise known as the Royal Selection Candidate who was just recently sponsored by Margrave Mathers himself. Due to there being no King, a new Royal Sorcerer cannot be selected, and Margrave Mathers’ lands have been absorbed by the Kingdom of Lugnica under the authority of the Sage Council. It says as well that the neighbouring village of Nicia was sacked and destroyed, and it is unknown what caused it. The few of the incident were found to be suffering from some manner of head injury, including the village head, Neryemar.”
“And . . . the good news?” Subaru asked, eying him carefully.
The man pondered thoughtfully. “Ah yes,” he said. “I was just getting there. It seems that after the coalition between the two camps which resulted in the demise of the White Whale, Lady Crusch has declared both Lady Anastasia and Lady Priscilla enemies of war. Perhaps out of an abundance of caution, or jealousy. She seems to be just alittleparanoid about what happened to Margrave Mathers and the half-witch.”
Subaru winced. “How is thatgoodnews?” he asked, wondering if there was a punchline to the joke. “The future rulers of Lugnica shouldn’t be squabbling over what happened . . . No, they should be finding out the cause of it! What is fighting each other going to solve?”
“You may have a point,” said the nobleman, “but from a trader’s standpoint, this type of discourse will be very good for the Lugnican markets.”
“That’s such a stupid answer,” Subaru said.
The low growl of his voice making it clear he almost didn’t want to respond.
But nobleman snorted anyway, saying, “From your point of view, maybe; however, there will be a growing dissatisfaction amongst the Kingdom’s Commercial Union, if their trade restrictions and tariffs aren’t lifted before long. Anastasia Hoshin would be the ideal candidate for Lugnica trade. And with that pitiful half-devil out of the way, the list of contenders grows shorter. Imagine that, sponsoring a half-witch to be the ruler of the Dragon Kingdom of Lugnica—it was a jest for sure, a joke made in poor taste from the court jester Margrave Mathers himself.” And the nobleman let out a hearty laugh.
That was it—Subaru suddenly stepped forward and grabbed the nobleman by the collar of his silk shirt. “You take back what you said about her, you bastard,” he spat, visibly upset at the nobleman’s callous words. “You take that back now, or I’ll—”
“Enough—!”
The feminine voice interrupted Subaru—a voice he knew all too well.
Both Subaru and the shocked nobleman turned their heads in the direction of the new voice. Subaru’s grip tightened around the man’s collar as he met eyes with Emilia, her own piercing as if she were a mother disappointed in her child.
“Emilia,” he said. His voice quivered and gripped weakened under her pointed gaze. “This isn’t what it looks like. This bastard right here—he needs to be taught a lesson. I’m tired of arguing with these kinds of people . . .”
The nobleman realized it was the right moment for him to pull back, slapping Subaru’s hand away disgustedly. Subaru let him do it and put up no resistance.
“I will call the guards immediately!” he exclaimed triumphantly while adjusting his tie. “Mark my words! I’ll see you thrown in the jail for laying your grubby little hands on me. To think a human like yourself would go to such lengths to defend a half-demon, a spawn of the Witch—nothing more than a freak! If I were in charge, I would make sure none of these witch-spawn walked these golden roads!”
Then what happened next was all very sudden. The young, hooded woman stepped forward, then came a brutalslapright across the nobleman’s left cheek, sending him back against the noticeboard, dizzied and incoherent.
Emilia’s breath was uneven, and she clearly had lost all self-control due to the man’s vile words. Her hands were down by her side, were tightened into fists, her knuckles turning white from the pressure. Her expression was one of anger, sadness, and disappointment—so much so Subaru could tell she might fryandfreeze this guy at barely a moment’s notice.
Her normally pale complexion began to flush a deep red, but before she could open her mouth, Subaru grabbed her arm with his right hand and pulled her against him.
Looking into her purple eyes, and seeing her pupils boring holes into him, he pleaded, saying, “Emilia, you just need to ignore him. His mind is already made up. nothing you say or do is going to change him. I was wrong to start a fight with him, but sometimes I just get so mad when people treat you like this.”
She pulled away slightly, and Subaru released her arm, letting her step away from him just a bit. Instinctively, Subaru looked around to examine their surroundings. By now, a couple denizens who had been passing by had stopped to see what the commotion was. Subaru realized they were drawing unwanted attention to themselves, and that they should move away from here,quickly. His gaze turned back toward Emilia, who stood in front of him, clearly pouting.
She placed her hands on her hips. “You don’t always need to protect me, Subaru,” she said pointedly. “I know you must always feel you are my sword and shield, but sometimes . . . let me be the sword for once.”
Subaru took her hand again and gave it a tug. “Look, Emilia . . . I’m really sorry, but can we go argue about this somewhere else?”
He turned his head and looked over his shoulder. The snobby nobleman had regained consciousness and was running off to call the guards.
Emilia’s free hand rose to her mouth, shocked. “Oh, no!” she said. “Let’s get away from here!”
And as if on cue, they could see two guards running toward them from the distance. Pulling Emilia along with him, Subaru dashed into the large crowd on the sidewalk and disappeared into the throngs of patrons and merchants alike, leaving the two guards without any hope of capturing them. And moments later, after they had passed into the depths of safety, Emilia fell out of step, and while panting, she tucked her silver hair back into her hood. She was breathless from running, but was nonetheless bent on pressing the previous conversation from before. She stood up straight and prodded Subaru in the chest with her pointer finger.
“Sometimes I’mveeerydisappointed with you, Subaru!” Emilia said in her scolding away. But it was still cute, the way her lilac eyes shined with a playful glint. “I know you are my knight, but sometimes you need to have a little more faith in me!”
Subaru brushed off his leather jerkin and made a polite bow.. “Oh,myLady Emilia, I am so, so sorry,” he said mockingly. “What ever can I do to make things up to you?”
Emilia smiled but didn’t laugh. “Please don’t bow,myknight,” she said. “While you have disappointed your Lady, she is fortunately a very forgiving person. But you can make it up to me by letting me stand by your side, instead of you standing in front of me, you big dunderhead!”
Subaru realized while this was a joking matter, what she said was deadly serious. She desired to be equals with him, and she wanted to protect him just as much as he strove to protect her. This wasn’t the first time she made Subaru aware she was tired of his protectiveness, as it had happened already many times before.
Hopefully this time, it would be the last, he thought. “I’m really sorry,” Subaru then replied, “but sometimes I just can’t help myself with you, Emilia! That guy was saying such disgusting things about you, and I couldn’t control myself this time. Usually, I defend you with words, but this time . . . this time, I wanted to beat some sense into that guy. There was something so wrong with his point of view. I knew I couldn’t argue with him, and I certainly couldn’t convince him.”
“You don’t have to always defend me!” Emilia said, her tone rising. “You know I’m strong enough to defend myself! I’ve been going through this my whole life, and I will probably have to deal with it for the rest of it . . . You understand that, don’t you, Subaru?”
His eyes widened in understanding. “I was being selfish again, wasn’t I?” Subaru asked rhetorically, letting out a dark chuckle. “This seems to be a repeating pattern—something ingrained in my nature I can’t be rid of.”
“I don’t need another apology, Subaru,” Emilia said quickly, and as firmly as she could. “Don’t feel as if you have to apologize to me for anything. I know how you are, but if we are going to be together like this—we should have arguments like this once and a while. Puck once told me it’s good for healthy relationships to have arguments!”
It was one of the reasons Subaru loved her: she was always so understanding. She strived hard to give every word escaping her soft lips as much thought as she could, so her words would never hurt anyone. Even now, after the devastating events which took place, Emilia was still the same as ever.
Subaru flashed her a quick, loving smile, saying, “You really are something special, little Emilia.”
At the return of her infamous pet name, Emilia pouted heavily. Then, she could hear an odd sound—it took her a second to realize Subaru was indeed, laughing, and it was a jovial laughter he hadn’t let out in quite some time.
Emilia’s face went red as she said: “Subaru you . . . You blockhead!”
Said blockhead raised his hands in order to calm Emilia—it was difficult to suppress the continued laughter he wanted to release. He didn’t want to tease her too much, just poke fun at her a little bit.
“There you go with those antiquated names again,” he teased her carefully. “What are you going to call me next, I wonder?”
And she smiled, saying, “Oh, Subaru . . . there’spleeentymore where that came from.”
By now, the two had closed the gap between themselves, to where their foreheads were almost touching during their argument.
“Oh yeah?” he asked. “Let her rip, let’s see what you got!”
“Let itrip. . .?” Emilia asked, clearly confused at what he meant. “Is that another perverted word I don’t know about? Subaru, you pervert!”
Subaru’s smile widened. And he said: “Why do you always think everything I say means something inappropriate? That’s just not the case! Maybeyouare the perverted one, after all! Doesn’t it seem like your mind is always travelling to the wrong places?”
Emilia’s cheeks turned red and she shut her eyes in abashment. She said: “You take that back right now, Subaru!”
“Emilia the Pervert! Emilia the Pervert! Emilia the Pervert!”
Subaru repeated it often, and she grew redder and redder every time he said it.
“—Stop!” Emilia said, pulling her cat-eared hood further over her head to make sure her appearance was concealed. “We’re in public, you know! What if someone hears you?”
By now, another bout of laughter escaped his throat. “You should see your pretty face!” he said, struggling to speak through his convulsions. “You are just too cute, little Emilia!”
“You know I dislike being teased, Subaru!” Emilia exclaimed. “It’s . . . It’s so embarrassing.” She paused, and found her voice again after a moment, saying, “I just can’t weather these indignities, especially when they come from you!”
Subaru patted her on the shoulder, reassuringly. “Okay, okay, that’s enough I suppose. Sometimes I just can’t help myself, you know, Emilia? You are justtooadorable when you are pouting or embarrassed! It’s times like these I had almost totally forgotten about!”
“Even though I dislike your teasing, you are right,” Emilia said, regaining her composure. “It has been a while . . . since we talked like this, I mean. This almost feels like a long-forgotten memory, even though it really wasn’t that long ago!”
Subaru gave her a heart-warming smile, saying, “It’s like I always said: Once you get past the bad times, the good times have to follow, right?”
“Right!” Emilia said, returning his smile with her own, melting him with her cuteness. “Which reminds me—” From a pocket inside her cloak she withdrew a small pouch of gold. “I guess I forgot to tell you, but I borrowed a bit of gold from the mansion before we left. I figured if we took a trip to the capital, it would show its usefulness. More importantly, I wanted to look for a Pyroxene mana crystal. For Puck, I mean.”
“A Pyroxene crystal?” Subaru asked, scratching the side of his head. “Oh, yeah! I remember that. It’s one of those crystals which can hold a Great Spirit inside of them, right? We can find one of those here?”
Emilia nodded and said, “Yes, there is a store around here which sells magical items of great value. They are usually pretty expensive, and difficult to obtain . . . so they may not have any, but I wanted to check just to be sure.”
Subaru looked off into the distant horizon where the Lugnica Keep rest at the top of the mountain. The sun was currently high in the sky, signifying it was still early in the afternoon. By now, the dragon-carriages and wagons pouring in and out of the capital had ceased to a halt, stuck in some sort of medieval traffic—if that could even exist in the first place.
Subaru held out his hand for Emilia and said: “Let’s start now before it gets too late. We wouldn’t want to miss it because the store closed.”
Taking his hand, she clasped her fingers around his own and smiled. “Thank you, Subaru!” she said. “This means so much to me; I hope you know that. If there’s a chance for me to reform my contract with Puck, I must have one of those crystals.”
So the pair began walking down the Lugnican sidewalk, scanning the signs for any mention of magical goods. As the two walked side-by-side, hand-in-hand, Subaru turned his head to Emilia and smiled. And there, looking upon her with gazing eyes, her sublime beauty captured every ounce of his attention. She hadn’t noticed he was gawking at her while they walked as a couple—because if she had, her cheeks would be painted a bright blood-red due to how lustful his gaze was.
Her physical beauty was unmatched by anyone else in this world, yes, but it was the beauty of her personality, her character, and her actions which made her stand out above all the rest. Even with all her imperfections, her perfections were more than just a step ahead—they went on for miles and would likely not be matched.
Suddenly, a gentle voice broke him from his trance.
“Hey, Subaru, are you listening to what I just said?” Emilia asked, staring at him with eyes of lavender.
Subaru shook his head and said, “Sorry, I was just deep in thought, that’s all.”
Emilia tilted her head cutely. “Oh, I see. Erm . . . I said we—Oh, never mind, just look above you.” Instead of explaining, she pointed her finger toward a wooden sign which was painted blue and in the shape of a crystal—much like the one Emilia wore at the base of her neck.‘Magical Assortments and Relics’, the signpost read.
“Ah, so we found it,” Subaru said, running his hand through his dark hair coolly.
“We?” she asked, giggling quietly to herself. “Yes, well . . . let’s go ahead and look inside. I’m sure there’s going to be lots of interesting items in here, so don’t wander too far without me! I don’t want us spending all of our gold here today.”
Subaru nodded and followed Emilia into the magical shop. As they stepped inside, Subaru’s eyes widened in shock.
The shop was much bigger on the inside than it had appeared from the streets of Lugnica. Not only was the store filled with both human and demi-human customers alike, but he could tell the store itself appeared almost magical. There were tall winding wood shelves which reached high above into the air, and were adorned with trinkets, items, and assortments alike. There’s no way this store was this big, he thought, as he looked up and down, taken aback at how vast everything was.
Subaru then knelt and eyed one of the labels on a shelf.
It read ‘Bokko fruits – 1 blessed gold coin each’. These fruits were an item of particular value which restored mana, he remembered. Taking a handful of the bokko fruits, Subaru wrapped them in paper and stored them in his pocket. He knew these would come in handy during any future excursion they might have.
Standing once more, Subaru looked around. He couldn’t see Emilia anywhere, as she had already run off deeper into the store in search for her crystal she so eagerly wanted. Subaru shrugged and kept walking along the shelves, eyeing what else the store had to offer.
He took a metia off the shelf and looked at it carefully. He had lost his cellphone some time ago, but he couldn’t help but laugh to himself at how he played it off as a metia for so long. They truly looked nothing alike, and probably didn’t have close to the same functions.
Then suddenly, a patron to Subaru’s right turned around and gasped.
“Look, is that who I think it is?” he said, while pointing at the entrance to the shop.
There, blanketed by light, was an older white-haired gentleman garbed in a black-silken vest and a white-collared undershirt. At his side hung a long blade, the golden hilt glistening brilliantly in the light. He placed his left hand on his hilt and stood up straight, his perpetual frown threatening to strike fear into all who bore witness to it.
“Wilhelm?” Subaru disbelievingly muttered quietly, immediately turning to conceal his presence.
“That’s the Sword Demon, Wilhelm van Astrea!” the nameless patron hissed, turning to Subaru before continuing. “After what happened at the Mathers domain, it is said that Master Wilhelm came out of retirement in order to bring those responsible to justice. He broke his oath to Lady Crusch and claimed the Holy Sword Astrea for himself, and has taken up the mantle of knighthood once again. After serving faithfully for years, I wonder what could have possibly pushed him to make such a drastic decision?”
“Wilhelm broke his oath to Crusch?” Subaru said with a gasp. “He broke his contract for us?”
He couldn’t believe Wilhelm would go to such great lengths to avenge the deaths those who weren’t his master.
Wilhelm walked proudly into the shop and passed Subaru, leaving the young man shocked in his wake. Subaru just stared as he disappeared into the back of the store, unsure of what to think or do. As much as he wanted to call out to Wilhelm and let him know both he and Emilia were okay, he couldn’t—or else Emilia would be endangered yet again if word got out she was still alive.
So while he waited for Emilia to come back, he found himself deep in thought. How would he explain to her what was happening? She would no doubt be disturbed to hear the notion of her demise had caused such political ramifications. No doubt, if Emilia found out, she would make it known she was still alive, even if it caused her personal great risk. That was the kind of person Emilia was: self-sacrificing, even if it to a fault. He wondered to himself: should he hide the truth from her, or should he tell her and let her make her own decision?
After a minute of thought, Subaru decided he would tell her, since he figured, that in time, she would discover what was happening anyway.
Gentle footsteps pulled him from his introspection. And there in front of him was Emilia, who stood emptyhanded.
“They didn’t have a crystal,” she said lamentingly. “They said that recently someone had ordered a large shipment of them which put them out of stock. I inquired further so we might know when another shipment is coming, but they didn’t have any answers.”
“I see, that’s too bad,” Subaru said, scratching the growing scruff on his chin. “Let’s go somewhere else, then. I don’t like lingering in the same spot at once.” He didn’t want to divulge any more information than he had to.
“Okay,” Emilia said, disappointment heavily laden in her voice.
Subaru took Emilia’s hand and turned on his heel toward the exit. He flipped a couple gold coins to the merchant standing at the door, saying, “These are for five Bokko fruits. Thanks.”
The merchant nodded to Subaru and counted the coins carefully as he passed by.
But justt before Subaru met through the exit, he heard a gentle yet booming voice come up from behind him:
“Hold on you two. Just one moment, please.”
It was Wilhelm van Astrea.
Subaru froze in place, shocked, his grip tightening on Emilia, which alarmed her. Without knowing better, she turned to face who had beckoned for them, her hands by her side and ready to cast any manner of magic in order to defend them.
“Good afternoon, my lady,” Wilhelm bowed politely, before introducing himself, “I am Wilhelm van Astrea, and I couldn’t help but notice your conversation with the merchant earlier. I heard you were looking for a Pyroxene crystal, am I correct?”
Subaru had turned away at the last second, and simply let go of her hand and awkwardly walked out the door, leaving the hooded-but-disguised Emilia alone to converse with the gentlemanly knight.
“I’m sorry, was I interrupting something?” Wilhelm asked, his eyes narrowing suspiciously.
“Oh no, good sir,” she said, giving a small but polite curtsy. “Have we met before?” The man looked oddly familiar, as if this wasn’t the first time they had met.
“I am Wilhelm van Astrea—formerly Wilhelm Trias,” he said, returning her curtsy with his own bow. “I do not believe we have met before, but I could be mistaken. Forgive me if I have forgotten who you are. . . Well, I didn’t catch your name . . .”
“Ah, my name is Lia,” she said from behind her magical disguise. “I’m pleased to meet your acquaintance Master Wilhelm.”
“Likewise,” he said, adjusting his grip on the blade’s hilt. “As I mentioned before, I heard you were in search for a Pyroxene crystal. It must be happenstance, then, because I know where you might find one of these rare, but sought-after trinkets.”
“You do?” Emilia asked, her attention fully captured. “Please tell us! I desperately need one . . .” Emilia looked at the man with two wide, amethyst eyes, silently pleading for him to aid her.
“Many years ago, there was a cave to the north of Cramlin in the mountains of Cordor,” he began, adjusting the cuffs of his sleeves. “Inside this cave, there are many lagmite crystals which have grown old and in very odd ways. Unfortunately, this cave is guarded by a Sandworm—a demon-beast of both considerable size, vitality and ferociousness. The Sandworm is typically native to the Augria Sand Dunes—but, many years ago, a pod of them made its way westward and took up residence very near here. I myself had a run in with it in the past—but while one was slayed, its kin still tread. Historically, the Kingdom Knights have cautioned travellers to avoid the caverns entirely out of threat for this beast, even if such a vast amount of mana crystals does exist there.”
“A Sandworm, huh?” Emilia wondered to herself. In her mind, she saw an overgrown garden worm, the kind she would see digging around in the yard of the Mathers mansion. “That doesn’t soundsoooscary.”
“Take my word for it,” Wilhelm said, cautioning her. “This is no mere worm you and I would normally come across. This worm can grow to a huge, monstrous size. It has razor-sharp teeth, and twisted demon-horns jutting out of its brow.”
“Do you think there is an easy way to defeat it?” Emilia asked, sincere in her determination. “I only ask this because, acquiring one of those crystals is of the upmost importance! You must understand, Master Wilhelm!”
Wilhelm eyed the brown-haired girl carefully. “Admittedly, I was planning on heading out in that direction in order to search for something. Maybe our paths might cross again in the future, and I will lend you the aid of my blade.”
Emilia’s eyes brightened with joy. “Oh, Master Wilhelm! That would be much appreciated, and I would be in your debt!”
Giving one last gentlemanly bow, Wilhelm started for the exit. “Until next time,My Lady.”
Intrigued at the title he had bestowed her; Emilia followed the mysterious knight out of the store and back into the cobblestoned streets of Lugnica. She looked around, but saw no sign of Wilhelm van Astrea. At a loss, she sat down against a nearby bench and thought to herself. After a moment, in the corner of her eye, she could see Subaru approaching her.
Emilia stole a glance at the young, brown-haired man in front of her. His hands were in his pockets, and he gave her a nonchalant expression.He looks sooo cool, she thought.
“So, what did you two talk about?” Subaru asked, as he sat next to her on the bench. “It’s certainly not every day you are approached by Wilhelm van Astrea.”
Emilia chuckled politely. “He didn’t recognize who I was, or at least Ithinkhe didn’t. It seems the magic of my cloak is working just as well as ever.” She smiled at him, before continuing. “To think he overheard my conversation with the merchant—I never expected that.”
“He overheard you?” Subaru asked, his interest growing ever still. “About the crystal, you mean?”
“Yes, he did,” Emilia replied positively. “Master Wilhelm informed me of a location where we may find a crystal to house Puck. He said it was in the mountains: near a village called Cramlin, and it’s even close by. Isn’t thatsooolucky?”
Subaru smiled back at her before saying, “That sounds like a plan, but what’s the catch?”
“So, you see . . . erm, ” she said, and paused nervously, unsure of how Subaru would respond. But she continued anyway, saying, “He mentioned it was guarded by something called a Sandworm: a powerful demon-beast in the shape much like a worm. It even has horns, andoooh, razor-sharp teeth!”
Subaru winced at that last part. “Razor-sharp teeth?!” he gasped. “You think one would mention first that it has teeth sharper than daggers! What kind of worm has teeth anyway?”
Emilia giggled to herself. Then said: “Well, at first I thought it was just an oversized worm like the ones in Roswaal’s garden, but Wilhelm stressed these demon-beasts are no common foe.”
“Do you think we can defeat it?” Subaru asked. It was an honest question. “All I have is my sword, and my skill there is lacking. Of course, you could turn it into a fried worm if you wanted, but I feel bad being so useless!”
“You aren’t useless, Subaru,” Emilia chided, poking him in the forehead with her finger. “You arefarfrom useless! You have saved me more times than I can count . . . and you have plenty of strength; you just don’t know it yet. You need to believe in yourself, like you believe in me . . .” Her voice, starting out strong, grew weaker near the end.
Subaru’s mouth curled mischievously. He turned to meet her amethyst eyes, saying, “You know, Emilia, you look beautiful when you are passionate about something.”
Emilia’s face turned red. “W-why did you say that?” she asked, her voice faltering. “How come you changed the subject so easily like that? We weren’t talking about me. You know that!”
“Yeah, but I just felt like talking about you,” Subaru admitted, unabashed and undeterred. “I can’t help you’re the most mesmerizing thing in this world to me. Every time I get one good look at you, I feel like I’m going to explode with passion.”
Without warning, he pecked her on the cheek with a kiss, catching Emilia off guard and almost sending her falling off the bench.
“Su-Subaru!” Emilia squeaked, stumbling over her words as if her tongue was in a knot. “You know we’re in public, don’t you?! What do you think other people will believe if they see you kissing me in public, you pervert!”
“Pervert?” Subaru asked, his jaw dropping. “Is that the insult you always default on . . . and we kiss all the time, have you forgotten? Remember a couple weeks ago; what happened between us? I think I have earned the right to steal a kiss or two from you on occasion.”
Emilia’s face blossomed to a deep red at the thought of what happened between them. Even if it was a moment of pure, uncontrolled passion—it was proof she hadn’t forgotten—and soon she felt herself heating up.
“Subaru, it feelssooohot out here, you know?” she said, swooning, and fanning herself with her right hand gently. “Ireeeallyfeel like I’m melting as if I’m a candle.”
“You realize it’s getting cooler as the day goes on, right?” Subaru asked, fanning her as well. “We’re sitting in the shade too. It isn’t going to get much better than this. Anyway, back to the worm-thing or whatever.”
Emilia laid back against the bench in a daze from the heat. “Ah, right . . . yes—thewooorm. . .” she said. It appeared she was barely coherent at this point.
Subaru, noticing this, continued his questioning anyway. “Well, do you even know where to go? Come to think of it, I really need to purchase a map before we leave this place. That would help things, a lot.”
“I have never been there myself . . . but I do know where to go,” Emilia said, regaining her composure. “We just need to take the road south out of Lugnica, and then travel along the east road, and it should take us straight to Cramlin. Wilhelm said the caverns near there were teeming with mana crystals. Which reminds me . . . erm . . . Subaru.”
Noticing her hesitant voice, Subaru perked up. “What is it, Emilia?”
“There’s just one problem,” Emilia said and then paused, her voice hesitant. “Master Wilhelm mentioned he was heading in that direction as well. I’m not sure if you wanted to avoid him or not . . . but he said if he were in the area, that he would help us with the worm.”
He was going there too? he thought. If that was the case, then maybe they could use him to their advantage, but it was dangerous to be exposed for sure. He then looked at Emilia straight in the eye. “I don’t think we should expose our identities to him, or anyone else we used to know,” he advised pointedly. “Which reminds me, I need to let you know what has happened since the events at the Sanctuary . . . but I’m not sure if I can.”
Emilia sat up and eyed Subaru carefully. “You can tell me Subaru, it’s okay,” she said, grasping his hand lovingly. “You can tell me anything! Don’t ever feel like you need to hide anything from me.”
“I know I can tell you anything, but . . .” Subaru said, not knowing where to start. He cleared his throat and then began again, saying, “In response to what happened at the Sanctuary, Crusch, Priscilla and Anastasia are all in a state of war. None of them trusted each other to begin with, and now some trust each other even less than before. They don’t know who to point fingers at and blame for what happened at the Sanctuary. I overheard someone saying Wilhelm had abandoned his service to Crusch in order to search out whatever was responsible for attacking us.”
“Is that so,” Emilia said, her voice low. “Would Master Wilhelm do something like that for us? I don’t know whether to be sad or happy.”
“Yeah,” Subaru said, his voice serious and unmistakable. “If that’s not bad enough already, I am strictly against us revealing our identities or making it known we are still alive. I care about you, Emilia, and I want us to live long happy lives. I know you cared a lot about the Royal Selection, and you would have made a wonderful Queen, but I fear for your safety if people find out you are still alive.”
Emilia just nodded, absorbing his words. “I understand, Subaru,” she said, a sad smile gracing her lips. “I wish things didn’t turn out this way. I wanted to help people; I really did. I mean, I guess I’m still a Royal Selection Candidate, even if I don’t have the backing of Roswaal, right?”
Subaru shrugged, unsure of an answer. “I don’t know for sure, but I feel like it’s best we let that opportunity pass by the wayside. However, I want you to know no matter what you want to do, I will follow you, Emilia. I will beyourknight, whether it is serving you as a Royal Selection Candidate, a queen, or just Emilia: the spirit-arts user. I just don’t care!” His voice, subdued at the beginning, rose to almost a yell as he spoke those final words.
“Subaru,” Emilia breathlessly said, her voice hitching. “Thank you so much for your support!”
She thanked him with a smile both wide and sincere. And unexpectedly, Emilia scooted closer to Subaru and looked up to him with tear-laden eyes. Subaru gazed down at her and smiled softly, reaching an arm around her shoulder, pulling her in reassuringly. She gave him a kiss on the cheek which lingered for far longer than he thought it would. As her soft lips departed his skin, he immediately felt a cold chill replacing the warmth of her kiss. Oh, how he wanted her to be attached to him forever like that, and to never leave his skin.
His hand went to touch the place where her lips had just been. “Emilia?” he said, a loss of words stifling his ability to speak. “Thanks for the kiss . . .”
The gratitude was welcomed but unneeded. She said: “Subaru, there will be many more from where that came from.” Her voice was both playful and filled with love. “But to respond to what you said . . . for now, I think we should just go on our way and stay out of the politics of Lugnica. I agree with what you said: that bringing us back into the thick of things would cause more trouble than fix it. As much as I feel so terrible for putting Lady Crusch and the others through this, I don’t want to bring us anymore harm. Right now, I just want to focus on us, Subaru.”
And when Subaru heard that last sentence, he almost suffered a heart attack right then and there. He thought he would never hear something like that from Emilia, ever. In just a couple weeks, she had already matured beyond her past self, not only emotionally, but mentally, too. Her admission of being included in the Royal Selection created danger for herself and everyone around her; her decision to focus on just themselves. Quite frankly, Subaru wanted to kiss her again right here and now, but he didn’t.
“You really think so, Emilia?” Subaru asked, turning to Emilia.
“Yes, with all my heart,” she said, truly meaning it. “I think for now, we have enough to worry about with just us two,together. We should go our own path and see where it leads us. Before this, I was just being led by Roswaal after being convinced to take part in the Royal Selection. But now, I want to do what I truly desire. . . and that is be with you, Subaru.”
He simply looked at her with wide, unblinking eyes. Subaru didn’t know what to think at this point. His mind was filled with emotion, confusion, and hesitation. Without a word, he reached out a hand to touch her cheek, and he felt the smoothness of her skin. Returning the gesture, she wrapped both of her hands around his own and pressed her face against him.
“I love you, Emilia,” Subaru whispered to her, almost soundlessly, his mouth close to her ear. “You know how important you are to me. I would doanythingto make you happy. I’m comfortable with any decision you make, please know that.”
“I know,” Emilia said, her voice barely a whisper and filled with love. “You aresoooamazing, Subaru. I’msoooglad you found me. I don’t know what I would do without you. Without you, I would still be lost, unhappy, and alone. I didn’t want to realize it, but I now know why Puck broke his contract with me: he did it so I could realize my love for you. He truly wanted me to be happy, and that’s why we need to get him back.” After this realization, Emilia let out a deep sigh into Subaru’s neck, releasing her stress.
By now, the Lugnican sun was starting to set behind the castle walls, basking the surrounding area in a vivid orangish colour. The ground-dragons which had previously covered the expanse of the main road had started to dwindle in number, signifying the day was truly near its end. Likewise, the hustle and bustle from earlier had shrunk to a lower number, leaving just vagabonds and wayfarers travelling to and from their destinations. And the two sat comfortably together for some time on the bench, before one of them stirred.
Subaru stretched out his arms and yawned, saying, “It looks like things are dying down around here. It was a nice afternoon; what do you say to turning in for the night, before making the trek to Cramlin village tomorrow?”
Emilia, perking up in response to him, said, “Oh, Subaru? Youreeeallymean that? Are we truly going to Cramlin village tomorrow?” She was surprised he was so receptive to her idea, even when considering Wilhelm was heading there as well.
“Seeing as I miss that fuzzy little cat as much as you do,” Subaru said, smiling to Emilia. “I just figured we should take our next lead in our quest for getting him back, don’t you think?”
Emilia nodded ferociously. “Oh, yes! I bet Puck will besooohappy to see you, Subaru. He will be so proud you have taken care of me so well. I’m sure of it.”
Yeah, I’m sure of it,he thought. Truthfully, he had a bone to pick with that mischievous little fuzzball of a cat. His actions, or lack thereof, had put Emilia in more danger than the Great Spirit probably thought. Even though Puck wasn’t responsible for the events which happened at the Sanctuary, Subaru would have a difficult time forgiving him for mental stress and emotional damage he had caused Emilia. Even so, if Emilia wanted to get her pseudo-father back, then he would do everything in his power to aid her. That’s just the kind of oath he took: to serve, and protect her, even die for her if need be.
He really hoped that last part wouldn’t be necessary.
“Well, that settles it, then,” Subaru said. “Let’s head back to the tavern and get some rest. Then tomorrow, we set out for Cramlin village, and put the worm to the test.”
Emilia looked up at him once more with eyes which were clearly deeply in love. It almost scared Subaru how quickly she had fallen with him, now at last that she was alone with him. Of course, he didn’t want to argue with how love worked, but something still bothered him. It was probably because he realized she would have never fallen for him this fast if the events at the Sanctuary didn’t happen as they did.
But brushing those thoughts from his mind, he tugged on her hood, pulling it further over her silver-threaded hair.
“Ow . . . Subaru, what was that for?” Emilia said, looking up at him.
“If you stare at me too long, Emilia, you might catch a cold,” Subaru said, laughing softly to himself. “I’ve been known to have that effect on people.”
“I-I wasn’t staring,” Emilia said, her cheeks growing red once more. “You were staring at me!”
The two stared at each other momentarily in silence, and then shared a long, joyous laugh. It was times like these the two would cherish in the future to come. In recent weeks, there wasn’t a whole lot of chance or time for laughter like the two shared now. It was a pure, unabated laughter which didn’t show any signs of underlying stress or discomfort. It was quite simply happiness: pure, blissful happiness.
Subaru grinned at Emilia, who returned with a simple smile. She turned her head inquisitively at the man who was assaulting her with his big toothy grin. And after a moment of taking in every detail of his battle-worn face, she recognized something extraordinary: Emilia realized smiling changed Subaru’s face significantly—realizing that lately, he hadn’t been smiling very often. From now on, she would make it her priority to protect his smile, just as he spent all his energy to protect her.
Both Subaru and Emilia were thinking about one another as they walked, hand-in-hand through the streets of Lugnica, disappearing into the warm, summer night.
